NitroHamlin Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 6 minutes ago, Psalam said: GRANTED! but you'll have to come to America and go to a Knights of Columbus Hall. I wish I didn't have to see patients today. Granted. You don't have to see any patients today, because they've come to see you ...and they don't seem happy with you. I wish modern housing designs didn't look so square and stupid.
Psalam Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Quote 2 hours ago, NitroHamlin said: Granted. You don't have to see any patients today, because they've come to see you ...and they don't seem happy with you. I wish modern housing designs didn't look so square and stupid. GRANTED! you now have macular degeneration and they look all squishy with the center missing (kind of like a poorly made doughnut). I wish it wasn't raining today (and, ostensibly, all day tomorrow too).
Oburael Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Granted! It snows instead! I wish I had no sex drive.
Psalam Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Quote 6 minutes ago, Oburael said: Granted! It snows instead! I wish I had no sex drive. GRANTED! your physician "accidentally" performs a bilateral orchiectomy (instead of a vasectomy I suppose) and starts you on female hormones and Prozac (just to be sure). I wish there were no chance of snow here tomorrow (it's small but real according to the Weather Channel).
worik Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 2 hours ago, Psalam said: I wish there were no chance of snow here tomorrow (it's small but real according to the Weather Channel). Granted, a heat wave with temperatures near the deadly threshold will sweep over the land. I wish my certain other one isn't too tired tonight for ...
Psalam Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Quote 22 minutes ago, worik said: Granted, a heat wave with temperatures near the deadly threshold will sweep over the land. I wish my certain other one isn't too tired tonight for ... GRANTED! she'll be all-in for binge watching television. I wish human beings had a better sense of the difference between fantasy and reality.
NitroHamlin Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 2 hours ago, Psalam said: GRANTED! she'll be all-in for binge watching television. I wish human beings had a better sense of the difference between fantasy and reality. Granted. But we are no longer human. Spoiler I wish I had never bought that sword. 1
Psalam Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Quote 10 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said: Granted. But we are no longer human. Reveal hidden contents I wish I had never bought that sword. GRANTED! you bought a big stick instead. I wish there were another sentient species here on Earth other than man in order to give humans a good example.
worik Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 11 hours ago, Psalam said: I wish there were another sentient species here on Earth other than man in order to give humans a good example. Granted, but there was no need to wish. They were already there. Thousands of species. Humans just lack the minimum level of intelligence to grasp even the simplest meanings of their examples. I wish I wouldn't be soooo lazy on a weekend (pyjamas) day like today.
NitroHamlin Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 8 minutes ago, worik said: Granted, but there was no need to wish. They were already there. Thousands of species. Humans just lack the minimum level of intelligence to grasp even the simplest meanings of their examples. I wish I wouldn't be soooo lazy on a weekend (pyjamas) day like today. Granted. You'll be busy trying to get this guy out of your house. Spoiler I wish I had lightning powers like the ones in Divinity: Original Sin 2.
Psalam Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 GRANTED! You will now have lightning coming from your ass whenever you fart! Aside: Spoiler If you measure the ions in a human being's blood you will find something that medical professionals refer to as the anion gap. While I don't want to go into why it appears or what use it is in medicine, my old nephrology professor reminded us that there was no "real" gap, that it was a result of what gets measured instead. "Because," he said, "if it really existed we would all go walking around shooting lightning out of our asses." This was in 1985 - ten years BEFORE Braveheart. I wish my dog enjoyed being in my den with me more than she does. 1
jfraser Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 GRANTED! your den is now the only place your dog will poop. I wish I could take (and pass) this stupid test already so I could start my job.
Psalam Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 Quote 24 minutes ago, jfraser said: GRANTED! your den is now the only place your dog will poop. I wish I could take (and pass) this stupid test already so I could start my job. GRANTED! sadly your new job is studying for and passing the test. I wish my shoulder would stop hurting.
worik Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 30 minutes ago, Psalam said: I wish my shoulder would stop hurting. Granted, now it is itching like hell I wish I won't draw the short straw about who is driving tonight ... ?? ?? ??? ?
Psalam Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 Quote 39 minutes ago, worik said: Granted, now it is itching like hell I wish I won't draw the short straw about who is driving tonight ... ?? ?? ??? ? GRANTED! but just for tonight the LONG straw will be the designated driver. I wish my kids have a good time today.
DarksideTinkerbell Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 32 minutes ago, Psalam said: GRANTED! but just for tonight the LONG straw will be the designated driver. I wish my kids have a good time today. Granted but the bail money for that good time will bankrupt you I wish the final book for Game of Thrones would finally be written and released.
Psalam Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 GRANTED! sadly it is only available in a single bookstore in Addis Ababa and only published in Bantu (just to make it harder). I wish it would stop raining.
Oburael Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 Granted, but the evil snow returns! I wish I could time travel and never age while doing it!
Psalam Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 Quote 1 hour ago, Oburael said: Granted, but the evil snow returns! I wish I could time travel and never age while doing it! GRANTED! unfortunately you are now two years old and will remember none of it. I wish the sun would come out.
NitroHamlin Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 2 hours ago, Psalam said: GRANTED! unfortunately you are now two years old and will remember none of it. I wish the sun would come out. Granted. But the sun will not stop telling you about it? I wish that skunk in my dream would not come back (I didn't know it was a dream and I thought it was going to spray me)
Psalam Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 Quote 32 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said: Granted. But the sun will not stop telling you about it? I wish that skunk in my dream would not come back (I didn't know it was a dream and I thought it was going to spray me) Granted! Now it will visit you only during your waking hours - oh! and it will be stinky mad too! I wish fewer wild animals were killed on roads around here.
worik Posted April 21, 2019 Posted April 21, 2019 8 hours ago, Psalam said: I wish fewer wild animals were killed on roads around here. Granted, but the lord of death demands the missing lives. Thankfully mankind is eager to please him and the usual suspects deliver the same amount in form of children by the power their SUVs grant them. I wish I won't be too lazy to tidy up the garden
jfraser Posted April 21, 2019 Posted April 21, 2019 1 hour ago, worik said: Granted, but the lord of death demands the missing lives. Thankfully mankind is eager to please him and the usual suspects deliver the same amount in form of children by the power their SUVs grant them. I wish I won't be too lazy to tidy up the garden granted In a drug-fueled fervor you not only tidy up the garden, you tear it completely out and replace it with abstract art made from decomposing body parts. I wish I could get to sleep
DarksideTinkerbell Posted April 21, 2019 Posted April 21, 2019 1 hour ago, jfraser said: granted In a drug-fueled fervor you not only tidy up the garden, you tear it completely out and replace it with abstract art made from decomposing body parts. I wish I could get to sleep Granted but when you get to it, sleep wants nothing to do with you. I wish I had all the money I have ever used for stupid "I shouldn't have bought that" spending.
NitroHamlin Posted April 21, 2019 Posted April 21, 2019 3 hours ago, DarksideTinkerbell said: Granted but when you get to it, sleep wants nothing to do with you. I wish I had all the money I have ever used for stupid "I shouldn't have bought that" spending. Granted. But two thirds of it was used to buy my Elusidator longsword replica (that I've been longing to get rid of) off me, and one sixth is used for socks that you will wear but are too warm for summer and too cool for winter. The rest you get to keep. I wish the Divine and Unholy were both not malicious.
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