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Tabrielle — Mourning White Chapter 7

 

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Below is the seventh chapter of the story of Benor and Tabrielle, a.k.a. the « White-ash» ; told by the latter.


Having barely escaped from the disaster of Kolskeggr mine, Benor now follows the trail of blood left by the Forworn. Will he be able to find Tabrielle before her wounds prove fatal ?

 

As announced beforehand, the tone and themes of the story are different the other sisters' chronicles ; often darker and more violent. If you find something too disturbing to you, just skip to the next spoiler.

This chapter is also rather dark (literally ^^), so make sure to adjust your monitor/ambient lighting accordingly.

I've also implemented some format changes, a chocolate medal for the one who'll guess where I started. ^^

 

Previous chapter is a highly recommended read if you wanna understand something of what's going on. You'll also find summaries & character sheets in the main menu, in case you need a memory refresh :

 

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Likes and comments are welcome and keep me motivated, so if you want to see more chronicles you know what to do ! :classic_wink:

 

In the previous episode :

 

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Chapter VII

 

Part I

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Part II

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Ohh what have we here, Tirloque posted something, that took some time 🤗

 

It seems the tragic ending was avoided 🤔, curious.

 

I expected her to be dead and Malicia with her magical horses banish Urunach out of existence.

 

But based on things, we ain't gonna se the strongest sister's horse magic. 🧐

 

Tabit got some interesting ability, but how come this ability don't got drained by Urunach's ability? 

 

Also that fanservice buttshot 😜, I was worried we get another sex scene just with the draugr. 😏

 

Now joke aisde, I noticing the lack of mental effect of the trauma? She did got raped, humiliated and her pride got utterly crushed.. 

 

Body restored and healed is one thing, but she seems shrugged of the entire thing like nothing happened. 🤔

 

Look forward the next one in 3 months.

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:O A new entry!

Wow, you really let them stumbling from one misfortune to the next... even though I didn't think this entry was darker than the other ones of this series. 

 

Great job with the action scenes, the posing is great already and the added effects do help indeed. 

I'd personally prefer a bit thicker black borders to tell the images better apart, but I certainly see the advantages of having these smaller borders to give you more space for your screenshots which is something I always appreciate. 

Also the dark speech bubbles work really well by not attracting too much attention from the reader by poping out too much due to their white color in the dark background. 

 

Good job, keep it up!

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OMG!  SHe's NOT DEAD!  I was drinking for weeks... trying to get over her.  Now She's Back!  Also semi-immortal.  Sweet! 🙂 Demi-Gods are hot.  

 

Had some good effects here that I'm scratching my head about, Benor w/ with green trail (I have an idea how you did it), the fusrodahmehameha lock, and the yelling Draugr pic (the pose alone must have taken a few shots to nail down).  Good job on them!  

 

This entry was lighter than the previous one entry and a good change of pace to start the new year.  I wonder what'll happen next!  

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4 hours ago, Tirloque said:

Blog entry publish notification (in case the forum didn't send you one) :

:classic_unsure: It didn't

 

:classic_happy: Glad, that magic saved her

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God damned Highlanders coming over here and taking away jobs from hard working Americans with their newfangled immortality!

Spoiler



 

 

If I can be uncharacteristically serious for just a second you did spend quite a bit of time defending your last chapter by saying you wished to show the psychological elements of having your character raped and beaten and the mental and not just physical or prurient elements. You even said "However, I'd like you to think about one thing : in your opinion, of the fiction who describes the rape as a trauma, and of the one that gets over it like nothing happened, which one is the more opposed to it ?" And yet here we have the heroine very much acting like nothing happened, even cracking jokes and talking about romance practically minutes later.  It does seem a bit jarring when viewed in the same sitting as your last chapter and ESPECIALLY when framed by your statements about that chapter.

 

I think part of what rubbed a lot of people the wrong way about that chapter was that you seemed to want to "have your cake and eat it too"- to have the rape content that even you acknowledge is far from rare on LL and absolutely appeals to many people on a purely base level but then to also turn around and say something to the effect of "oh well I'm not like THOSE people doing it! When I do it it's serious and meant to show the character's emotions and trauma" and I think this follow up furthers that appearance by very much having Tabrielle act the part of the standard LL gal who shrugs off the worst of rapes like a broken nail. I think going all in in either direction can have its place but trying to please all of the people all of the time seldom works. 

 

As long as I'm already on your bad side with these last few paragraphs let me just throw in that some better textures for that Draugr's armor sure wouldn't hurt anybody 😉.

 

The effects are great (Benor being thrown in particular is very good, the frame with the Draugr's back to the audience has some of the best motion blur I have seen on LL) and the comic style is as good as always! I especially like how you use the dragon language for the shouts. 

 

Now that I've gotten all that terrible seriousness out of the way- last time you posted a story we managed to snark some crap straight out of the blog section! Who should we do next? I have some ideas 🤔...

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Whew, long ass post here. I'm going to part it somehow. Smileyf-mylittlekony-HFR.jpg


RESDAYN the saucy, yes

Spoiler

 

7 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Ohh what have we here, Tirloque posted something, that took some time 🤗

 

It seems the tragic ending was avoided 🤔, curious.

 

I expected her to be dead and Malicia with her magical horses banish Urunach out of existence.

 

Well she died actually. Good to know the story managed to surprise you a bit. :smiley:

7 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Tabit got some interesting ability, but how come this ability don't got drained by Urunach's ability?

Urunach's darkness marble doesn't drains magicka, it drains lights. Yet to survive within in, you DO need lights. And as the draining effect goes stronger and and stronger, it becomes effectively draining for the mage him/herself.

 

Also Tabi's ability isn't magicka dependent. It takes effect while she's dead, which by definition is a moment where her magicka is zero anyway. It doesn't requires any action from her, aside from acquiring additional lives.

7 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Also that fanservice buttshot 😜, I was worried we get another sex scene just with the draugr. 😏

Well I did have an unexpected collaboration with Forshare, maybe that left some marks. ^^

 

As for that moment, it's certainly a bit fanservicing, though you do in fact see more of her when she wakes up at the start. And it was way more fan-service without the edit. ^^It was also the occasion to develop a bit her personality and JØlkas' as an opponents who'd rather fight fair and square than make use of every opening.

7 hours ago, Resdayn said:

I expected her to be dead and Malicia with her magical horses banish Urunach out of existence.

 

But based on things, we ain't gonna se the strongest sister's horse magic. 🧐

 

Look forward the next one in 3 months.

Malicia : « You're very cheeky about that 3 months thingie, uh. Maybe that's 'cause you're very jealous, yes. :classic_shy:

 

                And I've got no horse magic either, even though it's true I'm the strongest, prettiest and most intelligent Marsoric. :classic_sleepy: »

 

ALTER NATIVE

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6 hours ago, Alter Native said:

:O A new entry!

Wow, you really let them stumbling from one misfortune to the next... even though I didn't think this entry was darker than the other ones of this series.

It's way lighter than the previous one, sort of a homecoming. Still, what happened, happened and left scars. As for misfortunes, JØlkas is indeed one opponent one would not want to face. And though he's still on a scale way below Urunach's one, they're not out of there yet.

6 hours ago, Alter Native said:

Great job with the action scenes, the posing is great already and the added effects do help indeed. 

I'd personally prefer a bit thicker black borders to tell the images better apart, but I certainly see the advantages of having these smaller borders to give you more space for your screenshots which is something I always appreciate. 

Also the dark speech bubbles work really well by not attracting too much attention from the reader by poping out too much due to their white color in the dark background. 

 

Good job, keep it up!

I'm glad the effects and screens are appreciated, both took their amount of effort. As for the comic layout, I indeed went for thinner borders most of the time, but those aren't a fixed variable. You have some boards with thicker horizontal borders, and some with no borders at all. And I indeed prefer darker bubbles most of the time.


Thanks for the good words, Alter. Smiley_jap_HFR.gif

 

DJREGS

Spoiler

 

4 hours ago, djregs said:

OMG!  SHe's NOT DEAD!  I was drinking for weeks... trying to get over her.  Now She's Back!  Also semi-immortal.  Sweet! 🙂 Demi-Gods are hot. 

 

Well, at the moment her gift allowed her to survive despite sacrificing herself to save Benor. Yet, she doesn't feels like a demigod. As she stated, contrary to her father, the additional lives do not mean additional magicka to her.

 

Dunno if you felt really surprised but I'm glad you liked. :classic_biggrin:

4 hours ago, djregs said:

Had some good effects here that I'm scratching my head about, Benor w/ with green trail (I have an idea how you did it), the fusrodahmehameha lock, and the yelling Draugr pic (the pose alone must have taken a few shots to nail down).  Good job on them! 

I'm a fanatic of the tfc 1 Japanese tourist style, and the draugrs do consistently open their mouth before shouting, so it wasn't that hard. As for the Fusrodahmeha and Benor's effects (I'm not sure which one you're referring to) it's mostly photoshop effects (smoke + blur mainly). :classic_smile:

4 hours ago, djregs said:

This entry was lighter than the previous one entry and a good change of pace to start the new year.  I wonder what'll happen next!  

Thanks for your appreciation, Djregs ! :smiley:


WORIK

Spoiler

 

3 hours ago, worik said:

:classic_unsure: It didn't

 

:classic_happy: Glad, that magic saved her

 

Well that's the most effective work-around I came with to overcome the notifications bug. It's a bit time consuming though. Smiley_whistle_HFR.gif

 

As for Tabrielle, she somewhat hides her abilities at first, but this one allows her to still stay the course despite her weaknesses. I'm happy that's well received. :classic_wink:

 

 

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29 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

Urunach's darkness marble doesn't drains magicka, it drains lights. Yet to survive within in, you DO need lights. And as the draining effect goes stronger and and stronger, it becomes effectively draining for the mage him/herself.

 

Also Tabi's ability isn't magicka dependent. It takes effect while she's dead, which by definition is a moment where her magicka is zero anyway. It doesn't requires any action from her, aside from acquiring additional lives.

 

You mean, someone need just toss a sun to him? 😇

 

Certain holy magic, fire magic and someone would be a very solid match up then, her also need change his armour to a lamp. 🤭

 

Quite interesting to hear about his hoax before the final fight.

32 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

 

As for that moment, it's certainly a bit fanservicing, though you do in fact see more of her when she wakes up at the start. And it was way more fan-service without the edit. ^^It was also the occasion to develop a bit her personality and JØlkas' as an opponents who'd rather fight fair and square than make use of every opening.

Malicia : « You're very cheeky about that 3 months thingie, uh. Maybe that's 'cause you're very jealous, yes. :classic_shy:

Even if we see more of her in the beginning, context wise make perfect sense 😜

 

She make quite a buttshots for ancient death lords a lot, maybe some darker influence of the blog section influence her beyond Nirm 😇

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38 minutes ago, SpyVsPie said:

God damned Highlanders coming over here and taking away jobs from hard working Americans with their newfangled immortality!

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

 

 

 

If I can be uncharacteristically serious for just a second you did spend quite a bit of time defending your last chapter by saying you wished to show the psychological elements of having your character raped and beaten and the mental and not just physical or prurient elements. You even said "However, I'd like you to think about one thing : in your opinion, of the fiction who describes the rape as a trauma, and of the one that gets over it like nothing happened, which one is the more opposed to it ?" And yet here we have the heroine very much acting like nothing happened, even cracking jokes and talking about romance practically minutes later.  It does seem a bit jarring when viewed in the same sitting as your last chapter and ESPECIALLY when framed by your statements about that chapter.

 

I think part of what rubbed a lot of people the wrong way about that chapter was that you seemed to want to "have your cake and eat it too"- to have the rape content that even you acknowledge is far from rare on LL and absolutely appeals to many people on a purely base level but then to also turn around and say something to the effect of "oh well I'm not like THOSE people doing it! When I do it it's serious and meant to show the character's emotions and trauma" and I think this follow up furthers that appearance by very much having Tabrielle act the part of the standard LL gal who shrugs off the worst of rapes like a broken nail. I think going all in in either direction can have its place but trying to please all of the people all of the time seldom works.

I'm glad you underlined the topic.

 

Indeed, shrugging off the consequences of a rape could very much look like negating them. Get raped, continue living and fighting normally as if nothing happened. I've also seen some "LL gals" rape their opponents (while technically offering themselves to them) in return just after beating them the very moment the rape ended in the first place, which seems like total nonsense to me.

 

Now, you may have misread Tabrielle's state. Let's take a closer look to a rape's consequences :

  • Physical immediate consequences : injuries, physical danger and so on. The first thing which happened after her rape was her being stabbed, then killed. Her particularities here allowed here to pretty much negate all of the physical injuries she had though, so it doesn't show. But for any other woman than her that raped would've meant certain death.
  • Physical delayed consequences : pregnancy, sexual infections. She stayed dead for some moment here and she mentioned at some point she took potion-pills made by Malicia, so pregnancy isn't an issue. It's too early to tell about the rest.
  • Psychological consequences : I'm not sure if you considered the way she rated her behavior as a warrior, as a mage, as a woman, and as a justicer. But that's pretty much all she was aiming to be. I'm not sure you noted what she advised to Benor they should do against Urunach, nor what she answered when he said to her the fight wasn't over. But that's clearly not the Tabrielle who was being turned on by Benor's heroic speech while they were camping during their travel. Chapter 8 (and in fact most of the others) is already written, and will highlight it better, but if you think there were no psychological consequences either I've not given enough clues, either you've read a bit fast. But there are consequences, and they are quite severe. It's the very first time you see her having a fit of anger btw, that sole fact is another clue.

As for why she isn't just crying and unable to fight, well it's hinted it's not the first time it happened (though clearly one of the most violent), and when having faced something dreaded you can also have quite ferocious reactions. The lighning bolt that one shot a draugr head was the one of someone who was caught naked while still being angry of having been raped, and reacted for it not to happen again right away (compare to the one eaten by JØlkas if needed).

 

Same for her straight reacting to Benor's arrival : she had sacrificed one live for him NOT to get killed, the possibility of her not trying to prevent him falling into the trap didn't even cross her mind. She sacrificed almost everything for him to stay alive.  And that utmost priority feeling is what drives still her after her anger fit dissipated. Then one nail chases away another, and events are happening too fast for them to think over themselves, but don't think there isn't, that is just straight out wrong. 

 

38 minutes ago, SpyVsPie said:

As long as I'm already on your bad side with these last few paragraphs let me just throw in that some better textures for that Draugr's armor sure wouldn't hurt anybody 😉.

You're certainly right about that one. But it's all in the box now. So it's too late for a third reshoot. ^^

38 minutes ago, SpyVsPie said:

God damned Highlanders coming over here and taking away jobs from hard working Americans with their newfangled immortality!

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

 

 

 

 

Quality reference, and certain influence indeed !

 

 

38 minutes ago, SpyVsPie said:

The effects are great (Benor being thrown in particular is very good, the frame with the Draugr's back to the audience has some of the best motion blur I have seen on LL) and the comic style is as good as always! I especially like how you use the dragon language for the shouts.

I'm particularly found of JØlkas's first fusrodah indeed. I wanted to highlight the bruteforce of the shockwave, while the imposing back of the thu'um user standing still illustrate's his unmoving strength on the contrary. The photoshopping also feels satisfying, while the fursrodahmeha clashing felt somewhat less successful to me.  🤔

38 minutes ago, SpyVsPie said:

Now that I've gotten all that terrible seriousness out of the way- last time you posted a story we managed to snark some crap straight out of the blog section! Who should we do next? I have some ideas 🤔...

You're joking but even though we didn't mention anyone directly the concerned user received the message straight. So I didn't feel too proud after that one. Were here to incite people to improve rather than to stop. :classic_tongue:

 

 

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56 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

I'm glad you underlined the topic.

 

Indeed, shrugging off the consequences of a rape could very much look like negating them. Get raped, continue living and fighting normally as if nothing happened. I've also seen some "LL gals" rape their opponents (while technically offering themselves to them) in return just after beating them the very moment the rape ended in the first place, which seems like total nonsense to me.

 

If we start cataloging things on here that seem like total nonsense it will get way too depressing 😩.

 

56 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

Now, you may have misread Tabrielle's state. Let's take a closer look to a rape's consequences :

  • Physical immediate consequences : injuries, physical danger and so on. The first thing which happened after her rape was her being stabbed, then killed. Her particularities here allowed here to pretty much negate all of the physical injuries she had though, so it doesn't show. But for any other woman than her that raped would've meant certain death.
  • Physical delayed consequences : pregnancy, sexual infections. She stayed dead for some moment here and she mentioned at some point she took potion-pills made by Malicia, so pregnancy isn't an issue. It's too early to tell about the rest.
  • Psychological consequences : I'm not sure if you considered the way she rated her behavior as a warrior, as a mage, as a woman, and as a justicer. But that's pretty much all she was aiming to be. I'm not sure you noted what she advised to Benor they should do against Urunach, nor what she answered when he said to her the fight wasn't over. But that's clearly not the Tabrielle who was being turned on by Benor's heroic speech while they were camping during their travel. Chapter 8 (and in fact most of the others) is already written, and will highlight it better, but if you think there were no psychological consequences either I've not given enough clues, either you've read a bit fast. But there are consequences, and they are quite severe. It's the very first time you see her having a fit of anger btw, that sole fact is another clue.

 

Well the physical and delayed consequences are explained by magic and the timeframe so of course no one is questioning any of that, nor can anyone but you know what the future holds so we can only go by what we see here. Certainly she comes across as angry at the draugr (who are mindless undead monstrosities who want to kill her so anger is not really an inappropriate reaction for anyone) and of course she is upset but she has also just been literally murdered and thrown in a pit. To me it doesn't seem like anything she does would have seemed out of place in the story without the rape scene having occurred at all which is the only reason I brought it up at all. I think something like showing her lashing out at Benor would have been very out of character and jarring and really highlighted that her frame of mind was not alright but of course our stories are our own and they are ours to tell so that's just my two cents. 

I do think that one of your greatest strengths throughout the Malicia centered tales has been your juxtaposition of reality vs. Malicia's retelling of it (which in many cases DOES come across very much as her way of dealing with trauma and is very well done). Here we have a bit of Tabrielle's thoughts in the intro and a bit more at the end related to how to defeat the Draugr but I think maybe adding more throughout the middle section could have gone a long way towards showing more of the contrast between what she has to do or say to survive or to act strong for Benor vs. what she is really thinking or feeling inside at that moment. Like with anything this is all just my opinion and we all know what they say about those 😉. In the past you have offered criticism of some of the choices I have made in my own stories and at the time I strongly disagreed with them but as I thought on it I changed my mind and it influenced decisions I made moving forward. That's really the only reason I said anything- I don't believe anything you did with your story is "wrong" (nor can anything creative really be called wrong to begin with) but sometimes other takes on something can just give us something to think about.

 

56 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

I'm particularly found of JØlkas's first fusrodah indeed. I wanted to highlight the bruteforce of the shockwave, while the imposing back of the thu'um user standing still illustrate's his unmoving strength on the contrary. The photoshopping also feels satisfying, while the fursrodahmeha clashing felt somewhat less successful to me.  🤔

 

 

Yes the way he is only slightly blurred while everything else is heavily blurred conveys that perfectly and the shot overall is framed very well. Definitely up there at WANOBI levels 🤣 (Speaking of which looking over that wardrobe malfunction scene here I think maybe I wasn't the only one who was revisiting Abuse of Authority recently 🤔). The clash was good too and didn't seem poorly done or anything like that.

 

56 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

Were here to incite people to improve rather than to stop. :classic_tongue:

 

Sometimes stopping is a huge improvement. 

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First of all - WOOHOO! Go Tabi! Though as I stated in the last chapter, I had suspicions that she was alive it was still very good to get a confirmation of it! 🤗 (I even guessed correctly that something drastic and magical would have to happen for her to recover 😋)

 

I can see that this chapter might bring even more controversy than your previous one, so I'll try to give you my take on it. From Tabi's narration it sounds like this is not the first (or even second or third) time she has died. And though it's possible this is the first that she's been raped, the notion of being broken (physically) and defeated does not seem to be alien to her. It also feels that she adopts a sort of soldier mentality in such cases : deal with the situation and get out of the immediate danger first, process everything that happened and let your emotions flow - second, once everyone is safe.  It wouldn't surprise me if in the later episodes when they are out of those caverns Tabi will have bouts of nightmares, self-loathing and fits of anger.  (By the way, Benor seems to know about Tabi's resurrection ability? He was obviously worried about her but not completely devastated by the situation).

 

Your effects keep on improving more and more with every entry (how is that even possible? They are already absolutely gorgeous to begin with!). Jolkass regenerating his arm back looked especially great! And his blushing at Tabi's predicament with her skirt was just too adorable! 🤣 I also wonder if he perhaps considers her a true warrior due to her Thu'um ability and treats her as such, giving her the time to get dressed and compose herself.  Still, his regeneration coupled with his battle prowess and dragon shouts will prove to be quite a challenge for our brave duo.

 

I'm also curious if you ever watched the show Supernatural. A similar 'self-resurrection' technique was used by one of the characters and it is a rather clever idea.

Anyway - great job and this episode was certainly worth the wait! (I want more...can we have more please?! 🥰)

 

As always, thank you for your wonderful stories. They are always a great pleasure to read! 🤗

 

 

 

 

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Great work on explaining Tabi's ability. ;):thumbsup: I was gonna to something similar with Maylin. Something's like.... You'll see. :) I've been working in building fabrication so I have less time now. And the job has been rough drilling into metal all day. I hurt my knees, arms and hands but my knees more than anything. I was finally able to see a doctor about it and got it taken care of. What a hell of a month... it was good exercise least. :sweat_smile:    

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RESDAYN

Spoiler
13 hours ago, Resdayn said:

You mean, someone need just toss a sun to him? 😇

 

Certain holy magic, fire magic and someone would be a very solid match up then, her also need change his armour to a lamp. 🤭

 

Quite interesting to hear about his hoax before the final fight.

Having a lightsource isn't enough to beat him, it is required to have a chance to do so. He isn't really undead either, as the ritual of the heart change is one involving the forces of nature. That being said, I believe Gauis would be a solid match-up to everyone, if he's the one you're thinking to. But Urunach  isn't a hoax, he just doesn't see why he'd help his opponents to understand the mistakes not to do against him. Thus the rumors about him defeating whole squads without receiving a single hit. Yet, while that might've happened, I don't believe we saw him when he's really serious.  :classic_smile:

13 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Even if we see more of her in the beginning, context wise make perfect sense 😜

 

She make quite a buttshots for ancient death lords a lot, maybe some darker influence of the blog section influence her beyond Nirm 😇

Well, I even censored some bits at the start to avoid them averting the show from the topic at hand. ^^

 

But yeah, the skirt flying was an intentional lighthearted fanservice moment as well as a small critic to what should realistically happen to warriors fighting in light apparel in such moments. :classic_biggrin:

 

SPYVSPIE who's very good at telling who's the best

Spoiler
12 hours ago, SpyVsPie said:

Well the physical and delayed consequences are explained by magic and the timeframe so of course no one is questioning any of that, nor can anyone but you know what the future holds so we can only go by what we see here. Certainly she comes across as angry at the draugr (who are mindless undead monstrosities who want to kill her so anger is not really an inappropriate reaction for anyone) and of course she is upset but she has also just been literally murdered and thrown in a pit. To me it doesn't seem like anything she does would have seemed out of place in the story without the rape scene having occurred at all which is the only reason I brought it up at all. I think something like showing her lashing out at Benor would have been very out of character and jarring and really highlighted that her frame of mind was not alright but of course our stories are our own and they are ours to tell so that's just my two cents.

I get your point.

 

I probably could've handled things better. However I disagree on the fact I didn't handle them at all :

  • This scene wouldn't have had the same intensity/length/content without the rape.
  • She did lash out at Benor. Yelling and scolding, even though it was brief, isn't in her usual character. Talk about a welcome to someone coming to your rescue as well. :classic_tongue:

My second point will be that the necessities of the moment to delay the full consequences of the trauma : even you're in deep sorrow/self loathing and that you see a spider the size of a hand getting close to your head, chances are your priorities will be reorganized in a matter of seconds. ^^ That doesn't mean there won't be more consequences (as I said chapter 8 is already in the box). I believe most of them are hinted.

 

Now Tabrielle is a strong willed characted, and she's still clinging to the same hope which allowed her to endure the whole ordeal.

12 hours ago, SpyVsPie said:

I do think that one of your greatest strengths throughout the Malicia centered tales has been your juxtaposition of reality vs. Malicia's retelling of it (which in many cases DOES come across very much as her way of dealing with trauma and is very well done). Here we have a bit of Tabrielle's thoughts in the intro and a bit more at the end related to how to defeat the Draugr but I think maybe adding more throughout the middle section could have gone a long way towards showing more of the contrast between what she has to do or say to survive or to act strong for Benor vs. what she is really thinking or feeling inside at that moment. Like with anything this is all just my opinion and we all know what they say about those 😉. In the past you have offered criticism of some of the choices I have made in my own stories and at the time I strongly disagreed with them but as I thought on it I changed my mind and it influenced decisions I made moving forward. That's really the only reason I said anything- I don't believe anything you did with your story is "wrong" (nor can anything creative really be called wrong to begin with) but sometimes other takes on something can just give us something to think about.

That's some in depth analysis regarding Malicia. And yes, Tabrielle's thoughts are shut down the moment Benor comes. That's because she doesn't want to think, and is rather focusing to the task at hand (which is surviving), and responding to Benor's impulses.

 

I did make one mistake though, that being that I intended to add tears while she was hitting the floor in her rage. But.. I forgot. XD

 

Lastly, originally this chapter was twice longer, but I decided to split it in two to make it easier to read, and develop a bit more Benor's character. A lot of what I might've clumsily expressing will make sense when it'll be published.

 

I also want to say that while I partly disagree, I do appreciate your honest criticism, Spy.

12 hours ago, SpyVsPie said:

Yes the way he is only slightly blurred while everything else is heavily blurred conveys that perfectly and the shot overall is framed very well. Definitely up there at WANOBI levels 🤣 (Speaking of which looking over that wardrobe malfunction scene here I think maybe I wasn't the only one who was revisiting Abuse of Authority recently 🤔). The clash was good too and didn't seem poorly done or anything like that.

Say no more, you're forgiven ! :lol:

12 hours ago, SpyVsPie said:

Sometimes stopping is a huge improvement. 

^^

12 hours ago, SpyVsPie said:

I do think that one of your greatest strengths throughout the Malicia centered tales has been your juxtaposition of reality vs. Malicia's retelling of it (which in many cases DOES come across very much as her way of dealing with trauma and is very well done). Here we have a bit of Tabrielle's thoughts in the intro and a bit more at the end related to how to defeat the Draugr but I think maybe adding more throughout the middle section could have gone a long way towards showing more of the contrast between what she has to do or say to survive or to act strong for Benor vs. what she is really thinking or feeling inside at that moment. 😉

Malicia : « I very agree with my chronicles being very the best, yes, even though you don't need to be a spy to see it. :classic_sleepy:

 

                But I very don't what you're meaning about trauma as I'm very successful and very outstanding. :classic_sleep: »

 

DEVIANNA

Spoiler
12 hours ago, Devianna said:

First of all - WOOHOO! Go Tabi! Though as I stated in the last chapter, I had suspicions that she was alive it was still very good to get a confirmation of it! 🤗 (I even guessed correctly that something drastic and magical would have to happen for her to recover 😋)

 

I can see that this chapter might bring even more controversy than your previous one, so I'll try to give you my take on it. From Tabi's narration it sounds like this is not the first (or even second or third) time she has died. And though it's possible this is the first that she's been raped, the notion of being broken (physically) and defeated does not seem to be alien to her. It also feels that she adopts a sort of soldier mentality in such cases : deal with the situation and get out of the immediate danger first, process everything that happened and let your emotions flow - second, once everyone is safe.  It wouldn't surprise me if in the later episodes when they are out of those caverns Tabi will have bouts of nightmares, self-loathing and fits of anger.

And so the Sharingan reader strikes again ! :smiley: Indeed, Tabrielle is focusing on the task at hand, as she sees her vigilance as a necessary condition for Benor not to make more of what would be mistakes to her.

 

You're right on both statements : Tabrielle indeed has died in the past (though not more than once, enough for her to grasp the feel of resurrecting) ; and her kekkei genkai hereditary gift is indeed an extreme way of dealing with the physical consequences of deadly situation. So, from there, we can deduce that, though she intended to escape after having distracted Urunach long enough, her sacrifice was a willing one, knowing she might lose one of her precious lives. She hasn't got a great number of them though, so it's still costly.

12 hours ago, Devianna said:

 (By the way, Benor seems to know about Tabi's resurrection ability? He was obviously worried about her but not completely devastated by the situation).

He never witnessed it, and doesn't suspects she can defy death. In fact she stopped suffering both from rapes and defeats the moment she associated herself with him. That being said he was worried, but those worries were lifted by the integral visual body check he could perform right from the start. :lol:

 

He should've been expecting her to be injured though, but Tabrielle also knowing about restoration spells one could supposed she healed herself magically.

However he knows she has been raped in the past, which is why he tries to prevent her morale going down to zero. Part of the reasons why he's joking as usual while going though the maze. 

 

So far everyone missed a small detail in the last couple of chapters though. Just like Resdayn with his subtleties, I feared I made it too obvious, but I you didn't outline it must mean that I didn't. So it's a relief. :classic_wink:

12 hours ago, Devianna said:

Your effects keep on improving more and more with every entry (how is that even possible? They are already absolutely gorgeous to begin with!). Jolkass regenerating his arm back looked especially great! And his blushing at Tabi's predicament with her skirt was just too adorable! 🤣 I also wonder if he perhaps considers her a true warrior due to her Thu'um ability and treats her as such, giving her the time to get dressed and compose herself.  Still, his regeneration coupled with his battle prowess and dragon shouts will prove to be quite a challenge for our brave duo.

In fact just like Urunach Jolkas requires the opponent to meet certain conditions to even be faced, those being to be able to block or counter his thu'um. As for his fair-play attiude, that's indeed the one of a warrior who doesn't want of a victory without honor. :classic_smile:

 

As for the effects, thanks ! I've always invested quite some time in them, but I think that applying what I learned from Wanobi to other kind of edits gradually allowed me to improve them. He was such a great member from our community...

12 hours ago, Devianna said:

I'm also curious if you ever watched the show Supernatural. A similar 'self-resurrection' technique was used by one of the characters and it is a rather clever idea.

Anyway - great job and this episode was certainly worth the wait! (I want more...can we have more please?! 🥰)

 

As always, thank you for your wonderful stories. They are always a great pleasure to read! 🤗

I didn't get to watch Supernatural, Spy was on point with the Highlander influence.

 

Thanks a lot for the good words as always, Devianna. Awaiting the pleasure to read your own stories ! 🤗

 

 

JAYOMMS

Spoiler
10 hours ago, Jayomms said:

Great work on explaining Tabi's ability. ;):thumbsup: I was gonna to something similar with Maylin. Something's like.... You'll see. :)

Oh oh, so we'll get to learn more on your Dovakhin then. Glad I was clear enough explaining Tabrielle's particularities, I feared I had been too verbose but apparently it's fine.

10 hours ago, Jayomms said:

I've been working in building fabrication so I have less time now. And the job has been rough drilling into metal all day. I hurt my knees, arms and hands but my knees more than anything. I was finally able to see a doctor about it and got it taken care of. What a hell of a month... it was good exercise least. :sweat_smile:    

Make sure you do work in adequate conditions (position, protections, weight lifting limits and so on) ; working isn't not worth to lose your health to it.

 

Thanks for you comment, Jayomms. :classic_wink:

 

 

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20 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

Having a lightsource isn't enough to beat him, it is required to have a chance to do so. He isn't really undead either, as the ritual of the heart change is one involving the forces of nature. That being said, I believe Gauis would be a solid match-up to everyone, if he's the one you're thinking to. But Urunach  isn't a hoax, he just doesn't see why he'd help his opponents to understand the mistakes not to do against him. Thus the rumors about him defeating whole squads without receiving a single hit. Yet, while that might've happened, I don't believe we saw him when he's really serious.  :classic_smile:

Well, I even censored some bits at the start to avoid them averting the show from the topic at hand. ^^

 

But yeah, the skirt flying was an intentional lighthearted fanservice moment as well as a small critic to what should realistically happen to warriors fighting in light apparel in such moments. :classic_biggrin:

Yes, I thought on Gauis, but he is literally most combat oriented character of my ones, outside of direct combat he has access of the Empire, his personal forces, money. His combat skills and magic one thing, and having the entire empire almost at his hand is other. Also having Trinn as well an ally 😇

 

Other antagonist like the Champion of Vaermina or Defiler are different type of match up, Champion will be covered by the in the coming chapters and Defiler is not someone who can be "killed" by any normal means, she also never really take things seriously.

 

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Wow, the another long awaited chapter from Tirloque!

Spoiler

 


There are so many interesting things in here! I don’t even know where to start!
A catastrophically interesting concept of immortality, albeit not guaranteeing absolute immortality, and quite balanced, but still!
The inner torment of the Tabi, allowing us to better feel the languor and severity of this moment.
Amazing, heavily modified comic layout. I think that to create this you need not only the skills of owning graphic editors above the basic level, but also an outstanding fantasy. I myself would not have thought of some of the things that you presented. Like this:
 

Spoiler

TXfmxldM_o.jpg

Looks rally cool and charming.

And of course, not without humor, which remarkably relieves the situation. ^_^
Amazing work, Tirloque. It's always a pleasure to watch and read what you do. ^_^

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1 hour ago, Crw said:

Wow, the another long awaited chapter from Tirloque!

  Reveal hidden contents

 


There are so many interesting things in here! I don’t even know where to start!
A catastrophically interesting concept of immortality, albeit not guaranteeing absolute immortality, and quite balanced, but still!
The inner torment of the Tabi, allowing us to better feel the languor and severity of this moment.

It has some limits, such as the lack of control over the trigger moment, and the limited amount of revives. But indeed, though very powerful, depending on the amount of lives stored I don't see it as overpowered for a character whose strength is still comparable to the one of other fighters. And Tabrielle's currently demonstrated one, though definitely heroic already, doesn't even reaches the category of Urunach's. Which is was she was humiliated, and is indeed frustrated by her powerlessness. :classic_smile:

1 hour ago, Crw said:

Amazing, heavily modified comic layout. I think that to create this you need not only the skills of owning graphic editors above the basic level, but also an outstanding fantasy. I myself would not have thought of some of the things that you presented. Like this:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

TXfmxldM_o.jpg

Looks rally cool and charming.

And of course, not without humor, which remarkably relieves the situation. ^_^
Amazing work, Tirloque. It's always a pleasure to watch and read what you do. ^_^

I knew you'd be perceptive towards the comic layout. This chapter's is an irregular layout combining inserts (images into other images), broken frames (parts of images breaking their border), and an otherwise rather variable layout : sometimes there are no borders at all, sometimes there are. I quite like the board you quoted, as its theme is the smoke made by the replacement soul making its way to restore Tabrielle's life. And so the eye goes naturally from cell to cell, guided by the smoke, without any artificial border breaking the flow. Smiley_henri_gaud-belin_HFR.gif

 

It's not yet on point of course, there are some points which are irregular just because I didn't address them ; so it's not mature at the moment. ^^

But doing comics some day is still something I'm dreaming of, and the best way of getting closer to it is practicing, isn't it ? Thanks for your appreciation, fellow comic maker Crw ! :classic_wink:

18 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Yes, I thought on Gauis, but he is literally most combat oriented character of my ones, outside of direct combat he has access of the Empire, his personal forces, money. His combat skills and magic one thing, and having the entire empire almost at his hand is other. Also having Trinn as well an ally 😇

Empire and Forsworn do not fare too well, but Urunach's quarrel is mostly with Nords. Yet though not having global world ambitions but rather regional ones, he's far from stupid as a strategist. So far the Forsworn only resorted to guerilla tactics against the superior Nord guard. Yet, things are evolving with Urunach gathering them. The day they'll see his force assuming a frontal confrontation will mean the situation evolved quite badly for the Nords. Smiley_whistle_HFR.gif

 

As for beating Urunach himself, aside of the mage + light requirement, and putting aside power scaling considerations, it would also require to have met him before hand to establish a strategy. And so far the survivors to his reality marble have been only two...

18 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Other antagonist like the Champion of Vaermina or Defiler are different type of match up, Champion will be covered by the in the coming chapters and Defiler is not someone who can be "killed" by any normal means, she also never really take things seriously.

Well, the protagonists of our stories aren't exactly limited to normal means, are they ? Anyway, it'll be highly interesting to see the ones of your stories truly clashing against each other. Though it's a pain to execute for a storymaker, a good result is really rewarding. :classic_wink:

 

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1 hour ago, Tirloque said:

 

Empire and Forsworn do not fare too well, but Urunach's quarrel is mostly with Nords. Yet though not having global world ambitions but rather regional ones, he's far from stupid as a strategist. So far the Forsworn only resorted to guerilla tactics against the superior Nord guard. Yet, things are evolving with Urunach gathering them. The day they'll see his force assuming a frontal confrontation will mean the situation evolved quite badly for the Nords. Smiley_whistle_HFR.gif

 

As for beating Urunach himself, aside of the mage + light requirement, and putting aside power scaling considerations, it would also require to have met him before hand to establish a strategy. And so far the survivors to his reality marble have been only two...

 

I don't think he is match certain imperial strategist 😇, and Gauis can bring him if he think military wise necessary.

 

If he hides in the mine, He can put himself and his elite force along with Markarth's canon fodder for testing purposes and lay siege.

 

While the Strategist himself led an army with mixed legion and nords as an Imperial campaign against the forsworn. 😊

 

Fighting against him at daylight is advised I guess, gotta drain the light of Sun😅

1 hour ago, Tirloque said:

 

Well, the protagonists of our stories aren't exactly limited to normal means, are they ? Anyway, it'll be highly interesting to see the ones of your stories truly clashing against each other. Though it's a pain to execute for a storymaker, a good result is really rewarding. :classic_wink:

 

I don't think Arilith would ever have a conflict with Gwynolda 🤔

 

Well depends which one, some limited to normal means, like Arilith.

 

Gwynolda is not really that much.

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On 3/1/2020 at 12:20 PM, Resdayn said:

I don't think he is match certain imperial strategist 😇, and Gauis can bring him if he think military wise necessary.

 

If he hides in the mine, He can put himself and his elite force along with Markarth's canon fodder for testing purposes and lay siege.

 

While the Strategist himself led an army with mixed legion and nords as an Imperial campaign against the forsworn. 😊

One doesn't need to have a gilded uniform to make smart decisions. As for Urunach, the mine is his base of operation, but contrary to what happened before he has a full fledged fighting force all around. While not fighting square to square, it's militarily significant. So laying siege, while sacrificing the individuals venturing in the mine during day, could very well also mean getting surrounded at night while what's in the mine would start expanding outdoors. So risking to lose lose all those around the mine once the night has come. 

 

Also the numbers of his forces isn't known with precision, they do know the terrain perfectly, and have been fighting for it all life long. So they're more than just cost effective in the Reach against the dulled force of their opponents. That's the problem with Urunach : he and his force are only a regional problem, insufficient to call a national reaction in a land already in civil war... but his abilities make it so that a regional response alone seems ineffective.

 

And when he'll stop going through guerilla tactics for his offensives, then it'll mean the game is over for the Nords. Who might also not be exactly fond of pompous high graded imperial officers. And so Tullius isn't fool enough to invest the Reach with full force, while putting at risk his grasp on the rest of Skyrim. 

On 3/1/2020 at 12:20 PM, Resdayn said:

Fighting against him at daylight is advised I guess, gotta drain the light of Sun😅

Indeed. Which might be why he ventures mostly at night at the moment.

On 3/1/2020 at 12:20 PM, Resdayn said:

I don't think Arilith would ever have a conflict with Gwynolda 🤔

 

Well depends which one, some limited to normal means, like Arilith.

 

Gwynolda is not really that much.

I meant protagonists in the broad sense of the word, which includes the leading figures of the different factions of your stories : Gauis vs the Defiler, Gwynolda vs Vaermina's champion, Alyssa vs her horse and so on. :classic_tongue:

 

 

 

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On 3/1/2020 at 6:20 AM, Resdayn said:

 

Fighting against him at daylight is advised I guess, gotta drain the light of Sun😅

 

This sounds like a job for Day Man. Fighter of the Night Man.

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On 3/2/2020 at 5:22 AM, Tirloque said:

 

I meant protagonists in the broad sense of the word, which includes the leading figures of the different factions of your stories : Gauis vs the Defiler, Gwynolda vs Vaermina's champion, Alyssa vs her horse and so on. :classic_tongue:

 

 

 

 

Desire to see a giant Royal Rumble of LL characters intensifies 🤔

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3 hours ago, SpyVsPie said:

 

Desire to see a giant Royal Rumble of LL characters intensifies 🤔

I can already tell you who'd be the most intelligent, most beautiful and strongest of the rumble (according to her at least). :classic_tongue:

 

Now that'd be quite hard to do. But there have been some multi crossover entries, such as r1pper's ones:classic_smile:

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4 hours ago, Tirloque said:

I can already tell you who'd be the most intelligent, most beautiful and strongest of the rumble (according to her at least). :classic_tongue:

 

Now that'd be quite hard to do. But there have been some multi crossover entries, such as r1pper's ones:classic_smile:

Or a bracket system 🤔

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