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Corrupt A Wish


Ashal

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Posted
11 hours ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! oh shit, I did it again I can't use Addis Ababa. Damn! Okay, okay. You just have to go to Borobudur and you can have your salad without any menial tasks.

 

I wish I didn't have to take an insurance physical tomorrow.

(goodness I have no idea what an 'insurance physical' is(I assume it's an insurance thing))

 

Granted. You no longer have to do an insurance physical tomorrow however this leads to a series of events that inevitably leads you to fall down a flight of stairs, 6 steps high, exactly 6 hours after waking up that day and breaking exactly 6 bones (or just fracturing if you're lucky).

 

I wish I knew how to make wings out of wax that can actually make me fly.

Posted

GRANTED! if you want to relive the story of Icarus - so be it.

 

I wish none the people I meet today will mention Donald Trump.

Posted
18 minutes ago, Psalam said:

I wish none the people I meet today will mention Donald Trump.

G R A N T E D! ! ! 

 

every time they try to say — or even think about — "Donald Trump", a loud and fetid fart trumpets out of their arses. two minutes and 86 farts later, incapable of breathing and on the verge of a heart attack, you wish you'd taken that insurance physical.

i wish i weren't so sleepy all the time.

Posted
Quote
6 minutes ago, ZenBuddhist said:

G R A N T E D! ! ! 

 

every time they try to say — or even think about — "Donald Trump", a loud and fetid fart trumpets out of their arses. two minutes and 86 farts later, incapable of breathing and on the verge of a heart attack, you wish you'd taken that insurance physical.

i wish i weren't so sleepy all the time.

 

GRANTED! you will now sleep 23 hours daily and be wide awake and alert for one (kind of like a cat).

"I wish I were in the land of cotton ..."

Posted
30 minutes ago, Psalam said:

"I wish I were in the land of cotton ..."


G R A N T E D ! ! !
you doze-off after eating half a cow for lunch, and wake up as Confederate Maj. Gen. Gideon Pillow — whose battles and bravery can be read here — in the middle of the battle of Fort Donelson, Tennessee.


i wish i had a real wish for a change.

Posted
Quote
1 hour ago, ZenBuddhist said:


G R A N T E D ! ! !
you doze-off after eating half a cow for lunch, and wake up as Confederate Maj. Gen. Gideon Pillow — whose battles and bravery can be read here — in the middle of the battle of Fort Donelson, Tennessee.


i wish i had a real wish for a change.

 

GRANTED! you no longer need to quote old songs in order to have a wish (wait ...)

I wish that the activity streams on LL would start working again.

Posted
4 hours ago, Psalam said:

I wish that the activity streams on LL would start working again.

gRaNtEd.

But they are somehow strange. Instead of showing the activity that you did, they now show the activity that you WILL do. You have no choice but to comply to your activity stream ?

 

I wish I had a huge cold vanilla ice cream here with me at my desk right now :classic_happy:?❄️

Posted
Quote
1 minute ago, worik said:

gRaNtEd.

But thes are somehow strange instead of showing the activity that you did, they now show the activity that you WILL do. You have no choice but to comply to your activity stream ?

 

I wish I had a huge cold vanilla ice cream here with me at my desk right now :classic_happy:?❄️

 

GRANTED! of course you can't reach it. Now, you not only don't get your treat it melts and ruins your computer, keyboard and all the hard copies you have a month's worth of work which you will now to start over.

 

I wish it weren't raining (I think it's making me depressed).

Posted
33 minutes ago, Psalam said:

I wish it weren't raining (I think it's making me depressed).


GRANTED!

due to some Skyrim magic Worik spelt on you (due to some ice cream story), you're now in Barrow, AK, where you find 30 consecutive sunny days and sunny nights — no rain whatsoever!

i wish i'd win the NY Lotto 649 — just this once, really!

Posted
Quote
6 minutes ago, ZenBuddhist said:


GRANTED!

due to some Skyrim magic Worik spelt on you (due to some ice cream story), you're now in Barrow, AK, where you find 30 consecutive sunny days and sunny nights — no rain whatsoever!

i wish i'd win the NY Lotto 649 — just this once, really!

 

GRANTED! you have the good fortune to pick the winning numbers. Sadly, Worik's ice cream (by evil Skyrim magic) appears and melts all over the ticket making it illegible and therefore you will be unable to collect your winnings.

Posted
On 6/6/2019 at 4:07 AM, Psalam said:

By the way, I wish I might never have ice cream melt all over my stuff.

Granted. It spills on you instead and the next person to notice you will see that you're covered in sticky white stuff and immediately assume the worst.

 

I wish I had not succumbed to my own pride.

Posted
Quote
1 hour ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. It spills on you instead and the next person to notice you will see that you're covered in sticky white stuff and immediately assume the worst.

 

I wish I had not succumbed to my own pride.

 

GRANTED! you succumbed to sloth instead, or, maybe gluttony. Yeah, gluttony would be good.

 

I wish I had a little more motivation as I start today (speaking of sloth).

Posted
1 hour ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! you succumbed to sloth instead, or, maybe gluttony. Yeah, gluttony would be good.

 

I wish I had a little more motivation as I start today (speaking of sloth).

Granted. Strange, unusual creatures lurk in the shadows, ready to pounce on the dwindling and the lazy. They will continue to stalk you throughout the day until midnight... I hope this helps ^^

 

I wish I had more blackcurrant juice.

Posted
Quote
5 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. Strange, unusual creatures lurk in the shadows, ready to pounce on the dwindling and the lazy. They will continue to stalk you throughout the day until midnight... I hope this helps ^^

 

I wish I had more blackcurrant juice.

 

GRANTED! here you go:

Image result for blackcurrant juice

 

Now all you have to do is figure out who I really am and where I really live and come collect it before it goes bad.

 

I wish that I deal only with reasonable people today.

Posted
7 hours ago, Psalam said:

I wish that I deal only with reasonable people today.

Granted.

Mr. Spok and his whole family will be the only people you will talk to for the next 24h hours. Very reasonable folks.

spockfascinating.jpg

They find it fascinating to observe and probe and observe and probe all your emotional reactions to the various experiments they do with you.

 

I wish I had a bowl of fresh fruits  next to me, while I lounge on our couch and catch up with my  LL notifications of new stuff ?️

 

 

Posted
Quote
6 minutes ago, worik said:

Granted.

Mr. Spok and his whole family will be the only people you will talk to for the next 24h hours. Very reasonable folks.

spockfascinating.jpg

They find it fascinating to observe and probe and observe and probe all your emotional reactions to the various experiments they do with you.

 

I wish I had a bowl of fresh fruits  next to me, while I lounge on our couch and catch up with my  LL notifications of new stuff ?️

 

 

 

GRANTED! of course, all the air has been removed from the room but really enjoy the next 5 minutes!

 

I wish I really knew some Vulcans.

Posted
1 hour ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! of course, all the air has been removed from the room but really enjoy the next 5 minutes!

 

I wish I really knew some Vulcans.

Granted. A new civilization of humanoids has been discovered beneath several volcanic regions on earth, they dub themselves as Vulcans. They are questionably hot headed, with them having strange and unusual heavy weapons at their side almost all the time. Several attempts at communication have been met with the subject being blown to pieces... You have been tasked as a diplomat to ease the tension between Humanity and Vulcan and integrate them into our society. Good Luck.

 

I wish that chest in my room had some rare valuable inside it.

Posted
Quote
32 minutes ago, NitroHamlin said:

Granted. A new civilization of humanoids has been discovered beneath several volcanic regions on earth, they dub themselves as Vulcans. They are questionably hot headed, with them having strange and unusual heavy weapons at their side almost all the time. Several attempts at communication have been met with the subject being blown to pieces... You have been tasked as a diplomat to ease the tension between Humanity and Vulcan and integrate them into our society. Good Luck.

 

I wish that chest in my room had some rare valuable inside it.

 

GRANTED! you have that pocket of nth dimensional space in there. Sadly, you can't move it anywhere - if you did just think of all the things that would fall out!

 

I wish I had that kind of diplomatic skill.

Posted
5 minutes ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! you have that pocket of nth dimensional space in there. Sadly, you can't move it anywhere - if you did just think of all the things that would fall out!

 

I wish I had that kind of diplomatic skill.

 

 G R A N T E D ! ! ! 

you become a skilled ambassador; as a reward, your first mission (vouched by UN) is to establish diplomatic relations with a tribe of ferocious and anthropophagous native warriors in the dark Amazon Forest.


i wish i were able to Mod Skyrim.

Posted
Quote
4 minutes ago, ZenBuddhist said:

 

 G R A N T E D ! ! ! 

you become a skilled ambassador; as a reward, your first mission (vouched by UN) is to establish diplomatic relations with a tribe of ferocious and anthropophagous native warriors in the dark Amazon Forest.


i wish i were able to Mod Skyrim.

 

GRANTED! no, really! All you need to do is to spend 10000 hours watching videos, reading directions and playing with the wonky Creation Kit. Nothing to it! (Oh, and don't forget asking for help on LL - that will cut the time down somewhat).

 

I wish I were better at modding Skyrim (I know the answer I SHOULD get).

Posted
7 hours ago, Psalam said:

GRANTED! no, really! All you need to do is to spend 10000 hours watching videos, reading directions and playing with the wonky Creation Kit. Nothing to it! (Oh, and don't forget asking for help on LL - that will cut the time down somewhat).

 

I wish I were better at modding Skyrim (I know the answer I SHOULD get).

Granted. You are now the best at modding Skyrim... very special edition for the Amazon Echo.

 

I wish the Creation Kit was less... crashy.

Posted
1 hour ago, NitroHamlin said:

I wish the Creation Kit was less... crashy.

GRANTED! Whooooooosh! Now it is the most stable piece of software ever built! ?

Unfortunately Skyrim itself suddenly became the most bugged and crashy software on earth and won't merely start without a crash. ?

What have you done!:classic_ohmy:

 

I wish we will get back home today without spending an hour in a traffc jam. ?

Posted
Quote
2 hours ago, worik said:

GRANTED! Whooooooosh! Now it is the most stable piece of software ever built! ?

Unfortunately Skyrim itself suddenly became the most bugged and crashy software on earth and won't merely start without a crash. ?

What have you done!:classic_ohmy:

 

I wish we will get back home today without spending an hour in a traffc jam. ?

 

GRANTED! you will now only spend 45 minutes in a traffic jam but each of the other two will be over an hour (maybe two, who knows?)

 

I wish Doggy Daycare was open early today since Olga's still eager for activity even after her walk.

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