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Chapter 5 Section 9 - Baroness' Mercy


Alter Native

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Welcome to the last episode of Chapter 5 of Blood and Pleasure. Nora is about to go for a ride, when suddenly her new stable boy makes a sloppy mistake.

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Short Summary of the previous entries:

 

 


After murdering her old friend Eric, Nora took over his realm as well as the associated vampire employees. 
 

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Shortly after she decides to recruit new human servants in a nearby village. Besides Fina, who is going to work in the kitchen and housekeeping Nora decides, for the lack of choice, to recruit the young Nord Stan who is going to work in the stables from now on, taking care of Nora's horse.

 

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A complete summary of previous chapters of this story as well as short character summaries can be found here.

 


Of Blood and Pleasure on Tumblr

 


Chapter 5 Section 9 - Baroness' Mercy

 

 

 

 

 


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Thanks for reading guys and a special Thank you, if you are one of the now 100 followers of this blog. If not, consider becoming the 101st.

That's it for chapter 5, initially this section was a two parter with a cut right before Nora switches into the lingerie and becomes mean, with the second part being chapter 10. I decided against that last minute because the first part would have been a lot of build up without any payoff and the second part would just be sex with all the tension and background gone. This also means, that this section was again really long (200+ Screenshots). I'm not sure about the length of my entries, Chapter 6 has a lot of really long entries as well.

Could you guys please give me feedback on the length of the entries? Whether you felt the last entries (this one and the panther (Section 8)) were too long or not. If so, I can still adjust the setup/splitting of Chapter 6 a bit. I don't want to do another poll like last year, but if you read this, you're probably part of my core audience, so but please let me know what you think about it.

Personally I am really satisfied with Chapter 5 and consider it the best so far besides Chapter 2 (2 fell a bit short on some technically aspects).
The first half was very story driven with some sex where it made sense and the second half were mostly closed "short or mini" stories (Panther, the Village or this one) that told their own story without being just sex without much context. All of these short stories still tied more or less into the main story and the bigger picture of Nora's world, even if they didn't advance the "main plot" too much.

I'll start posting Chpater 6 soonish when I'm done updating the summary page with the events and persons of Chapter 5, fingers crossed. Have a nice weekend.


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Edited by Alter Native

23 Comments


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IMHO think the length of the entries is just right. Length does not oppress the reader if it is interesting and keeps the tension.
Excellent entry. Survive such a meeting with Nora - you need either great luck or do good fuck, I think.

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In the first moment i thought, he is Gay. Such a superb and dangerous Woman and he says  - No, Baroness. - Good Chapter again :)

 

I just thinking about an other Chapter/Plot - what if she meets a Succubus, maybe an old acquaintance from the Past, a rival or an one night affair.

 

Waiting for the next chapter :)

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3 hours ago, Crw said:

IMHO think the length of the entries is just right. Length does not oppress the reader if it is interesting and keeps the tension.
Excellent entry. Survive such a meeting with Nora - you need either great luck or do good fuck, I think.

Thanks for the feedback on the length and your comment. 

 

1 hour ago, zilvradrow said:

In the first moment i thought, he is Gay. Such a superb and dangerous Woman and he says  - No, Baroness. - Good Chapter again :)

 

I just thinking about an other Chapter/Plot - what if she meets a Succubus, maybe an old acquaintance from the Past, a rival or an one night affair.

 

Waiting for the next chapter :)

Thanks ;). The story up to chapter 8-9 is mostly done, so there is little room for new content like this in the next chapter. There are no Succubi in my world, but there will definitely be lesbian - vampire-vampire content in the next chapter(s), I hope this works as well.

 

56 minutes ago, Resdayn said:

Great chapter :D  I enjoyed.

 

Nora is one damn sexy beast ;) 

Thanks :)

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Stan looked like he was off to a bad start playing the game, but he made it all the way to the end - way to go!

For the length: I feel it's quite alright despite having this many screenshots, because the pacing between each picture is reasonably fast - not too much reading or scrutiny to each. It should be alright too if it's a lil' shorter, but perhaps not any longer! :)

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Length's all good, think yer hit that mystical sweet-spot with it.

 

And Stan did not loose his head, or get forced to wear a dunce's cap. Admit it, Nora's jus' a kitten really >:D

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3 hours ago, Rattlesnark said:

Stan looked like he was off to a bad start playing the game, but he made it all the way to the end - way to go!

For the length: I feel it's quite alright despite having this many screenshots, because the pacing between each picture is reasonably fast - not too much reading or scrutiny to each. It should be alright too if it's a lil' shorter, but perhaps not any longer! :)

Thanks for your input, I'm not happy with the length myself, at some point and that point is reached when you have a 200+ screenshot entry you have to decrease the quality of the jpgs a bit for not having to make the reader download 200 MB. I typically target between 130-160 Screenshots, this one was like 220.

1 hour ago, The First Lady of Hats said:

Length's all good, think yer hit that mystical sweet-spot with it.

 

And Stan did not loose his head, or get forced to wear a dunce's cap. Admit it, Nora's jus' a kitten really >:D

Thanks. As she said, it's just too much work to find new toys every time to play real serious. ;) 

 

24 minutes ago, death8981 said:

Another great entry... I love you... keep up your great work...?

Thanks :) 

 

1 minute ago, Lynx2k10 said:

What a lecher bitch ?

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

?

 

 

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I have no complain on the style of your story. Everything is perfect. The only thing that I wish is if it can be shorter. Somebody said once somewhere: It's not the quantity of the pictures that makes story pleasant to read, but quality. You have the quality and I'm talking about rare and the hell of the quality.

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2 hours ago, Jayomms said:

I agree with @Crw and the way you write an the style I didn't notice or realize how long it was til you mentioned it. :classic_laugh::classic_biggrin::mrgreen::thumbsup::wink: 

Thanks :)

28 minutes ago, Elf Prince said:

I have no complain on the style of your story. Everything is perfect. The only thing that I wish is if it can be shorter. Somebody said once somewhere: It's not the quantity of the pictures that makes story pleasant to read, but quality. You have the quality and I'm talking about rare and the hell of the quality.

I'm greedy, I want the quantity and the quality. It's hard to tell the same story the shorter, at least the way I'm doing it. Could I have used half the images? Yes probably, but it would have hurt the story overhaul. I can't really skip parts of the story as they are already all necessary and separating it in two parts would have been a bad choice, as explained in the end.  That's why I was asking, so I can adjust things for the entries in chapter 6. 

Thanks for your feedback :) .

 

 

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Mileena: Oh Nora, how excellent you are at controlling the lesser beings, reminds me of my younger days. Next time we meet up, I'll bring you a fresh new stable boy, that one is wasted on you. Be seeing you soon Sister...

 

Wow... ok you are one of the best at building up and then blowing it up in our faces. I thought Nora was gonna do far worser things to him, wow. Nora is badass and a bad ass xD 

 

Aria: Hey thats my joke!

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Beyond the fact it wasn't pragmatic to replace every stable boy she killed, I still enjoy throwing in that tension where you don't know if Nora is going to kill them or not, the thrill of winner takes all, with a dominate mistress is the best part about the sex in this series. Combine that with a plot and you get a sweet treat.  ?

 

 

As for pacing i don't see a problem with it I like the idea of cross politicization though, where the subplots play a sprinkle over the main narrative being told. Like saving an important figure in a side story, only for them to return for an important part in the narrative.. those are normally a good way to keep people engaged and try new things as well, provided you don't inundate your viewers with a lot of concepts that it even overwhelms yourself with. You get lots of world building, new characters to introduce, more lewdness... etc.  Keep going with what you're doing, but stop when you proof read and ask yourself "is this too much fluff?" Chances are if you get to that point you might want to just wrap up that segment and push the main story along further. 

 

 

Also, maybe i'm misreading it, but when Nora realized valentine washed and shaved the stable lad, do you think she (nora) was a bit jealous that valentine had her way with him first in terms of sex etc? Perhaps, valentine is just a sadist and likes abusing mortals, rather than mixing threats of death and abuse with pleasure like nora. Or they can be totally the same in their view in pleasure and blood, heh. ?

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In my opinion, the lengths of each section have been perfect. I also don't think length matters so much as "unnecessary space" does. For example, how many shots of a sex scene are really needed? I am probably in the minority with this opinion, but sex scenes shouldn't be the longest spoiler sections. That being said, you create some of the most uniquely choreographed "sex" scenes on here, and I don't think you should take away from that at all.

 

Excellent work in this section though! I definitely did not expect Nora to say "bootylicious". I laughed a little too hard at that point. And really nice idea with the theme for that scene. Taking punishment to a whole new level with that; "cum or die". Yikes! It didn't really feel like a conclusion to a whole chapter though. The chapter itself does feel concluded. Nora made great strides in her position and character after all. I don't know, maybe I was just expecting a cliff hanger or something.

 

Either way, keep it up! Chapter Six is gonna be even better! :D

 

 

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Another great chapter; you have a real talent for creating great quality scenes whilst also propagating a interesting story. The facial expressions and poses were executed perfectly and the text was neither underwhelming nor overbearing whilst the text-less images really speak for themselves - The text-less images advance the story whilst the character's expressions and body language and actions create a great combination to behold ? Well done.

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11 hours ago, Agent Tex said:

Mileena: Oh Nora, how excellent you are at controlling the lesser beings, reminds me of my younger days. Next time we meet up, I'll bring you a fresh new stable boy, that one is wasted on you. Be seeing you soon Sister...

 

Wow... ok you are one of the best at building up and then blowing it up in our faces. I thought Nora was gonna do far worser things to him, wow. Nora is badass and a bad ass xD 

 

Aria: Hey thats my joke!

Thank you Tex. I actually cut an additional part of the story last minute, where she is even more mean, but it didn't fit too well with the rest of the upcoming story and her relationship to her servants, so I cut it. Anyways the first part of the second half is already dabbling way to dangerously into some form of abuse, sexual or not, that depends on your standpoint. 

 

5 hours ago, TheLoneTremere said:

Beyond the fact it wasn't pragmatic to replace every stable boy she killed, I still enjoy throwing in that tension where you don't know if Nora is going to kill them or not, the thrill of winner takes all, with a dominate mistress is the best part about the sex in this series. Combine that with a plot and you get a sweet treat.  ?

 

 

As for pacing i don't see a problem with it I like the idea of cross politicization though, where the subplots play a sprinkle over the main narrative being told. Like saving an important figure in a side story, only for them to return for an important part in the narrative.. those are normally a good way to keep people engaged and try new things as well, provided you don't inundate your viewers with a lot of concepts that it even overwhelms yourself with. You get lots of world building, new characters to introduce, more lewdness... etc.  Keep going with what you're doing, but stop when you proof read and ask yourself "is this too much fluff?" Chances are if you get to that point you might want to just wrap up that segment and push the main story along further. 

 

 

Also, maybe i'm misreading it, but when Nora realized valentine washed and shaved the stable lad, do you think she (nora) was a bit jealous that valentine had her way with him first in terms of sex etc? Perhaps, valentine is just a sadist and likes abusing mortals, rather than mixing threats of death and abuse with pleasure like nora. Or they can be totally the same in their view in pleasure and blood, heh. ?

One of the reason why the tension works is because the danger is real. The girl in the last section was brutally murdered and eaten, so you never know, what the illminded author and the vampire lady do next ;) .

 

About the general story architecture: For the most part I just had one main plot, excpet for Amelie's story basically until mid chapter 5. With her own castle and an increased character cast I have more time and space for additional side plots/stories. The Fina story was already set up a bit, this entry sets something up and there's a more to come.

Also having these closed sections that basically tell their own short story have a lot of space for sexual content without hurting the main story. So the main plot can be a bit more story focused without the need to fit sex in everywhere. 

 

The idea of the Valentina comment was that Nora set everything already at the staple up, where you see her talk to Valentina in private for a minute. Nora just mentions it so the reader gets it to know as well. It's also kind of a foreshadowing for the sex, because why else would she care about the boy not being covered in dirt and sweat.

 

2 hours ago, Collygon said:

In my opinion, the lengths of each section have been perfect. I also don't think length matters so much as "unnecessary space" does. For example, how many shots of a sex scene are really needed? I am probably in the minority with this opinion, but sex scenes shouldn't be the longest spoiler sections. That being said, you create some of the most uniquely choreographed "sex" scenes on here, and I don't think you should take away from that at all.

 

Excellent work in this section though! I definitely did not expect Nora to say "bootylicious". I laughed a little too hard at that point. And really nice idea with the theme for that scene. Taking punishment to a whole new level with that; "cum or die". Yikes! It didn't really feel like a conclusion to a whole chapter though. The chapter itself does feel concluded. Nora made great strides in her position and character after all. I don't know, maybe I was just expecting a cliff hanger or something.

 

Either way, keep it up! Chapter Six is gonna be even better! :D

Thanks for your feedback Collygon. Technically you can almost always skip the sex scenes because they rarely advance the story in a meaningful way. It might be important that sex happend, but the order of positions, close up shots and all the dirty details are not. So technically you need one, maybe two. 

If you are writing erotica on the other hand sex and all the details do matter, they are one of the main focuses of the story and in the interest of the reader. So the questions on how many screenshots you need depends on whether you see yourself as a normal story or as a erotic (or porn) story.

 

Yeah the bootylicous thing was... I had something in mind that I wanted her to say, but I could not say it in English. I'm not sure why I settled on this word, probably because the alternatives would've been even more cringy . 

 

The chapter does not conclude, because the main plot basically concluded in section 4 or 5. The second half were basically short stories in Nora's universe. There'll be a proper story soon again and chapter 6 does have a proper ending. 

 

1 hour ago, UGNETCOS said:

Another great chapter; you have a real talent for creating great quality scenes whilst also propagating a interesting story. The facial expressions and poses were executed perfectly and the text was neither underwhelming nor overbearing whilst the text-less images really speak for themselves - The text-less images advance the story whilst the character's expressions and body language and actions create a great combination to behold ? Well done.

 

Thank you very much! I like using textless images, because I dislike the actual writing part ? . I mostly look at movies and TV series/shows when I think about the creation and the style of my story, which advance the plot a lot just via pictures. 

 

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Wov. You're become really good at building tension, and that was quite some innovative torture method. The worse being that with Nora, you never actually know if you're on her safe side until she decides to tell it to you. And all of that, always masterfully staged; lighted and posed. A fitting conclusion for a chapter 5 that indeed felt superior to the previous ones. Do not go back to less narrative events though, I know you're more into the feeling & atmosphere, but that's part of why that chapter 5 was better IMO. K5RIBNNq_o.gif

 

About the length, given the double fact you kept the reader entertained and that a lot of screens are read quite fast, it was not a problem from a reading perspective. No complaints about loading time either. From a story-teller point of view, some screens could've been skipped, but not that much everything all well considered. :classic_smile:

 

Malicia : « I want to become a baroness too ; so that I can have hot guys unzip their panties while I'm bossing them from the bed, yes. Smiley_ayuluna_HFR.gif »

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5 hours ago, Tirloque said:

Wov. You're become really good at building tension, and that was quite some innovative torture method. The worse being that with Nora, you never actually know if you're on her safe side until she decides to tell it to you. And all of that, always masterfully staged; lighted and posed. A fitting conclusion for a chapter 5 that indeed felt superior to the previous ones. Do not go back to less narrative events though, I know you're more into the feeling & atmosphere, but that's part of why that chapter 5 was better IMO. K5RIBNNq_o.gif

 

About the length, given the double fact you kept the reader entertained and that a lot of screens are read quite fast, it was not a problem from a reading perspective. No complaints about loading time either. From a story-teller point of view, some screens could've been skipped, but not that much everything all well considered. :classic_smile:

 

Thank you :), chapter 6 is going to have a story intensive block in the middle, but entries like this will still be part of the blog, but I get what you are trying to say :)

 

As already discussed in my reply to Collygon, a lot of the sex screenshots are unnecessary from a story perspective, instead they are just there for their own sake. But thanks for your feedback on the length. 

 

 

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12 hours ago, Alter Native said:

Thank you :), chapter 6 is going to have a story intensive block in the middle, but entries like this will still be part of the blog, but I get what you are trying to say :).

K5RIBNNq_o.gif

12 hours ago, Alter Native said:

As already discussed in my reply to Collygon, a lot of the sex screenshots are unnecessary from a story perspective, instead they are just there for their own sake. But thanks for your feedback on the length.

Maybe I didn't express myself precisely enougth.

 

Unless the story is really inexistent, sex scenes aren't a meaningless part of it. They're an event, and as such, developing them can bring something more to the story. Only thing dosing the length might be tricky. For example, when she's showing him her butt in front of the bookshelves, there are three shots that look very similar. Two might have been enough in that case, while still featuring that teasing event. On the contrary, when you depicted him going to spill the water bucket, the two shots on the bucket are necessary, as they give a sort of camera movement that do center the attention on the moving part of the scene.

 

So I'd go for a slight reduction of some too similar shots in sex scenes, while keeping the length exactly as is in narrative scenes. Smiley_henri_gaud-belin_HFR.gif

 

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6 hours ago, Tirloque said:

For example, when she's showing him her butt in front of the bookshelves, there are three shots that look very similar. Two might have been enough in that case, while still featuring that teasing event. On the contrary, when you depicted him going to spill the water bucket, the two shots on the bucket are necessary, as they give a sort of camera movement that do center the attention on the moving part of the scene.

 

So I'd go for a slight reduction of some too similar shots in sex scenes, while keeping the length exactly as is in narrative scenes. Smiley_henri_gaud-belin_HFR.gif

 

There is even the same image in the end and the beginning of the story. I agree 100% percent with your point and I am well aware of this, since I face it during the writing of every section.

But, you know, for an entry like this I have between 1500-2000 screenshots and around 6-10 to choose per pose and sometimes you just want to include all of them... and dat ass certainly deserved the extra screenshot. ?

 

 

 

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I really liked that chapter (as always :D ). 

Regarding the length I have no problem at all with some longer entries. ?

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18 hours ago, bodabira 01 said:

I really liked that chapter (as always :D ). 

Regarding the length I have no problem at all with some longer entries. ?

Thanks bodabira :) 

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