Ask A Lemming

[Ernest Lemmingway]

5 hours ago, Psalam said:

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Well, in that case, how are your cousins dealing with pink ice. The red algal blooms look pretty but I'm sure that has messed with their ecosystems (since they've already messed up their cooling systems).

They seem to have avoided that trouble by choosing to stay near a forest ranger's cabin that's taken over by a grizzly bear when the ranger leaves for the colder months. It's nowhere near the ice. If their show is any indication, they subsist almost entirely on chocolate spread and various junk foods. Like corn puffs that cause them to swell into bouncing balls when they eat one and take a sip of soda.

 

In effect, they've traded one source of trouble for another. That grizzly can be grumpy when he's trying to take a nap and they're bouncing all around that cabin.

[Psalam]

Lemming,

     I have been playing and enjoying Tyrant99's new mod SexLab Pheromones. And after being accosted by canines, bears and even rabbits it occurred to me that I was not being chased by lemmings. Of course, says I to myself, there are no lemmings in Skyrim. There are all sorts of other creatures from trolls to falmer and dragons, there are mods that introduce goblins, house cats and other beasties (including, as you've previously mentioned, jackalopes). Given what you've just been telling me about the natural habitat of lemmings it seems that Skyrim should be crawling with them. After all, there are no air conditioning units there with which to injure themselves.

     I know it's something of a philosophical quagmire but why are there still no lemmings (present company excluded of course) in Skyrim?

[Ernest Lemmingway]

3 hours ago, Psalam said:

     I know it's something of a philosophical quagmire but why are there still no lemmings (present company excluded of course) in Skyrim?

I think it's because Howard and Hines are species-ist against lemmings. Or they just didn't care enough to add us to the game. Either way, I'm kind of glad they didn't. Look at the low-res treatments other critters got! If they had rendered us in such lousy ways...well, if you've ever seen Critters 2, imagine that giant ball of krites.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agt3Dc1xPYM

 

And I can't figure out why that clip isn't embedding.

[Psalam]

S'alright. I just highlighted it and it gave me the option to watch the video - it certainly makes your point. Still, I would think that Mihail (just to mention one) could probably do your species justice.

[Ernest Lemmingway]

If a man is all alone somewhere with no women around for miles and he has an opinion, is he still wrong?

[worik]

11 hours ago, Ernest Lemmingway said:

If a man is all alone somewhere with no women around for miles and he has an opinion, is he still wrong?

? I might be tempted to say, that it depends on the circumstances:

By accident or bad luck - yes, he is wrong

by his own will - yes, he is double wrong

by orders of a single "she" - no, everything is perfectly right, as it should be so ? ( because his opinion is no relevant part of the picture anymore)

 

Furthermore, by years of empiric long-term observation a hypothesis can be added to your thesis

Quote

if one man is surrounded by many woman and has an opinion, it is almost certain, that he is wrong

In mathematical terms this was once formulated (in a student's pub, some decades ago, 1 night after a certain mathematical exam)

Spoiler

The combination of

man = 1

woman => 1

always results in

man's opinion = false

 

[Grey Cloud]

Then there is the corollary to that. A woman always has the last word in an argument. Anything a man says after that is the start of a new argument.

 

Men should take heart from something I was told many years ago: women are alright but you can't beat the real thing. I've had some great teachers. ?

[Psalam]

Spoiler

8 hours ago, worik said:

? I might be tempted to say, that it depends on the circumstances:

By accident or bad luck - yes, he is wrong

by his own will - yes, he is double wrong

by orders of a single "she" - no, everything is perfectly right, as it should be so ? ( because his opinion is no relevant part of the picture anymore)

 

Furthermore, by years of empiric long-term observation a hypothesis can be added to your thesis

In mathematical terms this was once formulated (in a student's pub, some decades ago, 1 night after a certain mathematical exam)

  Hide contents

The combination of

man = 1

woman => 1

always results in

man's opinion = false

 

 

 

So, if I have this right:

 

Integer Property Man Auto

Integer Property Woman Auto

 

Function Truth(Boolean)

 

If Man == 1 && Woman >= 1

     Return False

EndIf

[worik]

1 hour ago, Psalam said:

Spoiler

Integer Property Man Auto

Integer Property Woman Auto

 

Function Truth(Boolean)

 

If Man == 1 && Woman >= 1

     Return False

EndIf 

 

Aaah , someone is practising Papyrus-style Karate and demonstrates us in a quick Bunkai the practical use of it. Commendable!

 

For my simplyfied approach it might suffice. But back to @Ernest Lemmingway's original thesis

Quote

If a man is all alone somewhere with no women around for miles and he has an opinion, is he still wrong?

I think we also need a same-cell condition to be checked. Perhaps something like GetInSameCell() ? ?

... but forgive me my inaptitude in the Papyrus-style, a different function might be much better suited

 

[Psalam]

Spoiler

5 minutes ago, worik said:

Aaah , someone is practising Papyrus-style Karate and demonstrates us in a quick Bunkai the practical use of it. Commendable!

 

For my simplyfied approach it might suffice. But back to @Ernest Lemmingway's original thesis

I think we also need a same-cell condition to be checked. Perhaps something like GetInSameCell() ? ?

... but forgive me my inaptitude in the Papyrus-style, a different function might be much better suited

 

 

 

What about OnEvent ?

[worik]

29 minutes ago, Psalam said:

What about OnEvent ?

?What event would that be ? And who would call it when and how ? We don't have an event for an actor that triggers as soon as another actor is in the same cell, don't we?

Spoiler

I guess we don't have it. Since far too many mods check for exactly that condition and do it mostly in an expensive manner .... I think

 

[Psalam]

Spoiler

1 hour ago, worik said:

?What event would that be ? And who would call it when and how ? We don't have an event for an actor that triggers as soon as another actor is in the same cell, don't we?

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I guess we don't have it. Since far too many mods check for exactly that condition and do it mostly in an expensive manner .... I think

 

 

 

I'm pretty sure that we do (although I've never used it personally). No I was thinking more like

 

OnEvent (man opens his mouth)

If woman >= 1

   return false

Endif

[worik]

16 minutes ago, Psalam said:

No I was thinking more like

? Strictly speaking it is a new hypothesis to simplify the previous ones even further, but... at first glance it sounds very convincing

[Ernest Lemmingway]

The lemming has a question. Has anyone else ever had a dream that they were just some CGI created by the twisted minds of a pair of French-Canadians? Or worse, a hand puppet brought to life by some sad, lonely loser living in his parents' basement? Who may or may not be one of those French-Canadians?

[Grey Cloud]

7 minutes ago, Ernest Lemmingway said:

The lemming has a question. Has anyone else ever had a dream that they were just some CGI created by the twisted minds of a pair of French-Canadians? Or worse, a hand puppet brought to life by some sad, lonely loser living in his parents' basement? Who may or may not be one of those French-Canadians?

How can the second option be worse than than the first when the first contains two French-Canadians and the second only one? I suppose where the loser puts his hand could count for more than another French-Canadian.

To answer your question, no, or indeed non. I do however agree with U.G. Krishnamurti that we are just the thought of a thought.

[Psalam]

Spoiler

11 hours ago, Ernest Lemmingway said:

The lemming has a question. Has anyone else ever had a dream that they were just some CGI created by the twisted minds of a pair of French-Canadians? Or worse, a hand puppet brought to life by some sad, lonely loser living in his parents' basement? Who may or may not be one of those French-Canadians?

 

 

Of course. It's called "The Matrix." Or, more classically, Descartes' evil demon (but he was French, not French Canadian).

[Ernest Lemmingway]

The lemming has a request. Given what's happened to me lately, and my complete and utter lack of skill or patience with paint programs, I would appreciate it if anyone could take my pixel-composed mug and turn it pink. So folks can see how silly I look in that color! Not the color of my flesh; my skin tone is more of a salmon shade. But my fur when I can't get any blueberries...oh, that is another matter altogether!

[Guest]

Lemming. Post the picture you have in any suitable format.

I will turn it pink.

 

You can also add a Pantone or RGB color to suit your preferred pink color.

[Ernest Lemmingway]

 

The closest thing I give you to the specific shade I'm turning is the color code #cc3366.

 

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go watch the great cat whose fur color I now share. I knew I should have stocked up on blueberries but oh, no! I didn't want to throw out those fat-bellied stogie sucker steaks I still had left over! Now I'm just as pink-bellied as they are. ?

[Psalam]

Spoiler

14 hours ago, Ernest Lemmingway said:

 

The closest thing I give you to the specific shade I'm turning is the color code #cc3366.

 

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go watch the great cat whose fur color I now share. I knew I should have stocked up on blueberries but oh, no! I didn't want to throw out those fat-bellied stogie sucker steaks I still had left over! Now I'm just as pink-bellied as they are. ?

 

 

Are you watching 1) the classic films, 2) the remakes, 3) the cartoons or 4) all of the above? (Yes I had a lot of these type questions in training)

[Ernest Lemmingway]

2 hours ago, Psalam said:

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Are you watching 1) the classic films, 2) the remakes, 3) the cartoons or 4) all of the above? (Yes I had a lot of these type questions in training)

The cartoons. I can't find the originals on Netflix or Hulu and I'd rather see them before the remakes. Then again I am a cartoon so there's an element of solidarity there, too.

[Psalam]

Spoiler

1 minute ago, Ernest Lemmingway said:

The cartoons. I can't find the originals on Netflix or Hulu and I'd rather see them before the remakes. Then again I am a cartoon so there's an element of solidarity there, too.

 

 

I liked the cartoons when I was younger too, but I LOVED the movies. I hope you find them.

[Ernest Lemmingway]

I've been getting poked, prodded, and even a few offers for probing (I'm not into butt stuff, giving or receiving, thank you) about the relative lack of silliness in my Musings. My answer about that is I have no answer. Lately I just haven't been feeling silly. I'm watching cartoons like Looney Tunes, Pink Panther, Tom and Jerry, and even my idiot cousins. My funny bone is not being tickled and I don't know why. Even as I write this I've got Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner on and I feel...nothing. No zaniness, no absurdity, not even a mild chuckle at how the very laws of physics thwart poor Wile E.'s attempts at catching that bird. Or that rabbit; I don't even feel silly enough to make fun of my leporiphobia.

 

So, please. All you Burts, Mildreds, Andrews, and Janes, quit asking me about the lack of silliness lately. Besides which, I'm still trying to restore my natural color with a blueberry-rich diet. I feel great when I'm blue, but I feel blue when I'm pink. Imagine how confused I feel now that I'm more of a tie-dyed blue and pink pattern.

[Ernest Lemmingway]

The lemming has a question. Last night Melissa made me watch Night of the Lepus. Is she mad at me?

[worik]

3 hours ago, Ernest Lemmingway said:

Is she mad at me?

... maybe her way to get emotionaly bound towards you. ? The logic of female white mice is certainly multileveled, similar to quantum mechanics and probably even using more dimensions that the non-mice brain could ever imagine.

If that's the case, I hope you opened your inner soul and engaged into an emotional after-movie discussion/debate about the various aspects of terror ...

 

...

....

 

.. though ... while I am thinking about it...  neither movie nor discussion would leave room for a romantic end of the evening... ?️?

She has her period?