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"I never drink water because fish fuck in it," W.C. Fields (possibly apocryphal, but still a good quote).

Posted

Asking people about their opinions is a very good way of making friends. Telling them about your own opinions will usually have the opposite effect. --- Anonymous

Posted

"I can see you've led a life of drink and debauchery."

"You're wrong. I have not led a life of drink and debauchery."

"You mean you didn't even enjoy getting to look like that?"

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