(Next Morning)

(Windhelm Docks)
Sofia: Why did he pick 2 freezing cold places to wear skimpy clothing?

Sofia: Its freezing.
Emily: Well Windhelm is the best place to sell Nord armor, so this was the next best place.

Emily: Now lets go sell this Nord Plate Bikini Armor.
Sofia: Okay.

Emily: Hey Scouts, you like the armor you got?
Scouts-Many Marshes: Oh yes, it looks quite good on some of the girls i've got. Could i maybe ask for another round.
Emily: Maybe another time.

Emily: Wanna get a chainmail version?
Scouts-Many Marshes: Oh, that sounds sexy, sure why not.

Sofia: So what do you think?
Shahvee: Sorry.

Shahvee: Not interested, too cold around here.
Sofia: Okay, thanks.

Emily: Hello Neetrenaza
Neetrenaza: Oh, that's some skimpy armor you got there Emily.
Emily: Thanks, want some?

Neetrenaza: No thanks, i don't know anyone who'd want to wear i-OH GODS!!!
Emily: What!
Neetrenaza: I see a Dagon in a bikini.
Emily: .....Skooma?
Neetrenaza:......maybe.

Kjar: Sorry, while that does look nice i don't need such armor for my female crew members.

Sofia: Okay, thank you for your time.....wheres your drink?
Kjar: What drink?

Emily: Hello woul-
Stands-In-Shadows: No.

*Background* Emily: you could at l-
*Background* Stands-In-Shadows: No.
Sofia: Would you like to buy some steel bikini armor?

Imperial Guard: Hmm...well it looks good, sure, i'll buy one.
Sofia: Thanks.

Emily: Okay lets head inside.
Sofia: Why'd that guy keep ignoring you?
Emily: Because he's a dick.

Emily: Lets split up then meet back in the Market okay.
Sofia: Alright.

Sofia: Hel-
Faryl: Yes.

Sofia: How did yo-
Faryl: Emily a year ago, that chainmail looks nice, so i'll take it.
Sofia: Excellent.

Emily: Hello mam, would you like some armor.
Commoner: Hmmm.

Commoner: Looks pretty good, sure i'll take one.
Emily: Thanks.

Sofia: Want some Armor?
Viola: Oh that armor looks nice.

Viola: Sure i'll take one, that way i won't be killed if another killer shows up.
Sofia: Sure i...wait what?

Emily: So, would you like some Nord Bikini armor?
Imperial Guard: Hm? Um....

Imperial Guard: Sure, it'll be a nice surprise for my girlfriend.
Emily: Perfect, just let Oengul know.

Emily: Hello sir, could i interest you in some Nord Plate Bikini Armor?

Noblemen: You certainly can. And might you be available yourself?
Emily: Sorry not today.

Sofia: Sir would you like some Bikini armor.
Commoner: Looks ineffectual.

Sofia: Okay so i'-
Commoner: I didn't say no.

Sofia: Hello Miss, would you like some Nord Plate Bikini Armor?
Noblewoman: Oh!

Noblewoman: My husband would love that, sure.
Sofia: Great.

Emily: Hello Sir would you like some armor?
Noblewoman: Oh, that's a nice ass.

Knight Guard: No, that won't ever protect you in a real fight.
Emily: As a nudist, i'm gonna say you're 100% wrong.

Emily: Would you like some Nord Plate Armor.
Commoner: No i want some serious armor.

Emily: You don't Have to wear this in battle you know? You can fuck in it too.
Commoner: Hmm....i'll think about it.

Sofia: So what do you think?
Imperial Guard: Well you look pretty good in it.

Imperial Guard: Sure, but got a thicker version?
Sofia: It comes in a bunch of variations, just ask your Local blacksmith in a few days.
Imperial Guard: I will, thank you.

Sofia: Hello Good sir, would you like some sexy armor.

Imperial Guard: That armor looks impractical.

Imperial Guard: But.....i guess.

Imperial Guard: It wouldn't hurt to get some for a few friends.
Sofia: Great, just let the Blacksmith know, it'll be available soon.

Emily: Weren't you that asshole in Markarth.
Merchant: No, that was one of my Quadruplet brothers.

Merchant: You look great in that armor by the way.
Emily: Thanks.

Merchant: I'll take one.
Emily: Great, i'll let the blacksmith know.

Adventurer: Are you sure this will protect me?
Sofia: Absolutely.

Sofia: I got a friend who's a nudist and she's not dead yet, fights pretty well, so surely you'd be fine too.
Adventurer: Very well, i'll take a few.

Emily: Hello Niranye, how's business?
Niranye: Good, selling armor again?
Emily: Yep.

Emily: Slightly different version than last time. Want it?
Niranye: Sure.
Nilsine: Oh, looks good. I'll take one.

Nilisine: Where can i buy it.
Emily: From Oengul in a few days.
Nilisine: Great.

Emily: By the way Niranya.

Emily: Why is half of your display on the floor.
Niranya: I don't even know anymore.

Emily: Hello Hillevi, wants some armor.
Hillevi: No.
Emily: Still mean i see.

Emily: Hey Aval how's the floating meats?
Aval: Not so good, they stopped floating.

Emily: I see, want some armor to help you sell then?
Aval: Sure.
Emily: Great, also...

Emily: You just gonna leave the meat on the ground like that.
Aval: Yep, adds flavor.
Emily: Gross.

Sofia: Hey Emily, any luck.
Emily: Mostly, some pretty rude people here, got about eight sales, you?

Sofia: Seven.
Emily: Nice, now lets go Talk to Oengul.

Emily: hey Oengul.
Oengul: oh, Hello Emily, brought a friend i see.

Emily: Yep, we wanted to show you the new updated armor.
Sofia: What do you think.

Oengul: Well it looks nice.

Oengul: Very nice.

Oengul: Sure, i'll keep selling it.

Oengul: Especially that Chain-mail.
Emily: Great, i'll let Alvor know.

Emily: Okay lets go to the boats, we gotta get to Solstleim.

Emily: Hey Gjalund, can we go on a day trip.
Gjalund: Sure, but we can't go back till tomorrow.
Emily: That's fine.

(Solstheim)
Emily: Alright.

(Ravenrock)
Emily: We're here.

Sofia: Not as Desolate as i expected that's good.
Emily: Yep.

Emily: Now lets go sell this Ebony Bikini Armor.
Sofia: Okay!

Sofia: But first can i take off this helmet, it messes up my hair too much.
Emily: Sure, i'll keep mine on, we gotta show off the helmet.
Sofia: Okay.

Emily: Alright, now lets start selling this ebony armor.

Emily: Hi Noir?
Noir: Emily, didn't expect you to be back so quick.
Emily: Just selling some armor. Interested in Ebony Bikini Armor.

Noir: Ebony Bikini Armor huh? looks pretty good.

Noir: Thanks, i'll buy some.
Emily: Great, just let the Blacksmith later on.

Emily: Hey cutie, want some ebony bikini armor for a girlfriend or wife.
Redoran Guard: No.

Emily: Aw don't be like that, you know you want to see someone walking around in this.
*sticks chest out*

Redoran Guard: .....very well.
Emily: Still weak to seduction huh?

*Background* Redoran Guard: Just shut up.
Sofia: So how about it, this armor interest you.

Redoran Guard: Well its made pretty well.

Redoran Guard: Sure, i'll buy one.
Sofia: Great.

Sofia: There's not a lot of people around.
Emily: yeah Ravenrock isn't very popular but we can still get business here.

Sofia: Whoa?
Emily: Relax its just a Guar.

Emily: This one has been tamed, so we can ride on it.
Sofia: Oh, i might want to try that sometime.

Emily: Hey Glover.
Glover: Emily, that's some nice Ebony armor you got there.

Glover: Looks really good on you two.
Sofia: Thanks, we're selling it, might you be interested in selling this armor too.
Emily: I'll take it you have interest in this armor, it'd sell well here.

Glover: Well.

Glover: They do look really nice, and with the mines open it'll make even more business.

Glover: Sure, i can start selling it it.
Emily: Alright, i'll let Alvor know.

Emily: Hello Milore.
Milore: Hello Emily, what's with the armor.

Emily: We're selling Ebony Bikini Armor, would you like to buy one to show off to your husband.
Milore: From you, sure.
Emily: Great.

Garyn: Emily, hello, back so soon.
Emily: Just a day visit. Selling armor.
Garyn: Oh, I was surprised, i thought you stopped being a nudist.
Emily: Heh, nope, by the way, your wife will surprise you in a few days with some armor.
Garyn: Oh? What do you-Oooooh!...... I can't wait.

Emily: Hey Fethis, wanna buy some armor.
Fethis: Armor.

Fethis: Oh....well.

Fethis: That does look very nice.

Fethis: Sure, i'll buy a few.

Fethis: Since you are here, you wanna join us tonight like old times.
Emily: Mmmm, maybe another time.
Sofia: join us?

Emily: I'll tell you later, lets go into the Tavern.
Sofia: Okay.

Emily: Hello there.

Sofia: It's really nice, you could get some cute girls to wear it.

Emily: Would you like to buy some sexy Ebony Bikini Armor.

Mogrul: Why would i ever buy such stupid looking armor. Get out of my face.

Sofia: Excuse me asshole we are just selling the armor, no need to be a prick about it.
Mogrul: Only a fool would wear that armor in battle.
Emily: Says the only weak Orc i've ever met.

Mogrul: Slitter.
Slitter: Sorry ladies, but you need to go, Mogruls quite agitated.
Sofia: The fuck do i care if he's angry.

Sofia: I have half a mind to kick his teeth in.
Slitter: Please don't, i don't feel like fighting today.
Emily: No need, we'll talk to so-
Slitter: Wait.

Slitter: I never said i didn't want that armor.

Slittler: Where can i get it, i want to for my girlfriend.
Sofia: Oh.
Emily: Ask Glover, he'll help you out.
Slitter Thanks.

Sofia: Hello sir, Would you like some armor.

Slitter: No thanks, i don't have anyone to wear it.
Sofia: Okay.

Emily: Hello Drovas, would you like some armor.
Drovas: Hmm.

Drovas: I would, but i don't have anyone at the time, maybe another time.
Emily: Okay, thank you for your time.
Drovas: and thank you for ridding us of those bandits again.
Emily: Heh, no trouble at all.

Dreyla: Oh my, what armors are those.
Sofia: Ebony Bikini Armor.
Emily: Would you like to buy one Dreyla?

Dreyla: Sure, i wanted something sexy to wear to help my dad out.
Emily: Okay....wait, your dad might already have them.
Dreyla: I'll take it still, seems like theres multiple variations.
Emily: Great,

Sofia: Hello there Ma'am would you like to buy some Ebony Bikini Armor.
Aphia: Bikini Armor huh?

Aphia: Sure, what other variations are there.
Sofia: Well there is a few.

*background* Sofia: Like Dwarven, steel,...
Emily: Hey Geldis, how are you doing?
Geldis: Good, what are you up to?

Emily: Selling armor, would you like some.
Geldis: hmmm, i could get some of the workers to wear it, sure i'll take it.

Geldis: By the way, tonight is one of "those" nights, interested.

*background* Aphia: Steel might be really good.
Emily: Sorry, had a bit on my mind lately.

Emily: Maybe another time though.
Geldis: Shame but i understand.

*background* Geldis: Maybe next time huh?
*background* Emily: Sure.

Emily: Come on lets go get some dinner?
Sofia: Okay...wait why are we leaving the Inn to get Dinner.
Emily: Getting some fresh meat.

(4 Hours later)

*laughing*

Emily: So what happened then?
Sofia: So this idiot then goes to try to fuck the skeever.

Sofia: and the skeever bites him in the dick.
Emily: Oh gods that's so horrible.

Sofia: Yep, he's never fucking anyone again after that, not unless they want Rockjoint.
Emily: Yeah, never been in a relationship with someone crazy enough to try to face fuck a skeever.

Sofia: Yeah...speaking of relationships.

Sofia: I got a question about Satsuki.
*Sound of cup being put down*
Emily: Hmm?

Sofia: You're in love with her huh?

Emily: H-Huh!? I don't.

Sofia: You've been talking about her non-stop since i asked about her. You've also been stopping yourself from screwing everyone too it seems....or trying too. So i'm pretty sure you love her.
Emily: I-I....

Emily: I don't know.

Emily: Since i stopped training with her i've been occasionally sleeping with people but on occasions, particularly with women when i go to sleep with them i suddenly see Satsuki.

Emily: I haven't been in a relationship for 4 years so i don't really remember if this is seriously love or a crush.
Sofia: Hmmm.

Sofia: Maybe, it might be because you never seriously thought about her being a potential serious lover until recently.
Emily: That might be true.

Sofia: Out of curiosity, what do you like about her that draws you to her anyways?
Emily: Draw me to her....um

Emily: Well?

Emily: She's....kind've prudish, so sometimes she gets angry or embarrassed on how i do things but its kind've cute how she reacts over them, even being called cute stuns her. But she's really adorable when she's teased.

Emily: She's loyal to the point where it's kind've annoying but very admirable, she almost died just trying to find me, though that was due to a lurker hitting her with poison.

Emily: She's a phenomenal fighter. Never seen anyone like her. I'd say she'd possibly be able to beat both Targoth and my Dad in a fight, its scary how good she is.

Emily: and even though she's still learning she's probably one of the best lovers i've had in a long time, and one of the few that can almost keep up with me.

Emily: I think that's it.
Sofia: Hmmm.

Sofia: I think it might be her loyalty.
Emily: Really, why do you say that?
Sofia: Well i'm assuming you've fucked quite a few guys and some girls right. How many guys do you feel you could trust?
Emily: Hmmm....i see your point.

Emily: Satsuki's been one of the few people i've met who after fucking me wanted to stay around me for reasons other than just fucking. I mean i've meet quite a few guys who'd probably only want a fuck buddy and a few girls.
Sofia: Right, and you told me you fought with her over whether or not you could sleep with other people if you decided to date. Now that you are finally interested in her, subconsciously don't want to betray her even though you aren't together.

Emily: You're right. Wow i didn't think i was that into her....i guess i really am in love.
Sofia: Yeah. Also i kept hearing you masturbate in your room last night and you've been eying people's crotches all day so i suggest you at least fuck some people to get it out of your system otherwise you'll be just trying to fuck the shit out of her instead of talking to her properly.
Emily: Right, i haven't fucked in....2 days, i'm getting ansy.
Sofia: Two's not a lot.

Emily: For me it is considering i normally fuck quite a bit before i'm satisfied.
Sofia: Right......Say, maybe when you go to tell Satsuki what you think of her, you could let me watch.

Emily: Yeeeah no, that's not happening.
Sofia: Aw.

Sofia: Was worth a shot.
Emily: Nice try though.

Sofia: *groaning* Mmmmmm

Sofia: Man i'm tried.
Emily: Me too, lets just go to sleep.

Emily: Thanks for the talk.
Sofia: No problem.....actually could you answer a question for me. It's a rather personal one.
Emily: Alright.

Sophia: This got me curious after that guard story you told me last time we met. I recall you fucked at least 20 guys during the week i worked for you, and from what you said you fuck quite a few people just to satisfy yourself....how many people have you actually slept with.

Emily: Well that's easy i.....um.....hmmm

Emily: twenty-eight times four equals one hundred and twelve, times twelve equals.....

Emily: I got it!

Sofia: THREE THOUSAND AND FIVE HUNDRED!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!
Guar: *Curious Growl*

*Background* Sofia: THAT'S INSANE!!!
Geldis: Ah, must have told her how many men she's slept with.
Guar *growls in agreement*

I'm aware this is like.....5 months too late but i had other story's that had way more priority than this one at the time. So yeah here's some glorious shitty armor by Nisetanaka. Thank you Nisetanaka for making these and thank you Kofman77 for converting them.

Also on the amount of people Emily fucked, i did the math from when she was 18 to 21, so lets say she fucked 4 people a day, 7 days a week, that's 28 people. Then by four weeks which is about a month sometimes less, thats 112 people. Then 112 people per month in a year is 1344 people. So multiply that by 3 gets you 4032. She fucks a lot but not 100% consistently, so it'd be close to that at least which is simply why i went with 3500, also her favorite type of sex is three ways due to DP's so yeah she fucks multiple people a lot.