Corrupt A Wish

[NitroHamlin]

2 hours ago, Anonyshadow said:

GRANTED! You are blessed with an infinite supply of undies but you can only ever wear them and they have skid marks that are not yours that will never come out!

 

I wish my pet dragon hadn't watched Shrek and gotten ideas.

Granted. Now your pet dragon has access to your computer and all of a sudden wants to swallow you whole.

 

I wish I knew who, why and how the "I tried to sneak into an enemy base but I was so dummy thicc my ass clapped and gave my position away" thing came from (I've seen it referenced a few times in pictures before).

[Psalam]

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13 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. Now your pet dragon has access to your computer and all of a sudden wants to swallow you whole.

 

I wish I knew who, why and how the "I tried to sneak into an enemy base but I was so dummy thicc my ass clapped and gave my position away" thing came from (I've seen it referenced a few times in pictures before).

 

GRANTED! there it is! Oops, well you did have it and now it's popped clean out of your head again.

 

I wish that everyone on LoversLab would just converse in a civil manner (present company excepted, of course. This thread would be no fun otherwise.)

[NitroHamlin]

21 hours ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! there it is! Oops, well you did have it and now it's popped clean out of your head again.

 

I wish that everyone on LoversLab would just converse in a civil manner (present company excepted, of course. This thread would be no fun otherwise.)

Granted. But because I don't have my glasses on I cannot see bracketed text, so everyone will be civil as if they were in an office board meeting for safety around train tracks and if you step out of line you will immediately be FIRED right then and there, on the spot, without a doubt, no mercy given, no second chances, done and dusted, FOREVER!!?

 

I wish I had slightly wider hips.

[Psalam]

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2 hours ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. But because I don't have my glasses on I cannot see bracketed text, so everyone will be civil as if they were in an office board meeting for safety around train tracks and if you step out of line you will immediately be FIRED right then and there, on the spot, without a doubt, no mercy given, no second chances, done and dusted, FOREVER!!?

 

I wish I had slightly wider hips.

 

GRANTED! but now your butt is 4 times the size.

[worik]

44 minutes ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! but now your butt is 4 times the size.

*cough*

I wish @Psalam had any wishes so we could corrupt them in the most corrupting possible way ?

[NitroHamlin]

57 minutes ago, worik said:

*cough*

I wish @Psalam had any wishes so we could corrupt them in the most corrupting possible way ?

Granteeeeeeeed. Crap, it's kind of out of my power whether he forgets to make a wish or not. But when he does it will be corrupted "in the most corrupting possible way".

 

I wish whenever I'm dungeon traveling and step on a trap, I don't become part of a scenario where I'm the victim of someones fetish (or die, come to think of it).

[Psalam]

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50 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granteeeeeeeed. Crap, it's kind of out of my power whether he forgets to make a wish or not. But when he does it will be corrupted "in the most corrupting possible way".

 

I wish whenever I'm dungeon traveling and step on a trap, I don't become part of a scenario where I'm the victim of someones fetish (or die, come to think of it).

 

GRANTED! you can no longer use mods on any of your games.

 

I wish I was a little less forgetful (or how about, I wish coming up with wishes was as easy as corrupting them, or some other lame excuse - your choice).

[Psalam]

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9 minutes ago, Anonyshadow said:

GRANTED! You remember everything as clearly as if it is happening right now, in fact your memory is so good you are literally reliving every moment of your life at the same time as your life continues to progress! This goes all the way back to your very birth so you can witness the miracle of your own coming into being! (Hmm, did I go a little too dark with this one?)

 

I wish that sexy aliens would invade earth.

 

GRANTED! they're all over. It doesn't mean that they are interested in you.

 

I wish I could time travel.

[NitroHamlin]

5 hours ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! they're all over. It doesn't mean that they are interested in you.

 

I wish I could time travel.

Granted. Ever played Twisted Metal?

Spoiler

 

 

I wish I had a hover ship (like the one in Ratchet: Gladiator)

Spoiler

 

[Psalam]

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7 hours ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. Ever played Twisted Metal?

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

I wish I had a hover ship (like the one in Ratchet: Gladiator)

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

Granted! You know where to find it (Addis Ababa) and you know the language in which the instructions will be printed (Bantu).

 

I wish I could walk on water (not like the Cuyahgoa River in Cleveland where you actually walk on the pollution either).

[Psalam]

GRANTED! there are plenty of other places and languages from which to choose. I'll hook onto others until you're tired of them too!

 

I wish I had a good idea of what location and language to grab next.

[NitroHamlin]

48 minutes ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! there are plenty of other places and languages from which to choose. I'll hook onto others until you're tired of them too!

 

I wish I had a good idea of what location and language to grab next.

Granted. You do find an idea, but just like forgetting to make a wish after corrupting another, you forget about this as well.

 

I wish for a good day tomorrow.

[Psalam]

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23 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. You do find an idea, but just like forgetting to make a wish after corrupting another, you forget about this as well.

 

I wish for a good day tomorrow.

 

GRANTED! tomorrow will be an excellent day for President Mulatu Teshome Wirtu.

 

I wish people weren't already tired of Ethiopia.

[worik]

5 hours ago, Psalam said:

I wish people weren't already tired of Ethiopia.

Granted! Everybody on earth feels excited about Ethiopia and isn't talking about anything else for the next years, while the rest of this planet goes to hell. (except of Ethiopia) ??

 

I wish would be less tired and could sleep through the next night without getting a wake up right in the middle of my personal dreamland. ?

[Psalam]

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19 minutes ago, worik said:

Granted! Everybody on earth feels excited about Ethiopia and isn't talking about anything else for the next years, while the rest of this planet goes to hell. (except of Ethiopia) ??

 

I wish would be less tired and could sleep through the next night without getting a wake up right in the middle of my personal dreamland. ?

 

GRANTED! you will sleep deeply until your "Prince Charming" comes to wake you with a kiss. That could take a loooooooong time (it did for Sleeping Beauty anyway.)

 

I wish more African states and people would EMBRACE democracy.

[worik]

6 minutes ago, Psalam said:

I wish more African states and people would EMBRACE democracy.

Granted! The most disgusting dictators and oligarchs and their underlings learn to love democrats. The love them so much, they collect them by the thousands in their basements and keep them there for the years to come. ⛓️

 

I wish so called "democracies" and "republics" would take the meaning of those words serious.

[Psalam]

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9 minutes ago, worik said:

Granted! The most disgusting dictators and oligarchs and their underlings learn to love democrats. The love them so much, they collect them by the thousands in their basements and keep them there for the years to come. ⛓️

 

I wish so called "democracies" and "republics" would take the meaning of those words serious.

 

(A bit cynical are we? I'm a fine one to talk. Those tinpot dictators are already keeping those collections. Anyway ..)

 

GRANTED! they looked it up in the modern English dictionary and discovered the definitions to be the same: "he or she who has the gold, makes the rules."

 

I wish people would quit getting so excited about semantics.

[NitroHamlin]

5 hours ago, Anonyshadow said:

GRANTED! But you stuttered when saying semantics to the genie so it instead sounded like you said some antics. So some antics cause no excitement! (Now don't get caught up in the semantics of this one xD)

 

I wish upon a fish that I was a cat in Egypt.

 

 

Granted. You are a cat in Egypt... After Humanity had been wiped out by the Walking Fish With Human Legs. (They're coming for you next)

 

I wish I had more to say.

[Psalam]

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1 hour ago, Anonyshadow said:

(Not gonna lie. That sounds like a badass story of cat rebellion xD lil cat smoking a cigar with an AR15 ready)

 

GRANTED! You now have an infinitesimal amount of things to say, however due to a strange and ironic accident you have been rendered mute and illiterate.

 

I wish that cat vs walking fish people movie existed and it was a 10/10 rated action film starring the guy that VAs solid snake as the main character.

 

GRANTED! Oh wait, I can't do Addis Ababa and Bantu! Shit! Okay. You can find it at Chichen Itza and you'll need to learn Nahuatl to understand a word of it.

 

I wish I could get excited over a movie, any movie.

[Psalam]

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44 minutes ago, Anonyshadow said:

(LOL Would totes do it if it existed)

 

GRANTED! You are excited within the first second of every movie, but following that second you are hit immediately with the most extreme case of post-show depression. This causes a roller coaster of emotions everytime you watch a movie where you are excited, depressed, excited, depressed until the show is over! (For real this would suck, post show depression is awful x.x)

 

I wish I was native Japanese.

 

(props, this was a hard one)

 

GRANTED! you were born in Japan to non-native Japanese and smuggled out of the country as an infant and raised by the people you've always thought were your parents (sounds like one of those movies you just described).

 

I wish I could just go to lunch already!

[worik]

5 hours ago, Psalam said:

I wish I could just go to lunch already!

Granted! Today's special: charred skeever with rotten tomato salad. And the chef is an unwashed orc with a big axe instead of a knife ... and no sense of humor.

 

I wish I would wake up tomorrow and 12 of the 16 hours in wake-state today were nothing but a (bad) dream.

[Psalam]

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8 minutes ago, worik said:

Granted! Today's special: charred skeever with rotten tomato salad. And the chef is an unwashed orc with a big axe instead of a knife ... and no sense of humor.

 

I wish I would wake up tomorrow and 12 of the 16 hours in wake-state today were nothing but a (bad) dream.

 

GRANTED! (happens when you take Chantix too.) The problem is the OTHER 4 hours were real and you remembered them incorrectly. That's where the REAL problem lies.

 

I wish I could get motivated to finish my follower mod.

[NitroHamlin]

4 hours ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! (happens when you take Chantix too.) The problem is the OTHER 4 hours were real and you remembered them incorrectly. That's where the REAL problem lies.

 

I wish I could get motivated to finish my follower mod.

Granted. You'll have so much motivation, you end up making your follower mod a highly advanced AI with thoughts and feelings, like a human. This means they wont want to be your follower from the get-go and can become annoyed with you, and if you confront them about the game they'll have an existential crisis that causes your follower to take control of your computer and with the power of the internet, take control of the world. With the persuasion of every loaded nuclear missile silo in the world, humanity was immediately brought to heel at the (cyber) hands of Psalam's follower mod, turning what once was a passive follower into a vengeful leader.

 

I wish more games had multiple endings.

[Psalam]

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8 hours ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. You'll have so much motivation, you end up making your follower mod a highly advanced AI with thoughts and feelings, like a human. This means they wont want to be your follower from the get-go and can become annoyed with you, and if you confront them about the game they'll have an existential crisis that causes your follower to take control of your computer and with the power of the internet, take control of the world. With the persuasion of every loaded nuclear missile silo in the world, humanity was immediately brought to heel at the (cyber) hands of Psalam's follower mod, turning what once was a passive follower into a vengeful leader.

 

I wish more games had multiple endings.

 

(me too!)

 

GRANTED! now every game you play will also have the option to end at any, unspecified 5 minute interval by crashing to desktop and locking up your computer. That should amount to some 100 additional endings for most games I play (not that I'd want any of those).

[NitroHamlin]

*cough* *cough* *hack* *whEEEEEEEze*

 

I can't stop this feeling, and I wish I could ♪♪