Hey, it's Destana again.  Despite having a generally bad time in Solitude, I decided to go back.  You know those times when something goes really right (even against very bad odds) for somebody who's completely mad and they judge it to be the will of the gods that they performed the action that led them down that path?  This could've been that moment for me.  In a sense.  This is a stealth mission. 

 

When I woke up (it was before the farmer and his wife awoke) I threw on my gauntlets and boots.  My body armor was somewhere in one of the ruins.  And most of my odds and ends were in Solitude Prison.  My reason for going back wasn't just to get my gear though.  It wasn't just a test of my stealth skills now (though I viewed it that way).  I wanted the damned Jailer dead.  I grabbed a set of basic clothes, some gold and some food from the farmer (sorry farmer).  Then I headed back to Solitude.  It took another day or so to travel there, but I knew the landmarks so it seemed quicker this time.  By the time I got there it was early in the morning.  Which, as a thief, was a great time to be doing what I was going to be doing.  

 

I scoped out the city itself - on a great arch.  I thought to myself it might be possible to scale the side and get in via the wall.  I would just need rope to make rope arrows.  I walked along the path between the city and the East Empire docks until I saw a small opening, which... led to a door.  This had promise.  I grinned, swallowing and steeling myself.  It was locked, with a fairly difficult lock, taking me about an hour and at least 20 lockpicks breaking in the lock before I got in (good practice).  I climbed up to find I was inside a tower on the wall.  I walked up the stairs and I was on a small bridge between the wall and the castle.  Really?  This is the security in this place?  Anyway, I jumped down onto the wall, nearly losing my balance, then slinked over to the back of Radiant Raiment.  The roof was butted up against the wall, so it was easy.

 

"Hey, how's it going?" One guard said to another, and I darted to the back of Radiant Raiment's roof.  

"Oh, you know.  The waiting.  It's sooo boring," the other guard said.

 

I weighed my options.  I opened up my journal and remembered what had brought me here in the first place.  

1.  Retrieve the Copper and Moonstone Circlet from Radiant Raiment.  Okay.  That would be easy.  I would wait for the guards to patrol away and I'd pick the lock and do the deed.  The door was barely locked.  The first thing I noted when I entered was voices coming from upstairs.  Okay, not so easy.  I searched downstairs, grabbing some fine clothing and finding a challenging lockbox to pick with 400 gold inside.  Then I found the circlet.  About this time the denizens had gone to sleep and I figured I shouldn't press my luck any further.  As I exited, a guard stood maybe a dozen feet away with his back to me.  So I reentered the house and looked at my next quest target.

2.  Get a Jeweled Flagon in Addvar's House.  By my map it looked like that was halfway across town.  I threw together some rope and arrows and made rope arrows (!) to get back up on the roof.  I jumped to Bits and Pieces, then back on the wall, over the bridge and across more wall.   I looked across the courtyard.  It was going to be a hell of a jump to reach the catacombs entrance building, and then to the triplex that included Addvar's house.  I looked around, then dropped and rushed across the yard, flattening against the walls.  I could see the guards' torches, which gave them away, so it wasn't a difficult prospect to avoid them.  Addvar's lock popped open (I was getting good at this now) and I walked in.  Greta and Addvar were fast asleep in the upstairs bed, so I took what I needed as well as all the valuables, and stealthily walked out the front door.

3.  Next target.  Erikur's house is right next to here.  I flipped deeper in my quest log and remembered where I saw his name.  He was a Sweep job target, and he'd forced himself on me while I was incarcerated in the Blue Palace.  I weighed my options.  I could steal the things Vex wanted, but if I killed him I wouldn't get anything.  And the screaming.  It would alert guards.  Besides, he wasn't the real problem here.  It was the system itself.  As I approached his house, I noted he had a backdoor.  I decided I would do this in style.  Then I noticed he had a balcony with a door to his second floor.  REAL style.  I jumped up and picked the lock (again, easy) and stepped inside.  First I went to the third floor and looted what I could.  I spied a couple having sex and didn't disturb.  (Not Erikur, who are these people)?  I made my way around the house, finally finding Erikur's room on the first floor and shut the door behind me.  I waited there for several moments, thinking of the things I could do to him right now.  I looted his room.

 

Finally I settled on something. 

First, I bound and gagged him in his sleep.  "Mmmmph?" He struggled, but I brought lots of rope.

I got on top of him and did the same thing those men had done to me: used him to give me an orgasm and left him there, tied and naked.  He was trying to shout for guards but my gagging technique was pretty good.  I had to retie him, but I hoped it would hold at least until I did my non-quest related business in the castle.  To be honest, I can't say it was one of my finer moments.  I also can't say he didn't enjoy it (unlike most of my experiences with the opposite).  It was more of a power thing.

 

I stepped out again, feeling like I was beating the system now.  A guard turned a corner, and I rolled forward (I'd just learned how to roll in stealth) and slipped in the (unlocked??) backdoor to the Bards' College.  Several people were up and about in the college and I just casually walked around, acting like I belonged. 

Their leader, Viarmo, accosted me as I passed through the large common room, "Are you here to study the ways of the bard?"

I squinted, then I said, "Uh.. yeah.  I've always wanted to play music."

"Well, all you need to do at this time is get an instrument and play.  Feel free to take one of the lutes from the room here.  Come back to me when you're a little more experienced and we can talk about your entry," he smirked.  I wasn't sure how to take that at the moment, but I had a mission to do, so I just nodded and grabbed a lute, throwing it in my pack.  Maybe It'd fetch a good price.

 

From there I used another rope arrow to scale the wall, sneaking all the way.  I dropped down to a balcony, door leading adjacent to the courtyard.  I waited for the guards' torches to pass again and snuck on the edge of the courtyard to Castle Dour entrance.  Not remembering which way the dungeon was, but finding the castle unusually unguarded, I picked right.

As I stealthed down the stairs, I found... guards.  This was a barracks.  But... they were all sleeping.  Not even a watch?

 

I wondered at that moment if somebody above was watching over me... or below.  I decided I would ride the wave and walked through a gate and to a chest I'd seen from the door.  Locked, very difficult?  Must be something very good inside.  After several minutes of fumbling (honestly, all it takes is time and a vast supply of lockpicks, I'd been looting them as I went)... the chest had Imperial Dragon Armor in it.  Heavy armor, not my style.  But... on my body was a good a place as any until it was time to sell it.  And, a sword!  Dragon's Oath.  I picked it up and equipped it immediately.  This would be my main sword for a while.  

 

I went back up the stairs and down the opposite side into the dungeon this time.  The pattern of clean stone turned into dingy dungeon and I knew I'd made it.  I turned right, dodging an Imperial Soldier around a stone structure.  I followed the ring and down the stairs to the holding room where they'd first stripped me and put my gear in a chest.  

"HEY!  I know you!" The guard in the holding room shouted.

Scanning the room, the jailer was nowhere to be found.  I thought over my options for a split second. 

Not thinking of intimidating the guard into telling me where the jailer was, I said back, "You're making a mistake."

"There is no mistake. you are a wanted man and it's time for you to pay for your crimes."

"I'm a woman!  And I don't have time for this, do you?"

"You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people. What say you in your defense?" The Guard asked.

I stroked my chin for a second, then said, "I'm the Jarl's Thane. I demand you let me go at once?"

"Oh, forgive me.... wait a minute!" The guard drew his sword, "You're no thane!"

"Damn.  Deception failed," I said, "Ah!  I'm with the Guild. Is this enough to clear my bounty?"

"I can make all your problems with the guards go away. But it'll cost you. 100 gold. What do you say?"

"Fine," I handed him some of my ill-gotten gold.  He turned back to what he was doing at the long table, going through evidence.

Immediately, my face lit up with glee.  This was Saturalia in Sun's Height.  He turned to the table.  I crouched.  I brought up Dragon's Oath and stabbed the man in the back three times and he crumpled.  I took back my gold and his as well.  

I stood and spat on him.  It was hard to tell with these guys, but I was 99% sure that was the guy that brought me in and gave me to the Jailer.  Even if it wasn't this system was broken and I was enraged by the guards' indifference.  I went back and down the stairs to the lower level, where I'd been held.  Rather than how packed by guards this prison had been when I was being held here, it seemed nearly empty now.  Maybe because it was 4 in the morning?  One imperial soldier sat on a chair at the middle of the circle, watching the one prisoner still here from my sentence.  The one they'd forced to watch me getting raped.

"I stand with Ulfric Stormcloak!  You Imperial dogs will never get a word out of me!" She shouted.  Fiery.  I liked this one.

I crept over to her bars.  I reached out for the door, but there didn't seem to be any knob?  Was it broken off?  I blinked.  I could not open it.  After pondering for a moment, I had another idea.

"Hey, I have a gift for you," I said to her through the bars.

She looked up at me.

I slipped one of my steel daggers silently into the hay on her side, and a lockpick.  

"Make your own decision.  I like your passion," I smiled.

I decided I had it with the sneaking and walked over behind the sleeping guard and stabbed him in the throat.  My ledger is dripping with blood now.  I figured I might as well peer into some of the other cells.  All empty of people, but one of them had a curious note, reading:  "Fifteen men, a sunken treasure, and a lost ship. That's what I left behind.  It took less than a day to sail to Blackbone Isle..."  I pocketed it.

I sat down for a minute.  That Jailer, he hadn't been in the jail.  I hadn't seen him in the town.  I hadn't seen him in the castle.  I wanted to scream.  Did he travel around and 'rehabilitate' prisoners in all the holds?  I sighed, ready to be out of here.  I gathered up my things to make an exit.  Stealth stealth stealth... I stepped out into the courtyard. 

'Wait what time is it?' I thought.  I noticed the sun was rising over Nirn.

"You've committed..."

Dammit.  I drew my weapons.  Two imperial soldiers flanked me.  And drew their swords.  And it wasn't going to be long before they noticed I was wearing EXPENSIVE imperial armor that I'd stole.  This was going to be less of a 'thinking fast' than 'running fast' exercise.  

"I'd rather die than go to prison!" I shouted, rolling out of the way of their attacks.  I dropped all pretense at stealth and sprinted to my right, which I knew led toward the gate.

Arrows flew as I dodged left and right.  Two hold guards were coming up the ramp to my left so I jumped over the low wall and sprinted to the side gate, more soldiers piling on by the moment.  I flew past the gate guards, past the wall. 

I figured I could add another crime here and help my getaway, so I hopped on a light brown horse and spurred it on until I was out of the country.  When I was finally far enough away that noone would touch me, I dismounted and fell on my back.  

"I can't believe I fucking pulled that off!" I screamed.  Some Aedra or Daedra out there must be watching over me. 

I'd been up all night so I decided I would get off the road and make camp.  Late that evening I awoke to find the horse had wandered off, but I was rested and ready to face the day.  What to do now?  Go back to Riften and fence?  Or double down?

A mixed answer.  I didn't care about Morthal.  I decided that the Shill and Numbers jobs in Morthal would have to wait.  Like a gambler deciding to push her winning streak, I was going to Windhelm to hear about this Ulfric Stormcloak everyone was talking about (and to commit more crimes, of course).

 

As a side note, the last picture in the collage is me now, just chilling in Windstad Manor.  Waiting.  It's the waiting that drives me nuts.  I want to be out there, doing things.  But for now I'm stuck.  Not going to make the same mistake as my first preg....  Nevermind.  Forget I said anything.  So you know my bounty in Solutide doesn't last forever.  But for the longest time I avoid Solitude like the plague.  Yes, I do have a lot of tattoos now.  I will get to that.