skyrim F20, I feel creepy for installing Skyrim Sex mods.

[skyrimmods37]

I'm Female 20 years old and due to health issues with my vagina I am unable to have Sex with my boyfriend and masturbate, I installed skyrim sex mods throughout the years to get an idea of what sex may be like, I know it's only a game but for some reason I feel creepy or somehow sexulising myself by installing these mods. ):

 

I'm going to assume no one will read this but I needed to talk about this somewhere and I feel like I can't tell anyone and not even my therapist what I'm feeling, I feel like if I was able to have sex like a normal functioning human being that I probably wouldn't have installed these mods in the first place..

 

Am I weird or creepy or somehow sexulising myself by installing these mods..

Edited October 10, 2024 by skyrimmods37

[Kabal460]

What you do in the privacy of your own home is no one else's business but your own. No need to feel creeped out. Doing so in public, well yeah, that is pretty creepy. 

[skyrimmods37]

3 minutes ago, Kabal460 said:

What you do in the privacy of your own home is no one else's business but your own. No need to feel creeped out. Doing so in public, well yeah, that is pretty creepy. 

Thank you for responding, I honestly wasn't really expecting anyone to respond, I don't know why I feel like this but I do.

 

Also what kind of person would play skyrim sex mods in public? Lmfao.

 

Thanks.

[AngiEXE]

Nah, don't worry about it.

 

We all have preferences and whatnot, even if the consensus is that they're 'creepy', it's a private matter anyway, do what you want. There are way worse things in the world than playing a game with some erotic mods, so don't beat yourself up over it :]

[davisev5225]

Unhappy people who can't get fulfillment out of their own lives tend to spend their time and effort trying to micromanage other people's lives.  These people like to shame others because it gives them a sense of superiority that partially fills the void in their own life.  Don't let those people dictate your own moral conscience to you.

 

Sex mods are a victimless action.  As long as you aren't breaking any laws (such as sexing up underage characters...), there's no reason to feel ashamed.

Edited October 10, 2024 by davisev5225

[BlaçkRaven_]

Everyone is in this site for its own reasons and even if we try here to rationalize others thoughts or opinions we cant truly understand how they feel as we all have our own backgrounds and emotional states.In the end what i can tell you is do what you feel that makes you even a little bit happy and dont let others judging you affect you so much.If you feel that being here ease up your emotions keep it up and if in the end you feel disturbed your best bet is always to talk to someone, being one you really trust or an expert.

[belegost]

5 hours ago, skyrimmods37 said:

Also what kind of person would play skyrim sex mods in public?

 

I do. I don't understand the question.

[Simpossible_xx]

6 hours ago, skyrimmods37 said:

Am I weird or creepy or somehow sexulising myself by installing these mods..

Not weird, not creepy, maaaaybe sexualizing yourself, but not in a weird nor creepy way.

[Laura]

I was in the same boat.

I've had a bad experience with sex and used Skyrim to explore it in a safe way. It took a while to find the mods that fit me but it helped me quite a bit. Sadly a lot of mods are objectifying or just straight up gloryfied abuse.

From time to time I still get feeling that this place isn't for me. But the people are nice and some mods are great. Hell, this site sucked me in so badly I'm now a longtime mod creator.

[Guest]

10 hours ago, skyrimmods37 said:

Am I weird or creepy or somehow sexulising myself by installing these mods..

Call me weird but I don't even see it as Sexualizing one's self, It is a game after all, I do things in Skyrim that I would never do in real life.

I see it as releasing a form of art, a vent if you will, and no, one does not have to be stimulated or achieve any type of Event to use these mods. You should feel like an adult who maybe wants to fulfill herself in a way that isn't going to bring mixed feelings of Inadequacy or Failure.

I am Sorry to hear of your issues with your body, one would think that could be solved by now through Medicine, Stem Cells, etc.

My point is be free, free yourself from ideas and thoughts imposed by Society and live a little, have some fun.

I turned 70 Today so I know how short life is, and how sad it can be to live by some other standards that aren't fully your own.

I wish you well, I am rooting for you!   

Edited October 10, 2024 by Raven 54

[Omnishade]

I'm just curious. Is physical handicap a common reason people use sex mods, or can it be just beacuse it's fun and you don't feel like having a partner atm?

[Guest]

1 hour ago, RoninDog said:

I'm just curious. Is physical handicap a common reason people use sex mods, or can it be just beacuse it's fun and you don't feel like having a partner atm?

For me It is a combination of age, injury, monetary & geographic.

I would love to have a relationship with a woman, but travel would cost me my monthly groceries, my injury & age is prohibitive as well so I live a solitary life now as do most my age.

Sucks but That's Life.   

You move to the country where life is slower, grow your own food, pay for a house over 30 years, then when you blink it becomes a trap, besides I have lost touch with most of the people I called Friends, nowhere to go even if I did sell out, no kids, no grandkids, no other family... just me. 

[Miauzi]

1 hour ago, Raven 54 said:

Nennen Sie mich komisch, aber ich sehe es nicht einmal als Sexualisierung der eigenen Person. Es ist schließlich ein Spiel, ich mache in Skyrim Dinge, die ich im wirklichen Leben nie tun würde.

Ich betrachte es als eine Art Kunst herauszubringen, wenn man so will, als Entlüftung, und nein, man muss nicht dazu angeregt werden oder irgendeine Art von Ereignis erreichen, um diese Mods zu nutzen. Sie sollten sich wie ein Erwachsener fühlen, der sich vielleicht auf eine Weise verwirklichen möchte, die nicht gemischte Gefühle von Unzulänglichkeit oder Versagen hervorruft.

Es tut mir leid, von Ihren Problemen mit Ihrem Körper zu hören. Man könnte meinen, dass diese inzwischen durch Medikamente, Stammzellen usw. gelöst werden könnten.

Mir geht es darum, frei zu sein, sich von den von der Gesellschaft auferlegten Ideen und Gedanken zu befreien und ein wenig zu leben und Spaß zu haben.

Ich bin heute 70 geworden und weiß daher, wie kurz das Leben ist und wie traurig es sein kann, nach anderen Maßstäben zu leben, die nicht ganz den eigenen entsprechen.

Ich wünsche dir alles Gute, ich drücke dir die Daumen! 

 

Well then - congratulations on this age

 

[Guest]

Just now, Miauzi said:

 

Well then - congratulations on this age

 

Let's see if I get this close to right...

Guten Tag

Danke

Danke schön

Danke, sehr aufmerksam

Vielen Dank 

Herzlichen Dank

You are very kind, that was the first wish of this day.

[Miauzi]

Vor 5 Stunden sagte Laura:

Ich saß im selben Boot.

Ich habe schlechte Erfahrungen mit Sex gemacht und habe Skyrim genutzt, um es auf sichere Weise zu erkunden. Es hat eine Weile gedauert, die Mods zu finden, die zu mir passen, aber es hat mir sehr geholfen. Leider objektivieren viele Mods Missbrauch oder verherrlichen ihn einfach nur.

Von Zeit zu Zeit habe ich immer noch das Gefühl, dass dieser Ort nichts für mich ist. Aber die Leute sind nett und einige Mods sind großartig. Verdammt, diese Seite hat mich so sehr in den Bann gezogen, dass ich jetzt ein langjähriger Mod-Ersteller bin.

 

I came to the forum in a completely different way... I had my sexual "coming out" almost 20 years before - and my psychotherapist congratulated me during my "confession" that I like fetishes (latex) and BDSM with a simple sentence:

"Girl, be glad that you are not dependent on the missionary position alone - you have so many more opportunities for fun and fulfillment than the other 95% of humanity!"

 

And from the beginning the aspect of "consensual" was always important to me - no matter what "crazy games" we played... in addition to the safety of everyone involved, mutual consent was always important.

 

Laura - I felt the same as you - I found mainly mods here in the forum that were very close to "abuse" ... and unfortunately I started to lose myself in it.

Ultimately, it is your mod and especially the stimulating discussions in the associated thread that made me return to my old path... thank you very much for that!

💖

 

Of course, I can implement things here in the virtual world - which I can unfortunately no longer practice in real life due to various illnesses ... and of course I can also push things from real life beyond their natural limits.

[belegost]

7 hours ago, Raven 54 said:

no kids, no grandkids, no other family... just me. 

Sounds like paradise.

[Guest]

It swings both ways....                   

Most of the time it doesn't bother me....

Edited October 11, 2024 by Raven 54

[Guest]

12 hours ago, Laura said:

Sadly a lot of mods are objectifying or just straight up gloryfied abuse.

 

7 hours ago, Miauzi said:

very close to "abuse"

I am with you all there, while I am a male I do not understand why the majority of mods seem like the intent is to hate on Women.

Some are no longer in my load order, others that I still use I just try to avoid those parts.

I guess the overall thought is if one wears kinky clothes they must be Dom/Sub and therefore fall into the abuse category, sad, very sad.

The mod I am currently playing, the maker was a Sadistic Ass.    

I hope it doesn't spread....

[Z0mBieP00Nani]

Assuming this is a real person and not a bot or something, there is nothing creepy about it. Maybe creepy wasn't the word you were looking for though, given the context? Most people would say they feel dirty for installing sex mods in their games or something like that. Other people might find it creepy if they knew what you are into, but that is the potential opinion of someone else, not yours. Everyone has their own tastes as far as what turns them on, and like others have said, what you do in private is your own business, as long as it doesn't involve victimizing or hurting someone else, either directly or indirectly.

[taffster74]

To the OP,

 

I'll admit, when I saw the title of this thread I had something completely different to say thinking the topic was going elsewhere. Typical stupid brain. lol 

 

Look, from a spiritual/psychological standpoint (and I'd like to think that your therapist would come to this conclusion also otherwise they ain't worth the money you're paying them), I think you'll find the creepiness you're feeling stems from shame. And that shame comes from the stigma of having the sexual disfunction you have and it is a social stigma that is not necessarily spoken out loud but is still there.  I'm gonna go a bit Christian here, forgive me, but I think it'll help you. There's the account of the woman with the Issue of Blood (can't tell you exactly where it is just that it's one of the gospels - John, I think). She'd had this affliction since she came into her "Maidenhood" - essentially, since she hit puberty - and nothing had worked to cure it. It's a rare syndrome that is present even today where the uterine lining won't hold so the woman basically is on her period 24/7. It also means she is unable to conceive. Back in the New Testament times, this was a huge thing as the inability of a woman to conceive meant she wasn't "complete" as a woman, she was less of a woman. And no doubt, you've been feeling that way yourself. It also meant that she was deemed to be permenant;ly "Unclean" - socially stigmatized, ostracized and untouchable. Anyway. She must have lived pretty close to the public square where Jesus was teaching as she heard him and decided - bugger it, I'm gonna ask him to heal me. To hell with the consequences of getting caught (this would have meant being exiled from the country). By the time she had gotten herself ready, Jesus was already on the move to heal the daughter of Jairus. Instead of giving up, she decided to chase after Jesus, thinking "If I could just touch the hem of his cloak, I will be healed." Well, she did. Immediately, Jesus stopped and asked who touched him., to which ihis apostles said, "But master, you're in a crowd - everyone's touching you." But Jesus said, "No, I felt a measure of healing leave me." At this point, the woman came forward and told her story. Jesus responded to her saying "Woman, your Faith has made you whole."  Yes she was already healed, Jesus had already stated this. But what he actually meant was that she was clean, she was complete as a woman. I'm only using this as an example. You don't have to become a Christian just because of this. Becoming a Christian is your personal choice and has nothing to do with me. What I'm saying is this - there are a lot of social stigma's regarding sexual disfunction and they do play on our psyche. Even if no-one actually says anything, more often than not its us who impose those stigmas on ourselves. Video gaming is just fantasy. What we do in it is also fantasy. Use that fantasy. In your case, use it a pyschological and emotional healing. Stop feeling ashamed of yourself for something that is no fault of yours. Stop beating yourself up, for it. I'm male, pushing 50, A Christian, I play the sims 4 (basically, a doll house on computer) and I use mods from this site. Really, big whoop-de-do. I know this is is just fantasy. I would never do or expect anything like what happens in the game in real life - real life just doesn't work like that. Yeah, I know there - supposedly - clubs for that kind of thing, but I'm just too damn shy and embarrassed to even consider looking into it - lol. Find who you are. Learn to love who you are. Embrace who you are.

[skyrimmods37]

On 10/12/2024 at 1:24 PM, Z0mBieP00Nani said:

Assuming this is a real person and not a bot or something, there is nothing creepy about it. Maybe creepy wasn't the word you were looking for though, given the context? Most people would say they feel dirty for installing sex mods in their games or something like that. Other people might find it creepy if they knew what you are into, but that is the potential opinion of someone else, not yours. Everyone has their own tastes as far as what turns them on, and like others have said, what you do in private is your own business, as long as it doesn't involve victimizing or hurting someone else, either directly or indirectly.

Yes sorry, creepy was probably not the best word to use, it's more so shame that I'm feeling.

[landess]

I like to look and I'm not ashamed of that.

 

I do exercise self discipline in public so as not to make others feel uncomfortable with unnecessary stares or others acts which create public scenes. In other words I respect others and try to do as little as possible to upset them.

 

Once in the privacy of my own home I'm free to 'look' as much as I want. While my days of playing Skyrim are long past, I have fond memories of the sexual mods which kept my interest in a game long past it's expiration date. Now I pretty much only play the Sims 3 with a hyper sexualized mod list which allows me an adult/mature experience while also having the characters go about their 'lives' in a normal fashion.

 

I learned to accept who I am long ago and just went with it. I'm happier for that and really don't care about what others might speak of between themselves. People talk - that will never stop. I don't worry about it because I'm not doing anything illegal and have enough intelligence to keep it within the proper circles.

[Gray User]

9 hours ago, skyrimmods37 said:

Yes sorry, creepy was probably not the best word to use, it's more so shame that I'm feeling.

 

I will share something that maybe helps you (with bad english). 

 

I am in happy relationship, but also have things I like that are not possible or safe. I do not try to do them in life, but I put them in my games. 

 

Some of them are sex things, but some are not. Most games are about things you cannot and should not do in life (stealing, killing). Just as how I can play skyrim and still know not to go into places in life to kill all the people and take all their things, I can has sex mods as part of skyrim and know that I should not have sex with large animals or be captured by bandits in life. 

 

I think shame is good to keep you from doing bad things in life, but do not feel shame about your thoughts and what you do in a game that takes place in your computer and your mind and has no other people. But also do not think that because you do something in a game means it is a good idea in life. 

[JimUpdating]

14 hours ago, skyrimmods37 said:

Yes sorry, creepy was probably not the best word to use, it's more so shame that I'm feeling.

please don't go down the path I went for decades. Having to hide and not even talk about my sexuality as some countries I've worked would view anything non-binary/queer as illegal crippled me emotionally for too long.

 

Talk with the therapist, or get a new one even if just for a single session, with the heart in mouth moment of having to say that you have a medical issue.

 

See if there is a kink/bdsm/pride brunch or festival in your country. It will be a big step, but you may find some wonderful people and workshops and discussions where traditional stuff and shame are left at the door.

[porkybork]

I’m going to echo much of what was already said in this thread by saying that there’s nothing with what you’re doing. I’d argue that Skyrim, and video games in general, can be a really good way to safely explore your sexuality. You can download mods that pique your curiosity, and you can just delete whatever content makes you uncomfortable.

 

So long as you don’t use games to do anything illegal or play them in public, there’s nothing to really worry about.