wip Defiler Wings 1.4.1 English translation (not machine)

[Akmed]

Yeah that'd be pretty silly if it was hair that got stuck, "He kidnapped her, after carefully removing her scalp" Gee dragon, can you be any more of a dick? ^^

 

Spoiler

plains_fear.rpy

60 Ещё никогда и никто меня так не оскорблял!!! Сейчас я покажу тебе "благородство", лгунья!

 

60 Nobody has ever insulted me so much (i assume, before(?))!!! I will show you how "noble" I am, you liar! (I know there is a better word for liar in the context of the phrase, but I can't remember it.)

 

Spoiler

86 И маркизу де Аду всё это сходит с рук? А то знаю: стоит немного побезобразничать, как герои мигом слетаются к твоему логову!

 

86 And Marquess d'Ade (de Adu) is getting away with it? Oh I know: if you get even a little naughty / playful, heroes would be all over your lair in a hearth beat!

 

Spoiler

152 Укреплённое местечко. Штурмовать такое - замучаешься.

 

152 Quite a fortified place. Invading it would be quite an ordeal. (A fortified place. An assault would be a pain. - literal translations)

 

Not sure on the context but I'd write it as: - 152 The fortress was well fortified. Rushing to take it would be quite an ordeal.

 

Hope that helps!

[monsta88]

8 hours ago, Akmed said:

Yeah that'd be pretty silly if it was hair that got stuck, "He kidnapped her, after carefully removing her scalp" Gee dragon, can you be any more of a dick? ^^

 

  Hide contents

plains_fear.rpy

60 Ещё никогда и никто меня так не оскорблял!!! Сейчас я покажу тебе "благородство", лгунья!

 

60 Nobody has ever insulted me so much (i assume, before(?))!!! I will show you how "noble" I am, you liar! (I know there is a better word for liar in the context of the phrase, but I can't remember it.)

 

  Hide contents

86 И маркизу де Аду всё это сходит с рук? А то знаю: стоит немного побезобразничать, как герои мигом слетаются к твоему логову!

 

86 And Marquess d'Ade (de Adu) is getting away with it? Oh I know: if you get even a little naughty / playful, heroes would be all over your lair in a hearth beat!

 

  Hide contents

152 Укреплённое местечко. Штурмовать такое - замучаешься.

 

152 Quite a fortified place. Invading it would be quite an ordeal. (A fortified place. An assault would be a pain. - literal translations)

 

Not sure on the context but I'd write it as: - 152 The fortress was well fortified. Rushing to take it would be quite an ordeal.

 

Hope that helps!

 

Thank you again. The line 86 is still a bit strange, maybe if you saw the context would help. If you check it, I advise to use Notepad++, so you can see the line numbers.

 

In a lot of cases sentences look ok by themselves but then they don't fit the text around them. And then I need to figure out which is the bad text. In this case then the other text will be the culprit.

 

 

[Akmed]

I've read the context and it gets easier to understand, btw thanks for leaving the file's name in the translate section!

 

86 And Marquess d'Adu is getting away with it? I know from experience: if you cause even a little ruckus, heroes would flock to your lair.

 

I think an original author was trying to be smarty when he juggled the words to create "Lord the Hell". It's pretty silly but names don't usually get translated and from what I recall of all these 'Marquesses' is that - even in russian the "de" is usually written as "d'*name". Like "d'Artagnan".

[monsta88]

2 hours ago, Akmed said:

I've read the context and it gets easier to understand, btw thanks for leaving the file's name in the translate section!

 

86 And Marquess d'Adu is getting away with it? I know from experience: if you cause even a little ruckus, heroes would flock to your lair.

 

I think an original author was trying to be smarty when he juggled the words to create "Lord the Hell". It's pretty silly but names don't usually get translated and from what I recall of all these 'Marquesses' is that - even in russian the "de" is usually written as "d'*name". Like "d'Artagnan".

 

Yeah, I guess so, the machine translation was all over the place with his name, he had like 3 different ones, took a while until I realized it is the same person. So I simply changed it everywhere to Marquis de Hell. I might change it to something cooler later.

 

[Akmed]

Spoiler

 

plains_fear.rpy

 

754 %s (dragon name) встал на сторону доброй ведьмы. %s (girl name) перезала гороло своей сестры, быстро и милосердно.

 

 

754 Dragon took the side of a good witch. The girl slashed at the throat of her sister, mercifully quickly. (перерезал(а) - a word for 'cutting / slashing' in a male or ()female figure of speech)

 

At first I thought the 'good witch' was used in a sarcastic way but after reading the context I see that there IS actually a good witch. Wow, so much for 'goodness' in the next sentence.

Despite being moderately busy myself, I couldn't wait for the next update in your work. Hope you are doing alright!

[monsta88]

9 hours ago, Akmed said:

  Hide contents

 

plains_fear.rpy

 

754 %s (dragon name) встал на сторону доброй ведьмы. %s (girl name) перезала гороло своей сестры, быстро и милосердно.

 

 

754 Dragon took the side of a good witch. The girl slashed at the throat of her sister, mercifully quickly. (перерезал(а) - a word for 'cutting / slashing' in a male or ()female figure of speech)

 

At first I thought the 'good witch' was used in a sarcastic way but after reading the context I see that there IS actually a good witch. Wow, so much for 'goodness' in the next sentence.

Despite being moderately busy myself, I couldn't wait for the next update in your work. Hope you are doing alright!

Thanks again Akmed. The translation wasn't really helpful this time, because you wrote it in past tense too, like my original version. The problem is that after this line, there are a few more lines where the same killing happens. So basically it happens twice.

 

 

I will leave it like this and will see it in game if possible. Since I can't read python code, it might be a different case (although this time I doubt it, I don't see conditions(branches) between the texts). Edit: It happens elsewhere too, so it seems it is normal.

 

As for the "good witch", these 800+ lines are part of a small story inside the game. It has a lot of forks in the story and so multiple endings. The good witch here I think is more like a reference to one of the witches to differentiate them, becasue of her goals.

[Akmed]

True, that's just how the text flows. If you could link me a whole part in russian that could help.

 

EDIT: So I checked for myself. Seems like it's two different paragraphs that use similar descriptions. I haven't went deeper into the game yet but if it branches out a lot, I'd guess that it's just text without a good witch?

 

And the text should go as "The girl slid her sister's throat". A little bit more and I will feel like picking up english next to learn. ^^

[monsta88]

On 5/13/2018 at 2:39 PM, Akmed said:

True, that's just how the text flows. If you could link me a whole part in russian that could help.

 

EDIT: So I checked for myself. Seems like it's two different paragraphs that use similar descriptions. I haven't went deeper into the game yet but if it branches out a lot, I'd guess that it's just text without a good witch?

 

And the text should go as "The girl slid her sister's throat". A little bit more and I will feel like picking up english next to learn. ^^

That's a much better translation, I modified my text (I used "slit" for past tense).

 

I added only 2 lines fro translation, but in fact I'm not entirely sure about my text from 1072 to 1128. If you have some free time, please compare my version with the original Russian version and tell me if I misunderstood something. There is no rush though, I won't work in this for at least 2 days now.

 

Peace,

M

 

[Akmed]

Yeah, the perks of being 'moderately' busy. Now I get periods of time when I got so much time with which I have no idea what to do with.

 

plains_fear.rpy

 

1072 There's another one. <le girl> is still alive (неперерезанная - same as with the old one, slang used for cutting).

 

1128 - is in order

 

IF I got the right numbers then I went through 1070 to 1140. 1086 should have first sentence as "If I have to walk through the valley of deathly shadows,". 1094 is a bit oddly worded but has the right meaning. 1105 is completely wrong though.

 

Spoiler

1105 game.dragon.third 'Это же сколько добра на неё переводим!'

 

1105 - So much goods wasted on her! (a more literal one) / We've spend so much on her! / Just how much did we spend on her?

 

It all runs along these lines.

 

1114 Hmpf, yeah way ahead. (In russian it sounds a bit more sarcastic.)

 

Everything else seems to be in order and except for a few missing To and 'M I haven't found much missing in either context or wording. But then again, you know me by now!

[monsta88]

2 hours ago, Akmed said:

Yeah, the perks of being 'moderately' busy. Now I get periods of time when I got so much time with which I have no idea what to do with.

 

plains_fear.rpy

 

1072 There's another one. <le girl> is still alive (неперерезанная - same as with the old one, slang used for cutting).

 

1128 - is in order

 

IF I got the right numbers then I went through 1070 to 1140. 1086 should have first sentence as "If I have to walk through the valley of deathly shadows,". 1094 is a bit oddly worded but has the right meaning. 1105 is completely wrong though.

 

  Hide contents

1105 game.dragon.third 'Это же сколько добра на неё переводим!'

 

1105 - So much goods wasted on her! (a more literal one) / We've spend so much on her! / Just how much did we spend on her?

 

It all runs along these lines.

 

1114 Hmpf, yeah way ahead. (In russian it sounds a bit more sarcastic.)

 

Everything else seems to be in order and except for a few missing To and 'M I haven't found much missing in either context or wording. But then again, you know me by now!

 

1086 is actually from the bible, so that is a copypaste from there. I think this game has a lot of references to other media, it is just really hard to recognize them through the machine translated lines.

 

1105 yeah, the machine translations did not help with that one at all, thanks.

 

1114 is I guess the 1113 "dark_sister 'Hmpf, way ahead.'"

 

I added your lines, and as always, thank you very much!

 

 

[Akmed]

Just realized that 1113 can be also said as "Yeah, ahead in the wrong direction." The meaning! I've missed it.

 

Anyway, it's actually fun doing this stuff. : )

[Akmed]

Spoiler

 

plains_fear.rpy
1099 Сделано. Поверни пятый ворот на три деления.
1105 Это же сколько добра на неё переводим!

 

 

 

1099 Done. Now turn fifth valve by three segments.

 

1105 Just how much resources did we wasted on her!

[monsta88]

23 hours ago, Akmed said:

Just realized that 1113 can be also said as "Yeah, ahead in the wrong direction." The meaning! I've missed it.

 

Anyway, it's actually fun doing this stuff. : )

 

Lol, which one is it then?

[Akmed]

1113 is supposed to be a sarcastic remark to the witch's failed experiment. So write whichever you think suits it. I'd go along with the one I wrote above as it seems to fit the narration better. ^^

[Akmed]

Spoiler

plains_fear.rpy
1325 Без сил упав на землю, они с замиранием сердца следили за происходящим.

 

1325 With strength leaving, they fell to the ground and with stilling hearts watched over unfolding events. (замирание is a tricky word to find alternative in english for. The closest would be "To still" / "freezing".)

 

Or:

 

1325 With no strength left they fell to the ground and with great trepidation watched at what was happening.

 

I am a bit on the fence about either of the lines. Not sure what would fit it ideally but I think the first one reflects the context better except for the 'watched over unfolding events'. Machine translations saying 'and watched' read better.

[LightSpectr]

plains_fear.rpy
1325 Без сил упав на землю, они с замиранием сердца следили за происходящим.

 

1325 Exhausted, they fell to the ground and with a sinking heart they watched what was happening (definitely need a context here )

[monsta88]

14 hours ago, LightSpectr said:

plains_fear.rpy
1325 Без сил упав на землю, они с замиранием сердца следили за происходящим.

 

1325 Exhausted, they fell to the ground and with a sinking heart they watched what was happening (definitely need a context here )

 

Thanks LightSpectr. This line was already cleared up by Akmed, but I added 4 more if you are still willing to help out.

 

On 5/17/2018 at 12:24 AM, Akmed said:

  Reveal hidden contents

plains_fear.rpy
1325 Без сил упав на землю, они с замиранием сердца следили за происходящим.

 

1325 With strength leaving, they fell to the ground and with stilling hearts watched over unfolding events. (замирание is a tricky word to find alternative in english for. The closest would be "To still" / "freezing".)

 

Or:

 

1325 With no strength left they fell to the ground and with great trepidation watched at what was happening.

 

I am a bit on the fence about either of the lines. Not sure what would fit it ideally but I think the first one reflects the context better except for the 'watched over unfolding events'. Machine translations saying 'and watched' read better.

 

Thanks, I modified my version, it is in the current version now.

 

 

[Akmed]

plains_fear.rpy
 

Spoiler

1513 Пусть катится на все четыре стороны!

 

1513 He can go to hell for all I care! (for all I care - can be removed depending on the context, might as well leave it as - He can go to hell!)
 

Spoiler

1536 Великое исцеление Эгеледи!

1536 - By Egeledy be cured! / A high cure from Egeledy! ('Эгеледи' I assume that is a name of a goddess. It doesn't appear anywhere else so eh)

 

Spoiler

1544 Однако история должна  была закончится трагически: болезнь ведьмы никуда не делась, и %s попросила ящера убить её. Однако %s почему-то (наверное, по велению левой передней пятки) решил сделать доброе дело и излечил женщину с помощью магии. (the left front heel part is confusing)

 

1544 - But the story should have ended in tragedy: the witch's illness has not disappeared and %s asked reptile to kill her. Contrary to the request (perhaps, by the will of a front left foot's heel) he decided to do a good deed and restore the woman's body with spell's help. 

 

The part in () is a joke, the dragon decided to do something good for a change and it's described in context as something miraculous.
 

Spoiler

1583 [game.dragon.name] понимает, что ему надо разорвать наглячку на части... и чувствует, что ему совершенно не хочется этого делать. (the nagljacku part is not clear)

 

1583 - [le dragon] understood that he should tear the insolent girl to pieces... but at the same time, he didn't feel like doing it. ('наглячка' is a word for 'insolence' in female form of speech.)

 

 

I realize that LightSpectr might be better at this than I am, I don't know english all that well and tend to stick with more literal translations than what would work better for english version of context.

 

LightSpectr if you got time, go over the thread and check all my texts, pretty please?!

 

[LightSpectr]

plains_fear.rpy
1513 Пусть катится на все четыре стороны!

straight translation: "Let her go to all four corners of the earth."

Basically mean: "I don't care where she will go anymore"

 

 

1536 Великое исцеление Эгеледи!

1536The Great Healing of Egelady! (Egelady - name, maybe it isn't right spelling )

 

 

1544 Однако история должна  была закончится трагически: болезнь ведьмы никуда не делась, и %s попросила ящера убить её. Однако %s почему-то (наверное, по велению левой передней пятки)  решил сделать доброе дело и излечил женщину с помощью магии. 

1544 However the story has to end tragically: the witch's illness has not disappeared and %s asked the lizard ( COMMENT: reference to the dragon, maybe better change to "the dragon") to kill her. But %s for some reason (maybe, because of the wish of left front heel (COMMENT: "wish of left heel" means to do something without reason, the closest English variant: "just for lulz")) decideed  to do the right thing (VARIANT: to do a good deed) and cured the woman with magic.

 

 

1583 [game.dragon.name] понимает, что ему надо разорвать наглячку на части... и чувствует, что ему совершенно не хочется этого делать. 

1583 [game.dragon.name] understands, that he must tear apart this impudent woman... but he feels that he doesn't want to do it at all. (COMMENT: need a reference to scene for better translation, maybe it can be improved)

[LightSpectr]

 

20 minutes ago, Akmed said:

 

1513 He can go to hell for all I care! 

 

I played that game yesterday, so I am sure it's must be reference to "she". But yeah variant "She can go to hell, I don't care" looks good

26 minutes ago, Akmed said:

 

and restore the woman's body with spell's help. 

 

It's clear that it's not wound but illness, so she must be "cured"

 

29 minutes ago, Akmed said:

 

1583 - [le dragon] understood that he should

 

Here must be present tense  

 

Mostly your variants have the rights to live . 

[LightSpectr]

On 15.05.2018 at 4:43 PM, Akmed said:

  Hide contents

1105 Это же сколько добра на неё переводим!

 

 

 

 

1105 Just how much resources did we wasted on her!

Again trouble with tense.

 

1105 Just how much resources we are wasting on her !

 

 

[monsta88]

 

2 hours ago, Akmed said:

plains_fear.rpy

 

 

2 hours ago, LightSpectr said:

plains_fear.rpy
 

Spoiler

 

1513 Пусть катится на все четыре стороны!

straight translation: "Let her go to all four corners of the earth."

Basically mean: "I don't care where she will go anymore"

 

 

1536 Великое исцеление Эгеледи!

1536The Great Healing of Egelady! (Egelady - name, maybe it isn't right spelling )

 

 

1544 Однако история должна  была закончится трагически: болезнь ведьмы никуда не делась, и %s попросила ящера убить её. Однако %s почему-то (наверное, по велению левой передней пятки)  решил сделать доброе дело и излечил женщину с помощью магии. 

1544 However the story has to end tragically: the witch's illness has not disappeared and %s asked the lizard ( COMMENT: reference to the dragon, maybe better change to "the dragon") to kill her. But %s for some reason (maybe, because of the wish of left front heel (COMMENT: "wish of left heel" means to do something without reason, the closest English variant: "just for lulz")) decideed  to do the right thing (VARIANT: to do a good deed) and cured the woman with magic.

 

 

1583 [game.dragon.name] понимает, что ему надо разорвать наглячку на части... и чувствует, что ему совершенно не хочется этого делать. 

1583 [game.dragon.name] understands, that he must tear apart this impudent woman... but he feels that he doesn't want to do it at all. (COMMENT: need a reference to scene for better translation, maybe it can be improved)

 

 

 

Thank you guys, you both rule! IMHO it is good if both of you see it. I used lines from both of you according to which one I felt better in the given context.

 

For the 1544 I wrote this: "However, the story had to end in tragedy: with an incurable disease. %s asked the lizard to kill her. However %s somehow decided (probably just for the heck of it) to do the right thing and healed the woman with his magic."  I forgot to add it here, but %s is a variable for a name and it gets defined at the end of the code line. It is similar like game.dragon.name. I'll try to remember to add it in the future, it will help.

 

I use past tense everywhere, where the story happens in 3rd person, just like in a book. For reference, you can just open the file with a text editor. If you use Notepad++, then you can use the line numbers too, to find it quickly. It is python code, but more or less readabe. I can also upload the original Russian version if you prefer that way.

 

 

 

[Akmed]

20 hours ago, LightSpectr said:

plains_fear.rpy
1325 Без сил упав на землю, они с замиранием сердца следили за происходящим.

 

1325 Exhausted, they fell to the ground and with a sinking heart they watched what was happening (definitely need a context here )

 

Watched a movie today when I heard that phrase 'holding breath', and it kinda made me think that it would fit better in context of:

 

1325 Exhausted, they fell to the ground and with baited breaths watched what was happening.

 

What do you think?

 

And btw thanks for the help. : )

[Akmed]

Spoiler

 

mordor.rpy
719 Силами, что пребывают, кровью своей и наследием, как последняя выжившая из рода - проклинаю тебя, [game.dragon.fullname]! (I think i know this one, just want to be sure)

 

 

719 With Forces, that be, with my blood and heritage, as the last of my kin - I damn you, [game.dragon.fullname]!

 

Seems like a good start of the relationship! ; D
 

Spoiler

 

720 Чтоб было уничтожено всё, что тебе дорого, чтоб ни дна тебе, ни покрышки, чтоб ты надругался над собственной матерью и убил её... (the middle section makes no sense)

 

 

 

Yeah I can see why you feel stumped, I am not sure if they used tire covers back in middle ages either. xD

 

720 For everything you care about, to be gone! For you to violate your own mother and kill her...

 

or more literal:

 

720 For everything to be destroyed, everything you care for, so there would be no bottom to fall to, no little things to take with you, for you to violate your own mother and kill her... (translated tire covers into 'little things')

[monsta88]

On 5/21/2018 at 12:25 PM, Akmed said:

720 For everything to be destroyed, everything you care for, so there would be no bottom to fall to, no little things to take with you, for you to violate your own mother and kill her... (translated tire covers into 'little things')

Lol, none of the translators could pick up the tire covers and I'm using 3.

 

Thanks.