Love and Hate- Why do so Many People feel BOTH for Each Other?

[Jazzman]

Well, love (or hate) is just a word to describe a felt condition, a pole that has an antipole (thesis and antithesis).

Once we think in a mere bipolar way - good and evil, black and white - we inevitably ignore the infamous 50

shades of grey b/t the two antagonistic conditions we actually have terms for. That's a phenomenon in modern,

networked societies, adaptation to internet slang that has shifted from like and dislike to love and hate. Problem

is, this easily leads to confusion in talks /w folks that still use the sophisticated distinctions of the shades of grey.

 

So when you feel both love and hate for someone, you're in the instabil radical middle of the bipolar interval of

thinking which is truly short compared to one that has these proverbial 50 shades of grey implemented, a victim

of a reduced, modern vocabulary. At least that's how I see it. Question is, who benefits from it...

 

Have a good one!

[KoolHndLuke]

Okay, here's the thing. I was in a relationship years ago and I really think I loved her very much some of the time. But, then other times- possibly because of how much I cared about and trusted her- I would quite literally hate her because she liked to argue about everything!! She just thought she had the fuckin' answer for it all and knew how to cut me deep when I disagreed with her (which I did often). So, over time I learned to ignore her jibes and this infuriated her to the point that she would reach lower and lower to try and get a rise outta me- to the point of being ridiculous. Anyone that heard our arguments were appalled by our extremely hateful and downright dirty exchanges while we would turn around in a few minutes and talk about the weather or something. What's weird is that this was kinda normal for us since we had long ago learned each other's measure- and dare I say it was "fun" up to a certain point- sorta like an exercise or something to test each other. It suited me because I came from that kind of family. The fights between me and my mother and brother are almost legendary (the local police know our name well).

 

So, my point here is that in our extreme (sick) competition we could sometimes bring each other to the point of extreme hatred and violence (I slapped her once and she said she would cut my dick off while I was sleeping for example), but, then turn around later and think nothing of it (we rarely made up because we both knew it was pointless). I think we had a much better understanding of each other because of this. I know she cared about me and I cared about her- but, I don't know if you could call what we had "love" or not. I do know that if anything happened to one of us- the other would be right there to back them up. It's really fucking strange- isn't it?

[ISNAN]

There is actually a new theory about what emotions are and where they come from...Theory of constructed emotion

 

An emotion is basically made up of 3 ingredients. Interoception (signals coming from your body to your brain to let it know something is wrong.), concepts you have about the emotion, and your social reality (how your culture views those emotions which leads to your upbringing in how you interpret those emotions.( how you view happiness based on what you learned about it through social interactions)).

 

So given this, an emotion is made "on the fly" or in the moment. Let's say you stub your toe. Your toe sends a signal to your brain. The concepts you have about pain determines how intense or potent the emotion is. The social reality determines how you react to that pain. 

 

At the end of the day, an emotion is just an illusion. Our brains needs to have some type of response system so it knows when something is wrong in the body. The byproduct of that is what gives us our sense of self, our "I", because the the brain needs to be "aware". The problem we get into is not realizing this basic function of the brain and misinterpreting it as something more. We make the emotion more complex than what it is because of our concepts about emotions. If you feel sad, you immediately think something external is causing it instead of something internal. It may just be that you are lacking a certain mineral or vitamin.

[2dk2c.2]

On 11/8/2018 at 5:30 AM, KoolHndLuke said:

Okay, here's the thing. I was in a relationship years ago and I really think I loved her very much some of the time. But, then other times- possibly because of how much I cared about and trusted her- I would quite literally hate her because she liked to argue about everything!! She just thought she had the fuckin' answer for it all and knew how to cut me deep when I disagreed with her (which I did often). So, over time I learned to ignore her jibes and this infuriated her to the point that she would reach lower and lower to try and get a rise outta me- to the point of being ridiculous. Anyone that heard our arguments were appalled by our extremely hateful and downright dirty exchanges while we would turn around in a few minutes and talk about the weather or something. What's weird is that this was kinda normal for us since we had long ago learned each other's measure- and dare I say it was "fun" up to a certain point- sorta like an exercise or something to test each other. It suited me because I came from that kind of family. The fights between me and my mother and brother are almost legendary (the local police know our name well).

 

So, my point here is that in our extreme (sick) competition we could sometimes bring each other to the point of extreme hatred and violence (I slapped her once and she said she would cut my dick off while I was sleeping for example), but, then turn around later and think nothing of it (we rarely made up because we both knew it was pointless). I think we had a much better understanding of each other because of this. I know she cared about me and I cared about her- but, I don't know if you could call what we had "love" or not. I do know that if anything happened to one of us- the other would be right there to back them up. It's really fucking strange- isn't it?

I dream of people (really, I just had one) who role-play BDSM but hate people who get pissed for whatever reason and try to hurt you.

Maybe it was something I said, maybe I didn't agree with vegan-religion, maybe I have the social-skills of a wart, but I never liked that person, always jabbing at me to prove a point.

 

But people who "drive" you to places you've never been are so hot. 

Looks help, but that's not it either, good drivers know how to drive so well, their charges love them despite the dings and scratches and the need to be washed....

I think I carried the analogy too far, plus I'm deliberately avoiding a more generic forum.

But yeah, self-confidence is a turn--on, leadership abilities.

Bitchiness is not.

 

I knew someone like that.

 

It's sunday morning here, and I was drinking tea and passing time re-reading.

Your posts put pictures in my head.

Others quoted books and deep philosophies (in a related thread,) and this time I actually stopped to google some of their terminology.

And I concluded, "And yet, they are here", not curing disease or saving mankind from themselves.

It's a pattern, and very little of what is actually said matters, it's the interaction, I'm thinking.

Not that I would know, this place would be full of unanswered posts if I were the only type of person to answer.

They killed five minutes quoting from some quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore.

Some are going for inscrutable, others for that really annoying animated-gif thing, (only with words).

We're all passing time. 

The message gets lost if there ever was one.

Begone, shit-magnet.

[Pork Type]

This proto-post was just too toxic. Sorry! Nothing to see here.

[Pork Type]

8 hours ago, 2dk2c.2 said:

But people who "drive" you to places you've never been are so hot. 

You don't sound like you've ever been in any sort of REAL existential peril.

 

Ever been mugged? Had a knife pulled on you?

 

Believe me. I never felt "hot" any time I got mugged/subjected to armed robbery.

[2dk2c.2]

1 hour ago, Pork Type said:

You don't sound like you've ever been in any sort of REAL existential peril.

 

Ever been mugged? Had a knife pulled on you?

 

Believe me. I never felt "hot" any time I got mugged/subjected to armed robbery.

why me? is it because I'm here?

"Pissed and trying to hurt you", quoting my mind from a  few hours ago, is NOT a desirable thing.

(PS) the vegan must be 60 by now, or dead.

 

[Pork Type]

15 minutes ago, 2dk2c.2 said:

why me? is it because I'm here?

"Pissed and trying to hurt you", quoting my mind from a  few hours ago, is NOT a desirable thing.

(PS) the vegan must be 60 by now, or dead.

 

???

 

Yes. It's because you're here.

 

You get to explain the rest. But sober up first!
 

[dagobaking]

I think there is a difference between love/hate relationship and people who used to love each other but now hate.

 

Sorry. But, the love/hate thing is just insecure people who don't believe "regular" affection enough, so invent drama that they can feel.

[KoolHndLuke]

On 4/17/2019 at 1:53 AM, dagobaking said:

insecure people

And whom exactly is "secure" again? It isn't anyone I know. 

[2dk2c.2]

On 4/19/2019 at 7:51 PM, KoolHndLuke said:

And whom exactly is "secure" again? It isn't anyone I know. 

I was sort of hoping *you* were, 

if *you're* insecure we're fucked.

O wait,

Confident but self effacing and not dogmatic,

yay.

(If you read my really bad compiment with no sarcasm or implied-whatever, it sounds really cool, I swear)

 

 

 

[Mr. Otaku]

It's because likeness towards someone is a sum of many parts. Meaning, you can love one thing about someone but hate something else about them. This goes for each aspects of a person, and the sum total of it all is what decides if you like someone or not. If there are more things you love about someone than there are things you hate about them, then you'll most likely like that person as a whole and vice versa.

 

Pretty simple.

[Darkpig]

I read love and hats. Please be love and hats.

[Pork Type]

On 4/24/2019 at 4:09 PM, Darkpig said:

I read love and hats. Please be love and hats.

I Hate Hats

[Darkpig]

8 minutes ago, Pork Type said:

I Hate Hats

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!? That is like saying you hate ice cream. Let me guess you hate ice-cream too? Come-on We all scream for icecream HAHAHAHAHAHA- *cough* anyway, Whats wrong with hats?

[Pork Type]

27 minutes ago, Darkpig said:

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!? That is like saying you hate ice cream. Let me guess you hate ice-cream too? Come-on We all scream for icecream HAHAHAHAHAHA- *cough* anyway, Whats wrong with hats?

I love Cadbury Flake Ice cream cones, but I'm not moving to that country. Because I hate their hats. Also, Authoritarianism.

[Darkpig]

10 minutes ago, Pork Type said:

I'm not moving to that country. Because I hate their hats. Also, Authoritarianism.

I think think their hats are adorkable. As for authority and leaders I don't know much about that. All I know is that the royal family has expensive vacations and America is off building a useless wall. Both are expensive but I'd say one of them has the right idea. Nuff about worldly antics, we are talking about hats. Is it that particular hat that scares you off or is it all hats?

[Pork Type]

39 minutes ago, Darkpig said:

I think think their hats are adorkable. As for authority and leaders I don't know much about that. All I know is that the royal family has expensive vacations and America is off building a useless wall. Both are expensive but I'd say one of them has the right idea. Nuff about worldly antics, we are talking about hats. Is it that particular hat that scares you off or is it all hats?

I'm particularly offended by The Chestergate, The dip upon the top is particularly suggestive of the frenular region of the Glans Penis. It's as if, by wearing it, you're literally a dickhead. And a bellend, at that.

 

 

[Darkpig]

20 minutes ago, Pork Type said:

I'm particularly offended by The Chestergate, The dip upon the top is particularly suggestive of the frenular region of the Glans Penis. It's as if, by wearing it, you're literally a dickhead. And a bellend, at that.

Everything is a dick if you think about it. I bet you I could turn any fruit or vegetable into a sexual object. In fact if it weren't for penises nobody would exist so people should be celebrating penises (and vaginas). Maybe it is the whole culture of sex shaming that makes humanity so funny.

[Pork Type]

1 hour ago, Darkpig said:

Everything is a dick if you think about it. I bet you I could turn any fruit or vegetable into a sexual object. In fact if it weren't for penises nobody would exist so people should be celebrating penises (and vaginas). Maybe it is the whole culture of sex shaming that makes humanity so funny.

 

[Captain Cobra]

8 hours ago, Darkpig said:

I bet you I could turn any fruit or vegetable into a sexual object.

Fruits are basically bloated vaginas that have already been cummed inside.

[Darkpig]

10 hours ago, Pork Type said:

(Dick festival)

This is why I love Japan. They just love their festivals. I actually saw something similar to this on youtube.

Spoiler

 

 

3 hours ago, Captain Cobra said:

Fruits are basically bloated vaginas that have already been cummed inside.

You're thinking of twinkies but whatever, I consider that close enough.

[Pork Type]

On 4/26/2019 at 2:16 PM, Captain Cobra said:

Fruits are basically bloated vaginas that have already been cummed inside.

Well thanks very much for ruining peaches for me, forever

[Pork Type]

5 minutes ago, Alkpaz said:

Would that include canned peaches?

The peach (Prunus persica) is a deciduous tree native to the region of Northwest China between the Tarim Basin and the north slopes of the Kunlun Mountains, where it was first domesticated and cultivated.^[3] It bears an edible juicy fruit called a peach or a nectarine.

The specific name persica refers to its widespread cultivation in Persia (modern-day Iran), from where it was transplanted to Europe. It belongs to the genus Prunus which includes the cherry, apricot, almond and plum, in the rose family.

 

In fact... A perfectly ripe, tasty peach is one of those things that keeps me from killing myself.

[Guest]

Why do people feel anything at all? It's biochemistry baby! If you want my view on "love and hate", I think people have a pretty weird notion of what "hate" is. For example, if I really, really dislike someone, I want nothing to do with them. I don't want to bug them or hurt them in any way, I just want nothing to do with them. I don't care about them at all.

 

Hate on the other hand, at least most people's idea of it seems to be more of an obsession and for that reason, I think it has a lot in common with love. Hate is basically the same as love, except instead of wanting to cause pleasure for the other person, you want to cause pain. And with that being said, I hate absolutely nobody.