"Remember kids, if a robber sneaks into your house grab your 4gauge shotgun, shove it up his ass, and explode that bitch."
*Orb vibrating violently*
*Sound of lightning*
*Lightning hitting ground*
*Lighting hitting ground*
*Sounds of arrows and lightning hitting armor*
*Sounds of bow and arrows firing*
Warrior: Keep shooting
*Giant roaring as arrows penetrate Armor*
*Sounds of lighting and arrows firing*
Mage: Don’t let up!!
Whiterun guard: Keep it up!
Farkas: Damn, these guys don’t die easily.
Aela: But the strategy is working pretty well.
Kodlak: Don’t just stand there you three, keep going.
Kodlak: We’ve got a long night ahead of us.
*Giant and Warriors screaming as Lighting and arrows hitting armor echo’s*
*Lightning hitting ground*
*Warriors and giant roaring*
Warrior 1: GAH!!!
Warrior 2: RAAH!!!
Fiona: You wanna take me on after I just murdered your friends?
Fiona: Fine, your funeral.
*Giant roaring as Fiona fires spell*
*Giant falling onto knees*
*Armor clanking as it falls*
Fiona: Hmph, sad.
Fiona: You’d think they’d send stronger warriors, oh well.
Fiona: Oh well, that’s fine.
*Sound of windmill turning*
Fiona: Hopefully Titus is okay.
*Sound of Windmill turning*
*Armor clanking in background*
*Sound of people screaming in background*
Joric: Get away!!!
Joric: Someone Help!
Joric: No don’t!
Joric: Save me!!!
*Background* ???: Wuld!
???: NAH KEST!!!
*Sound of metal being split*
Warrior 1: GAHH!!!
Warrior 2: RAAH!!!
Warrior 2: HAAA!!!
*Sound of warrior collapsing*
Titus: You okay little one!
Joric: Ah! Vampire.
Titus: Not a vampire, what kind of Vampire would save you, I’m-
Joric: Then who are you.
Titus: Hold on a sec *Inhale* Fus
Titus: *Exhale* RO DAH!!!
Titus: That’s what you get for trying to sneak up on me you loud piece of shit!
*Giants neck cracking as it hits ground*
Joric: You’re a vampire now?
Titus: No, look I’ll explain later.
*Other warriors and giants turning*
Titus: Oh fuck, they see us.
Titus: There's a fuckton of them too.
Titus: Well this should be interesting.
Titus: Joric, get into the Inn, tell everyone to stay inside.
Titus: See if you can get someone tell the remaining guards to do the same.
Joric: What, then that leaves you all alone, you’ll get killed.
Titus: Nah, I’ll be fine.
*takes a step*
Titus: It’s been while since I could fuck a whole army up.
Titus: Come on you Fuckers!!!
*Warriors yelling, Armor clanking*
Titus: LETS GO!!!
Satsuki: I don’t think this is it.
Emily: Oh come on, I’m sure it has to be it
Satsuki: I swear he said we’d have to go down into the main Chamber, this place doesn’t feel like it’d have lava in it.
Emily: Well it is the only castle in the area that we’ve found.
Emily: “Took us awhile just to get past that gate.”
Emily: “It’d help that all those armored skeletons were around.”
Satsuki: “Yes, that was pretty bad, but.”
Satsuki: “the ones in the courtyard were worse, hate fighting wizards.”
Emily: “you say that but “
Emily: “you killed them faster than they could shoot their spells.”
Satsuki: “T-That was a special case.”
Emily: “Those skeletons kept coming and coming too.”
Satsuki: “It felt like there weren’t a whole lot of them as there should have been.”
Emily: “probably because A you mowed them down faster than they could show up and B Titus probably killed half of them.”
Satsuki: “That’s…..probably true.”
Emily: “We also wasted time trying to open that gate when we could have teleported through it.”
Satsuki: “I prefer doing things the right way sometimes.”
Emily: “time is of the essence though.”
Satsuki: “Still, even after we teleported we ran into that other issue.”
Satsuki: Hmmm, which way do we go?
Emily: Not sure.
Satsuki: Let me see the map.
Emily: Sure, here you
*arrow whistling and paper scrunching*
*arrow whistling and paper flapping*
*Arrow hitting wall*
*Arrow falling, waves crashing*
*Sound of running*
Satsuki: “We did overkill on that Skeleton.”
Emily: “Nah, it was underkill, I would have kept going till he was dust”
Emily: “We did pick that middle route”
Satsuki: “I felt that we were supposed to be going more north rather than east.”
Emily: “I felt the same, but we did find this castle, so this should work out.”
Satsuki: In the case that it doesn’t, we need to make sure we can go in and out, so be prepared for anything okay.
Emily: Of course.
Emily: But I’m pretty sure we aren’t gonna run into anything really odd here.
(5 minutes later)
Emily: Damn skeletons, clear here.
Satsuki: Here too.
Emily: Hmm, you might be right Satsuki, I’m not seeing any of those warrior guys.
Satsuki: Still wouldn’t hurt to at least check at this point, might find something useful.
Emily: wonder what this world was before though, so many undead, its amazing.
Satsuki: He did say it was a dying world.
Satsuki: Question is, what killed these guys and brought them back.
Emily: Maybe it was that king Titus said h-
*Both readying their weapons*
Emily: What was that?
Satsuki: Relax, probably just another skel-
*Loud clanking of armor*
Emily: That sounds too big to be a Skeleton.
Emily: What the fuck is that?
*Creature clanking loudly as it charges*
*Axe hitting ground*
*blade piercing metal*
Emily: down you go!
*Blade piercing metal*
*Creature slamming Axe down*
Satsuki: What in Oblivion! It didn’t react!
Satsuki: Fine take this!
*Creature roaring as it swings*
Emily: What’s going on?
Emily: its not reacting to our attacks, wh-
*Armor clanking as it swings again*
*Axe hitting ground*
Satsuki: Dammit, no matter what I do, it doesn’t fall.
Satsuki: I need a new tacti-
Emily: Satsuki, back up!
Emily: Hey scrap heap, over here!
*Creature roaring as it slashes*
Emily: You missed!
Satsuki: Emily, what are you doing!
Emily: Just stay back.
Emily: I think I’ve got its weakness.
*Creature raising arms*
Emily: Just stay back, its gonna get hot.
Emily: Got you!
Emily rushing Creature
*Creature lowering arms*
*Emily shoving arms into armor*
*Armor falling on ground sizzling*
Satsuki: Well, that went well.
Satsuki: How did you figure out how to kill it.
Emily: When it made large moves its armor has a large gap that allowed me to see that it was hollow on the inside, I just waited until it made a large movement and boom.
Satsuki: now lets g- Emily your armor!
Emily: My what?
Emily: Oh, I was wondering why it was suddenly easier to breathe now.
Satsuki: want me to fix it up.
Emily: No no, I prefer this, I was suffocating in that, the waist plate should be enough.
Satsuki: if you say so.
Emily: Now come on, lets go to that castle.
Satsuki: All right, lead the way.
Emily: Hopefully we don’t find more of those Armored monsters.
Satsuki: agreed, harder to get to the heart of those things.
(3 minutes later)
Emily: Here we are.
Emily: Lets get this guy.
Satsuki: Right behind you.
Jesus fuck that Whiterun scene was a goddamn nightmare, you don't understand, the FPS drop and pain, so much pain, SO MUCH PAIN!!!! AND THERE ARE 4 OTHER PARTS I DID TO THAT SHIT, WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF, FUCK!!!