What is the dumbest thing you believed as a child?

[megamantaray]

We believe a lot of dumb things as children, be it Santa Claus or something much more specific like that eating fruit seeds will cause a tree to grow in your stomach.

What was the dumbest thing you believed as a kid?

 

For me, it probably wasn't the dumbest thing I ever believed, but it's what I was thinking about and made me decide to post this. It's also probably one of the things like this that had the longest lasting effect when confronted with reality:

Anyway, basically, I believed Sonic the Hedgehog was what all hedgehogs should look like. Tails? Nah that's not a real fox. Knuckles? What even is an Echidna? Sonic though? If it's not blue it's not a hedgehog. It better be standing up, wearing shoes and collecting rings too! Especially since other animals in the game were normal and small. This was fine for a while though, who cares if this idiot believes hedgehogs specifically and no other animals are cartoony, she'll grow out of it!

Well, at some point my best friend got herself a hedgehog as a pet. She named him Sonic of course, since we spent most of the time at my house playing games, and the very first day she got this cute little thing she brought him over so I could see him. What ensued was a ridiculous argument that lasted only a few minutes but left us not talking to each other for a few days and for a while I refused to believe the little spiky dude was a hedgehog but I guess I grew out of it eventually, or saw them on TV and realised real life animals aren't always like in video games.

I was around 7 years old back then, I dunno if that's still in the age range to be that stupid and get away with it, but that's my story, maybe other people have some interesting ones.

[27X]

karma/god surely must exist.

[Tirloque]

I believed adults were wise.

 

That was before I got committed to the asylum though. XD

[Crw0]

That people who work at a certain job know what they are doing. Almost the same as @Tirloque said, but the lack of wisdom does not always lead to an adverse outcome. 

A doctor who does not know how to treat, or an engineer designing a building incorrectly, is dangerous.

[Mr. Otaku]

I believed a lot of dumb things as a kid, i was a fucking idiot lmao. Some of the dumbest things i believed consist of:

 

1) Girls also had dicks.

2) Praying to god will make things better and bring happiness and also that god(s) exists.

3) Cartoon characters are absolutely real and they're just in a distant island somewhere.

4) Everyone cooked as well as my mom.

5) Vehicles are actually alive and the headlights and front grills are their eyes and mouths.

6) People on the TV screen are tiny people that live inside the TV and there's a whole world in there. (connected to number 3 above)

7) If i'm nice to people they'll always be nice in return.

 

There are surely many more than just these but i can't remember them very well.

[donttouchmethere]

??

I'm still mad at Maya the Bee, because my mother told me that she stole my beeloved pacifier.

For a while I believed that Willy the Bee talked her into this disgusting crime.

I'm still convinced Maya would never do something like that.

Also I was sure that the pacifier is way too heavy for one bee to carry, so Maya had at least one accomplice.

?

[megamantaray]

1 hour ago, Alkpaz said:

Since this is LL, I'll share something sex related. For the longest time, after watching a movie with a man + woman having doggy-style sex, I believed that sex with a woman (making babies) meant doing it in the butt. It was not until I was a teenager that I figured it out. 

I was sorta the opposite, that wasn't a thing I believed very long mind you but I believed men and women both had vaginas and when it came time to have a baby they'd kiss and one of them would choose to become pregnant. It would most often be the woman because she had more free time, but sometimes dads got pregnant too and that's how you had twins. I think my brain thought some BS up about sea-horses due to one of my mom's friends having this weird moustache thing that tickled me when she visited.

[porkybork]

When I was like 4 years old, my older sisters somehow convinced me to believe that chickens grew on trees. I don't know if I believed them because I had no idea how animals and plants reproduce/grow or if I just really trusted them, but yeah. My mom got really mad at them and told them something along the lines of "you two better stop telling porkybork these kinds of things or else you're going to make him retarded!"

The three of us are all in our twenties now, and they have yet to let me live it down.

[megamantaray]

54 minutes ago, porkybork said:

When I was like 4 years old, my older sisters somehow convinced me to believe that chickens grew on trees. I don't know if I believed them because I had no idea how animals and plants reproduce/grow or if I just really trusted them, but yeah. My mom got really mad at them and told them something along the lines of "you two better stop telling porkybork these kinds of things or else you're going to make him retarded!"

The three of us are all in our twenties now, and they have yet to let me live it down.

I know it's just your username but I imagined a nice older lady yelling at her kids like "HEY! Stop trying to trick porkybork!" like it was your real name and it made me laugh really hard.

I'm so fucking stupid.

[megamantaray]

5 minutes ago, Konata Inoue said:

Don't ask why, as even I don't understand why I once thought this, but I used to think there were Bananas inside of these boxes on the telegraph poles.

That's how they do the yellow for the traffic light.

This is common knowledge, duh.

[Reginald_001]

"That people are inherently good".

 

Took me 38 years to realize this is just not the case.

[nIn nIn nIn]

For a while as a kid (can't remember the age) I was convinced that in the old days people saw in grey. not colour. Most non-fiction books were illustrated with black and white photos, so my dumb kid mind concluded that was how everyone actually saw back then. I had no explanation for how or when this changed.

[megamantaray]

6 hours ago, nIn nIn nIn said:

For a while as a kid (can't remember the age) I was convinced that in the old days people saw in grey. not colour. Most non-fiction books were illustrated with black and white photos, so my dumb kid mind concluded that was how everyone actually saw back then. I had no explanation for how or when this changed.

Me too! I saw old pictures that had that sepia tint or black and white footage and I just figured in my head that's how the world was back then.

Even now when I think of something back in the 20s my brain makes it black and white.

[Mez558]

On 1/22/2020 at 11:45 AM, Alkpaz said:

Since this is LL, I'll share something sex related. For the longest time, after watching a movie with a man + woman having doggy-style sex, I believed that sex with a woman (making babies) meant doing it in the butt. It was not until I was a teenager that I figured it out. 

 

I was going to say "WTF were you doing watching porn at that age?"
 

But, I guess this is really the norm now.

 

I remember someone posting in the Get Stripped Again thread that they wanted the antagonists to be a group of young boys as when he was around 10 he often dreamed of fucking a 20yr old!?!

When I was 10 all I wanted was to be a Jedi.

Although to be fair, that probably lasted all the way up until the release of Episode 1.

 

Then I wanted to be a Sith.

 

What stupid thing did I believe when I was a kid? That I wouldn't grow old.

[megamantaray]

12 minutes ago, Alkpaz said:

It wasn't porn, but a movie, I think it may have been "Cat People". 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

I was pretty much exposed with "nudity" because this was the norm: (Note: this was a PG rated movie with full female nudity, and it was a-okay then)

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

Ah, the 80s. Casual rape as villain setup and full nudity.

I wasn't even sperm back then but my wife and I watch old movies all the time, mostly really bad ones those were the ones that had the most blatant nudism.

I wonder if I, or someone else, should make a thread to talk about the first experiences people had with nudity or porn.

That seems like a touchy subject if some people have bad memories as first exposures. Hmmm~

[Mr. Otaku]

59 minutes ago, Weyland-Yutani Corp. said:

You played Toonstruck probably

Lol no actually. I just didn't understand the fact that i was looking at fictional stuff so i automatically assumed that since they and their surroundings look so different from the real life, they must be living in an island where things look like that.

 

1 hour ago, Weyland-Yutani Corp. said:

When i was a child, i was believing that the moon, was one of those giant flying balloon, dont know how its called in english sorry, and that it was a man living in the woods behind my house that was inflate it to make the sky more clear and nice, i still like to imagine it like that, to not loose the magic we all had as childs

I think you mean hot air balloon. But i remember thinking for a while that the moon is a cookie lol.

[NickNozownik]

I believed that being an adult is the greatest thing ever because you can do whatever you want. Now I think that having a day off and enough money to get drunk is the definition of heaven.

[megamantaray]

24 minutes ago, NickNozownik said:

I believed that being an adult is the greatest thing ever because you can do whatever you want. Now I think that having a day off and enough money to get drunk is the definition of heaven.

Oof, too true.

"I can have a job, and I can help pay rent, and drive, and have sex and everything's gonna be fucking cool. I could buy so many video games."

 

If I could go back and show that kid a tax form to scare her straight, maybe teach her how to manage her expectations and not be complete [REDACTED] in school I would love to. She wouldn't do that differently because we're still incredibly stupid but maybe some different priorities would've helped, y'know? I hope in some other timeline I'm not nearly as bitter. Mind you I'm a pretty happy person in general but there's always those days when you want everything to explode and take you with it.

[steelpanther24]

Glad to hear I was not the only one who thought the opposite sex was "built" the same down there.  Thank goodness for the playboy smuggled into the elementary school library, but stupid steelpanther asking the boy who brought the playboy in "where is her dick?".......  yea, that memory (of embarrassment) is burned into my brain.   That sort of answers MMR's other question about first time exposed to porn. 

 

Second thing, thinking that politicians were only the best people of their chosen profession and all were solemn statesmen  (ADMIN, I am NOT talking politics as I am not pointing out anything pertaining to current politics) 

 

And this one is mostly for the US based users, thinking that Gerald Ford was a great president and somehow my dad worked for him since my dad sold Ford farm tractors.

 

There were more, but thankfully, my mind has suppressed the ones not associated with embarrassment.

[megamantaray]

15 minutes ago, steelpanther24 said:

Glad to hear I was not the only one who thought the opposite sex was "built" the same down there.  Thank goodness for the playboy smuggled into the elementary school library, but stupid steelpanther asking the boy who brought the playboy in "where is her dick?".......  yea, that memory (of embarrassment) is burned into my brain.   That sort of answers MMR's other question about first time exposed to porn. 

I think I will make that first exposure thread, it might be interesting.

That's silly though, the funny thing is watched Dragonball as a kid and I never put 2 and 2 together, Goku's baby dick was out a lot back then.

[ian_rich]

Chicks had dicks and the butthole was the only hole.

[landess]

Adult honesty.

 

Good example: 6th grade. The middle school music teacher stopped by the elementary school to recruit for school band 7th thru 9th (things were a bit different 44+ years ago).

 

I had always wanted to play Saxophone since hearing the Pink Panther cartoon theme by Henry Mancini. When advising the teacher, I was told to start on clarinet, and later I could switch to Sax. I found 'next year' the reason was they only needed 1 or 2 saxophonists, but many more to fill the woodwind section.

 

So I was LIED to - manipulated against my wishes instead of being told the simple truth, the positions were filled. WHY? Because the slimeball was worried Myself (and possibly others) wouldn't join band if we knew we wouldn't get to learn the instrument of choice.

 

Fuckin people lie about everything to achieve their goals. Learn it early - learn it well. You'll be glad you did.

 

 

Happy ending?  - I often sat in with the drum section when they were short handed, and by the 8th grade I hated the clarinet (stupid - but I was young), so during a 'disagreement', I was asked what I wanted to do. Play Drums! (BTW - in 6th grade we were told you needed a year of piano before accepted to the percussion section - MORE LIES!) So within 2 years I was sitting 1st seat in concert and marching bands as a drummer, had begun taking Bass lessons (thank you Alice Cooper), Played bass in HS jazz band while continuing drumming in the other school bands. Played in multiple rock bands as a senior and after graduation ( bass players were few or weak ass guitarists ). Yay!

 

So yeah - fuck adult honesty as a kid, because it never changes.

 

 

Honorable mention: After laying on my back and watching the sky, I had an epiphany! I could see the rotation of the earth by watching the clouds go by. When I told Mom, she explained it to me - Hope she wasn't lying.....

[2dk2c.2]

On 1/23/2020 at 12:19 AM, Reginald_001 said:

"That people are inherently good".

 

Took me 38 years to realize this is just not the case.

Can I direct your attention back to when you were kids and Jean Luc Picard kept telling aliens and foreigners that Earth used to be warlike,

Used to be greedy, but they eliminated poverty, greed, and the need for money.

There's a biggie star-trek movie missing, pointing out how that came about.

But by writing this I'm helping bury my own topic, "Gut feelings" 

Which (for example) is how kids know not to eat something they won't like, before they eat it.

I knew I'd upchuck that greasy lamb-stew, but the babysitter just thought I was being contrary, and my evil brother looked for any excuse to diss me.

Well he's dead, I'm not. So There, wise-ass.

OOOooo, all high and mighty because they knew how to take the crosstown bus and I didn't.

The grizzly guy told me that the bus was the same as the one I wanted, why shouldn't I believe him?

Or my grandmother telling me that raw eggs were good for you, 

and figs were delicious (most of my naivetes had to do with food.)

"Milk does a body good" yeah riiiight.

Fcking propaganda. Milk is poison. And for all the tax dollars they got, schools still made you pay a nickel (we were poor, so it was a nickel)

Remind me one day to tell you a story entitled "How much is that (mechanical toy) doggie in the window" and the good lady and the evil one putting different prices on something I could not afford.

The good lady gave me (false) hope, and the bad one dashed them to hell.

They're dead too!