Good story Jay. Like the colors. At the moment I thought this guy wears sunglasses and I laughed hard.

By the way, you smartly added the numbers on dialogue bubbles so we may know from which direction invisible person speaks and in which order.

Interesting chapter.

So many revelations and events of your dragonborn.

I thought Maylin is the actual dragonborn tho. ?

Always a good time when Uncle...errr... Father Sheogorath is involved!  More stories need to feature this guy, he's a hoot!

Good Job!  

3 hours ago, Elf Prince said:

Good story Jay. Like the colors. At the moment I thought this guy wears sunglasses and I laughed hard.

 

By the way, you smartly added the numbers on dialogue bubbles so we may know from which direction invisible person speaks and in which order.

 

Wow I hadn't noticed his eyes were that dark.?Thank you. 

2 hours ago, Resdayn said:

Interesting chapter.

 

So many revelations and events of your dragonborn.

 

I thought Maylin is the actual dragonborn tho. ?

Oh I forgot to mention that this is another world Parallel to hers like a twin univers. 

42 minutes ago, djregs said:

Always a good time when Uncle...errr... Father Sheogorath is involved!  More stories need to feature this guy, he's a hoot!

Good Job!  

Oh he's is just getting started. He's almost the New Sheogorath but a lot less Bad and way more involved with the world than him but now his father will be in constant contact with him like in his head contact. Remember he said he can hear voices now.   

wow what a cool Story to make , never thought that way and lovely Pictures , thank you  ?

Oooh, this looks very interesting! 

If I understood correctly, this story is a continuation from your " Descend into Madness" chapter?

Sheogorath as a dad is 50% cute, 50% terrifying and 100% extremely entertaining. ?

I like how your Dragonborn has similar features to his godly father (as well as the suit). 

The gifs were great and at times hilarious ( fus-ro-dahing the table never gets old ?). You're also getting a hang of the speech-bubble thing, so great job on that!

The integration of Skyrim's quest into your story is well-written with plenty of humor and MADNESS to go around!

Really looking forward to more. ?

Wow, that was a very fast moving story. I'd personally preferred to have a bit more time/dialogue per scene and character, but lots of people seem to like it, so you did something right .

Glad you decided to doing stories regularly now, I'm looking forward for more  

7 hours ago, wilson99 said:

wow what a cool Story to make , never thought that way and lovely Pictures , thank you  ?

Thank you  Every time I see your screen name I think about Tom Hanks performance in this movie. 

 Great movie really sad too. 

6 hours ago, Devianna said:

Oooh, this looks very interesting! 

If I understood correctly, this story is a continuation from your " Descend into Madness" chapter?

Sheogorath as a dad is 50% cute, 50% terrifying and 100% extremely entertaining. ?

I like how your Dragonborn has similar features to his godly father (as well as the suit). 

The gifs were great and at times hilarious ( fus-ro-dahing the table never gets old ?). You're also getting a hang of the speech-bubble thing, so great job on that!

The integration of Skyrim's quest into your story is well-written with plenty of humor and MADNESS to go around!

Really looking forward to more. ?

 

Yes it's a continuation.  Believe it or not I tried to make another character look like me in RL but it turned out that Sheogorath's Son ended up looking more like me so I kinda left him nameless but his name was said in this story if you caught that.  The Gifs did give me trouble resizing so that was a pain right there I had to endure. Sheogorath can be a scary Daedric God to deal with but then I saw these videos further explaining why he does the things he does. 

5 hours ago, Alter Native said:

Wow, that was a very fast moving story. I'd personally preferred to have a bit more time/dialogue per scene and character, but lots of people seem to like it, so you did something right .

Glad you decided to doing stories regularly now, I'm looking forward for more  

Thank You  Hmm.. and here I thought I put too much dialogue and I get the opposite reaction than expected.  Considering the story I had before this one giving a bit of more information for this character.... 

Well the pace is in fact quite irregular, there can indeed be long dialogues, and then very quick successions of events in a heartbeat ; but that's not necessarily bad. Like I said in your Halloween the "chaotic" feel of the whole thing is in fact welcome in those works were madness is supposed to be the main theme. The dialogues between your dragonborn and his father were in that regard particularly entertaining (specially the scream when Sheogorath started to make sexual allusions to his mother ^^). Yet it make sense in a way as your hero had the same offensive humor than his father just a couple of spoilers before.

On the technical aspect, most screens are good, but though they add something the gifs are still choppy. The numbers on the bubbles aren't that of a good idea IMO : sure they're better than spending 30' putting the bubbles back in order, but it's immersion breaking and the eye still will go first for the bubbles at the top or a the left. So placing your bubbles adequately is the way to go. Same for the text being distorted, I don't know what software you are using, but if you can separate the layers of the text and of the bubbles that shouldn't happen. Scenario-wise, I think your male hero feels refreshing and his innate powers make more sense than Maylin's ones, so I would make sense if he was the dragonborn ,the way I see it : don't go confuse readers with several different universes, you stories should be a coherent whole. 

Anyway, atypical yet entertaining entry. ?

Malicia : « Those guys are very gross. They not gonna get much spread eagle that way, no. Instead, they're gonna get this ->  , uh.  »

3 hours ago, Tirloque said:

Well the pace is in fact quite irregular, there can indeed be long dialogues, and then very quick successions of events in a heartbeat ; but that's not necessarily bad. Like I said in your Halloween the "chaotic" feel of the whole thing is in fact welcome in those works were madness is supposed to be the main theme. The dialogues between your dragonborn and his father were in that regard particularly entertaining (specially the scream when Sheogorath started to make sexual allusions to his mother ^^). Yet it make sense in a way as your hero had the same offensive humor than his father just a couple of spoilers before.

 

On the technical aspect, most screens are good, but though they add something the gifs are still choppy. The numbers on the bubbles aren't that of a good idea IMO : sure they're better than spending 30' putting the bubbles back in order, but it's immersion breaking and the eye still will go first for the bubbles at the top or a the left. So placing your bubbles adequately is the way to go. Same for the text being distorted, I don't know what software you are using, but if you can separate the layers of the text and of the bubbles that shouldn't happen. Scenario-wise, I think your male hero feels refreshing and his innate powers make more sense than Maylin's ones, so I would make sense if he was the dragonborn ,the way I see it : don't go confuse readers with several different universes, you stories should be a coherent whole. 

 

Anyway, atypical yet entertaining entry. ?

 

Malicia : « Those guys are very gross. They not gonna get much spread eagle that way, no. Instead, they're gonna get this ->  , uh.  »

 Thank you. Not to worry it will make sense soon. 

I sense serious Sheo's influence on this chapter. I didn’t understand anything, but I liked it. 

thank you for the reminder i love companions  ?

9 hours ago, Crw said:

I sense serious Sheo's influence on this chapter. I didn’t understand anything, but I liked it. 

...

2 hours ago, wilson99 said:

thank you for the reminder i love companions  ?