why do some people find it harder to make friends

[mclericp]

And also, why do some people seem to have fewer friends?

[Thulas]

Not really a big question. Introversion and personal value of friendship are the answers.

Being introverted is against the common believe in fact a part of the personality and not the result of a deformed social ability. Though normaly extroverted persons have less problems with getting new friends and also have more because of it, the introverted normally set a higher value in friendshit, which makes it harder to actually become friends from the beginning, but the friendships tend to be deeper than those of an extroverted.

[Nonsense667]

 friendshit

 

The very first thread I read today made me laugh so much I started coughing. It's gonna be a good day.

[Guest airdance]

 

 friendshit

 

The very first thread I read today made me laugh so much I started coughing. It's gonna be a good day.

 

 

So you take great joy in the minor mistakes of others,  What do you do for leisure, pull the wings off flies or torture kittens.

 

Be nice and understand that not all people spell as well as you.

[Thulas]

 

 friendshit

 

The very first thread I read today made me laugh so much I started coughing. It's gonna be a good day.

 

 

Well, Freudian slip, I quess. But most friendships are really shit, aren't they?

I marked the mispelled word in the post; now it looks pretended.

 

[nonusnomeni]

@airdance

i don't think thulas was made grammar mistake, and nonesense was see meaning correctly  because we also call some weird and degenerate relations friendshit

 

and for the friendship

it is much better to have only one true friend then 10000 "friends" only in word but not in act

today peoples to easy call somebody friend, you know him/her less then a month and you call that friendship

personally i need at lest a year to make relevant and objective evaluate of someone an 2-3y to call him friend

because friendship come with some responsibility...

a true friend it is not easy to find...

 

edit as i was think thulas was know...

[Nonsense667]

 

 

 friendshit

 

The very first thread I read today made me laugh so much I started coughing. It's gonna be a good day.

 

 

So you take great joy in the minor mistakes of others,  What do you do for leisure, pull the wings off flies or torture kittens.

 

Be nice and understand that not all people spell as well as you.

 

 

Whoa whoa whoa. What? No. >.< Just no. I greatly, greatly apologize if that's the way it came off. I thought it was funny. That's all. Not because "Hah! he made a mistake! He is so inferior!" But because, you know, "friendshit." Thulas's post was actually a good one, and I thought that a good point was made, and then I saw that instead of "friendship," "friendshit" was put instead. Maybe criticize me for laughing at something juvenile like that, but I meant no bile or hate because of it. Sorry, again. 

 

Sometimes people misspell things. Sometimes those misspellings are funny. That's all. I think it's something most of us have done. I know I've had my fair share. 

[Astaroth-Lite]

Friendshit is an awesome typo; I'd almost be inclined to think it was intentional.

 

I mean, if you're going to go do stuff with people, I'd assume you are going out to do friendshit.

 

Sometimes friendshit gets in the way of things, but you gotta stick by your chums.

 

It's all good.

[Guest airdance]

Sorry I cause such a furor here, Thulas is my friend, and I thought he was being attacked.

I guess I over reacted.  I am a girl, I am allowed to over react once in a while.

[Astaroth-Lite]

You are a human, I think that takes precedence in the matter. But enough of that nonsense, let us move on.

[nonusnomeni]

Sorry I cause such a furor here, Thulas is my friend, and I thought he was being attacked.

I guess I over reacted.  I am a girl, I am allowed to over react once in a while.

 

that is a frendship

and not friendshit

overreacting in maters of friendship is understandable and acceptable

and also that is reason why some peoples have problem to make friends, they are not eager to stand for them 

[AgentChicken]

I'm one of those people who have a hard time to make friends, being an introvert i usually keep to myself and around Big groups of strangers i am really quiet.

I usually am afraid of what people will think of me when i talk to them, and how they will react to my personality. Around strangers i am very quiet and usually sit quiet and do my own thing, but with friends that i have known for a long time i will talk peoples ears off.

 

For example i start TAFE (college for you Americans) and i don't know ANYBODY there, so i will probably be quiet for a week or so until i get used to strangers being around me in class and new surroundings. When i get used to it, i can be very social.

[Emily]

In the real world, You'll soon realize that your enemies are used to be your friends.

In case of being schizophrenia, you cannot maintain healthy relationship.. for a long time.

Even if two people have something in common, they actually different in whole lot of things.

 

Extrovert can't find compassion on introverts.

 

Either way friendship is always profitable relationship, Since most people don't hang out with idiots and losers, unworthy of their time.

[StayFrosty]

I'm one of those people who have a hard time to make friends, being an introvert i usually keep to myself and around Big groups of strangers i am really quiet.

I usually am afraid of what people will think of me when i talk to them, and how they will react to my personality. Around strangers i am very quiet and usually sit quiet and do my own thing, but with friends that i have known for a long time i will talk peoples ears off.

 

For example i start TAFE (college for you Americans) and i don't know ANYBODY there, so i will probably be quiet for a week or so until i get used to strangers being around me in class and new surroundings. When i get used to it, i can be very social.

 

This...I am uncomfortable around people...'Socially Inept' is what I call myself. I hate meeting new people, it makes me extremely uncomfortable, I never know what to say or how to react...I am afraid they will think I am some sort of 'freak'. It'skay on the Internet because I don't have to stand face to face and if someone doesn't like what I say they will just pass my comments over and I remain none the wiser to their opinions....I'm happy with that.

 

But 'yep' with close friends, I'm a chatterbox.

 

[Ghoulz]

I avoid my own family, haven't spoken to my best friend in 10 years, and find dry cat food tasty. So I guess I'm batshit crazy.

[Stinky Rat]

Never was the type to be friends, i'm mostly an let down because the way i am, is just boring and dull. Typical thing is it's hard to meet someone new. Well i should stop typing.

[Thulas]

Never was the type to be friends, i'm mostly an let down because the way i am, is just boring and dull. Typical thing is it's hard to meet someone new. Well i should stop typing.

 

One of the most positive selfimages I saw lately; don't you think that there isn't really a good reason to stop writing? You still can pretend not to be boring and dull on the internet after all, works perfectly.

[Stinky Rat]

 

Never was the type to be friends, i'm mostly an let down because the way i am, is just boring and dull. Typical thing is it's hard to meet someone new. Well i should stop typing.

 

One of the most positive selfimages I saw lately; don't you think that there isn't really a good reason to stop writing? You still can pretend not to be boring and dull on the internet after all, works perfectly.

 

Thanks,it's the only selfimages i only like about. But i guess i could try pretending not to be boring or dull on the network. Thanks

[Thulas]

 

 

Never was the type to be friends, i'm mostly an let down because the way i am, is just boring and dull. Typical thing is it's hard to meet someone new. Well i should stop typing.

 

One of the most positive selfimages I saw lately; don't you think that there isn't really a good reason to stop writing? You still can pretend not to be boring and dull on the internet after all, works perfectly.

 

Thanks,it's the only selfimages i only like about. But i guess i could try pretending not to be boring or dull on the network. Thanks

 

 

Don't be sarcastic; do it.

You'll be surprised on how many people you can meet in the various threads you cen get along with, even if you think about yourself as dull and boring.

Keep in mind that others see you differently than yourself, which in most cases is a good thing.

[Jayce Dimmer]

It's too broad a spectrum; what you'll find are many opinions that could be grouped under particular themes.

 

For me, I can't be bothered with small talk; which just so happens to be one of the most common methods of building friendships. Don't like the weather? Big deal. Killed a guy with a headshot in CoD? Don't care. Went to a resturant and had a steak? So what?

 

I'm into deep thought-provoking discussion. Those typical topics I just typed don't interest me in the slightest. However, if someone wants to talk about, say, how much damage we're doing to the world? Alright, now we're talking. Discussing and comparing various political/economic systems? Fabulous. Weighing up the impact of being a consumer or a freegan? Shit's getting interesting.

 

Sadly, I never meet people who are willing to engage in such exchanges. When I've tried to invoke discussion such as that, I either get blown off or the mindless "Yeah? Uh huh. Oh really? I know right.".

 

Funnily enough, there are plenty of people on the net ready to discuss such things. Reality be damned.

[AKM]

"Keep in mind that others see you differently than yourself, which in most cases is a good thing." - Thulas

 

This took me a LOOOONNNGGG time to figure out.  I ended the only "promising" "relationship" I've had in five years for this reason, before I knew about it.  Didn't know why she stuck around, so I forced her away... then my sister told me this.  It's true, apparently.  Sometimes you just have to accept the fact that others see something about you that you either don't, or ignore if you are aware of it. Accept it, and allow it.  Oh, and I, too, am an introvert, don't talk to my family, etc. etc. and so on... except the cat food.  I leave that to the cats.  (They might get mad!)  Made four friends in college.  One of whom I still talk to on a "regular" basis.

 

"Funnily enough, there are plenty of people on the net ready to discuss such things. Reality be damned." - MajinCry

 

I suspect this has a lot to do with vulnerability.  They feel far less vulnerable about opening up when not in person.  You never know when some idea you have will be taken the wrong way... and many people feel, rightly or wrongly, that they have a reputation to uphold, and any change or admission of some idea in this twisted world today might very well have a negative effect on their reputation.  Take, for example, the recent cover of "Rolling Stone" magazine, with the Boston Bomber kid on the cover.  People see it, jump to conclusions, go apeshit.  What they don't do is get informed (note I didn't say "stay" informed), open the cover, read the damn thing, and realize that the article is about "What the fuck is happening in our society that makes these things possible??? ie Where'd we fail this kid and how do we prevent such thinking and actions from happening again?".  Unfortunately, it seems critical thinking and just plain old fashioned thinking for yourself and common sense have gone out the window in the real world long ago.  Who wants to open themselves up in a place like that?

[quin666]

Trust hard thing come by these days. Most people don't want open heart out everybody see.

My brother had friends, I didn't have one friend until one my brother friends told me skip school

with him. Pass all classes, what have lose by missing day? Open my heart went along with him..

Turn out group friends playing Playstation and N64 fighting games. Same people see every day

hop on bus! How long take get to location? Five minutes! Today people not friends, they family

members.

 

I was that guy playing FF8 in another room. He could have said nothing. Why pick me? I could have

said "No Thanks" went to school knowing was lie. After day was over I understand why pick me.  

 

[LaEspada]

Hmm I remember when we were talking about extroverted and introverted people in my psychology class (mind you that 3/4th of the class was extraverted according to the Myers Briggs test we took at the beginning of the fall semester) and we have to list what we like and dislike about the opposite type.

 

I was an introvert, but I'm not a quiet person I"m just more reserved than an extraverted person, and when my side brought up the topic of friendships it seemed the extraverts took that as almost a slap to the face and very heartialy denied that their "friendships" werent "as deep" compared to the deeper friendships that introverts typically have.

[kingkong]

just to blow you out      i am a sociable kind of human i go easily to people and people always come to me and the most funny is often people tell me their life (i should make them pay for psychologist ears)  i alway make new contacts but never keep them as in general people always ask me things ( and i never ask anything ).

 

i do not care about how people see me or think about me i am just trying to live according to my mind.

i alway try to find another solution to anything and have a smile.

if i feel a need of population i go out to night club or visiting a populated place or just walking around the city and park 99% of chance that someone will talk to me (best if it is a girl).

[E.L. Palmer]

What about people who have been victimized from childhood by family and 'friends'?