Corrupt A Wish

[Guest]

Granted, However it is a nudist colony for saucy retirees. 

 

I wish Ivan would fix tank tracks faster.

[Millicent Bystander]

granted, Ivan is now the fastest at fixing roads torn up by tanks

 

I wish I had more time in the day

[Stross97]

Granted, but now it is 120 degrees constantly.

 

I wish I had more of a soul.

[Millicent Bystander]

Granted, you now have size 15 feet

 

I wish you were talking Fahrenheit not Celcius

 

[Stross97]

Granted, I was.

 

I wish I could fake my death and get away with it.

[Quillon]

Granted, but after faking death, you'll be eaten by Tyranosaurus due time anomaly, which sent you to prehistoric ages.

 

I wish, I was an unicorn.

[Guest]

Granted but now you're hunted by poachers

 

I wish I were a self generating sentient hologram

[Guest]

Granted, However you are immobile in a secret yet abandoned facility with no connection to the outside world.

 

I wish I could have more Vodka.

[Stross97]

Granted but you're in Russia on the morning of May 10, 1945.

I wish I would stop forgetting to post my fucking wish... Damn I'm stupid...

[Guest]

Granted, now you remember just as you post.

 

I wish that I had a full tank crew right now.

[Stross97]

Granted but they're all lemons.

 

I wish I could wish upon a star.

[Guest]

Granted, But now you're on Aegis VII.

 

I wish that I wasn't stressing out over trivial junk.

[Quillon]

Granted. But doctors have done complete lobotomy on you, so you don't care about anything.

 

I wish a incorruptible wish, which will grant me three incorruptible wishes, which all have 100% correctioncorrectio and cannot do mistakes

[Guest]

Denied, your wish is in direct violation of consecutive wishing clauses in the Genie EULA.

 

I wish the candle would stop lying to me.

[Stross97]

Granted, but now it is most trivial in answers.

 

I wish the susceptible weren't so.

[Guest]

Granted, But now the foundation has scooped you up and given you an SCP classification.

 

I wish I knew where the Tempest looms.

[Millicent Bystander]

Denied, Tempest's prefer to buy their fabric already made

 

I wish I didn't keep falling for other peoples promises

[Stross97]

Granted, now you're in my world, where nothing is trusted but you're met with constant disappointment.

 

I wish I didn't have to leave Wednesday.

[Quillon]

Granted, you are completely paralysed and you can't leave an time soon.

 

I wish I had servant right now.

[Stross97]

Granted, they can only serve you digitally, however.

 

I wish I wasn't alone.

[ThatSeasonsGal]

Granted, the ghost is always watching you 

 

I wish I had more wish ideas so that I could post here more often 

[Millicent Bystander]

denied, they shall be mine

 

I wish Aethy had already come up with some wishes so when I stole them I'd have some

[Stross97]

Denied, they were all taken by my ghost.

 

I wish I could blasphemy better.

[Guest]

Granted, when you get back we'll summon Satan with a toaster and a coloring book.

 

I wish that I couldn't be drove off so easily.

[Stross97]

Granted, Now you just get drove crazy.

 

I wish I would get wished some dumb-luck for a bit.