Corrupt A Wish

[Millicent Bystander]

granted, you now feel lucky about being dumb

 

 

I wish I didn't give up so easily

[Guest]

Granted, Now you have to work twice as hard.

 

I wish that I had more Gaming buddies.

[Guest]

granted but they are better at gaming than you.

 

I wish for a better memory

[Stross97]

Granted, but now you remember every second of every day for the rest of your life and, therefore, hold grudges easier.

 

I wish I could get some sleep.

[Nikiea]

Granted but you will never wake up.

 

I wish I have more free time.

[Guest]

Granted, But now the leisurely time is unbearably boring.

 

I wish that there was something I enjoyed that would make a career.

[peculiaris]

Granted, But now the leisurely time is unbearably boring.

 

I wish that there was something I enjoyed that would make a career.

Granted but it pays only 1 dolla a year

 

I wish I could fly with my mind.

[Guest]

Granted, But as a side effect of your new ability your IQ has been effectively halved.

 

I wish I didn't have crippling anxiety.

[Stross97]

Granted, now you're just plain crippled.

 

I wish I wasn't so easily depressed.

[Guest]

Granted, Now you're easily oppressed.

 

I wish that my Su-25 was faster.

[Millicent Bystander]

granted it's now falling out of the sky faster than it ever was.

 

I wish I knew what I was doing

[Guest]

Granted, now you know what you're doing wrong, but still otherwise clueless.

 

I wish I knew of a fulfilling purpose.

[Guest]

granted you now feel purposely fulfilled but bored.

 

I wish for a lotto win.

[Millicent Bystander]

granted, you get the bottom tier.

 

I wish I'd know that the bird is the word.

 

[Guest]

Granted, Now a man named peter annoys you incessantly.

 

I wish my brothers were not jealous of the green eyes I share with my father.

[Stross97]

Granted, now they're jealous of the brown eyes that you don't share with your cousins.

 

I wish I could post more often.

[Millicent Bystander]

granted you are now allowed to browse LL from your works computers

 

I wish that were actually feasible

[Guest]

Granted but you now only work 1 hour per week and must travel 200 miles to do so.

 

I wish my big toe didnt itch

[peculiaris]

Granted but you now only work 1 hour per week and must travel 200 miles to do so.

 

I wish my big toe didnt itch

 

Granted, Now your thumb is itching.

 

i wish for unlimited jelly beans!

[Millicent Bystander]

granted, but they are all those really dodgy flavours from Harry Potter.

 

I wish I'd been more productive this afternoon.

[Guest]

granted but you still havnt acheived what you wanted to

 

I wish for an apple pie

[Guest]

Granted, However the apples used in the pie were rotten.

 

I wish i had a block in excess of 600 Cubic Inches.

[Stross97]

Granted, you now have a block of 601 cubic inches.

 

I wish I could forget to remember. Remembering hurts...

[Guest]

Granted, Vodka works wonders.

 

I wish that I wasn't so incompetent so frequently.

[Millicent Bystander]

granted, now you are more incompetent more frequently

I wish I didn't hurt so much every time I woke up