( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 Ok, when it comes to flirting we've all heard some bad pick up lines, perhaps some good ones, and even some improbable ones. Whether they were good, bad or genuinely "WTF?", post some memorable pick up lines you've uttered or head. I'll start: "All I can promise you is that I won't stop until the mattress is drenched, your legs are numb and the neighbors know my name."
Guest Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 comes up in bar from behind when i ordering drinks to shape on me like i never will notise, goes slowly by and postion himself next to me and stare at my boobs, thats like wtf? what about a normal hi how are u? without the squeeing shaping and the obius look without saying anything its just creepy
AgendaDysphoria Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in!"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Posted May 24, 2014 Author Posted May 24, 2014 This one a friend tried "If I was a squirrel and you were a tree, could I bust a nut in your hole?"it went over EXACTLY as well as you think
Ashkandii Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 "hey you yeaah you, are you tired of having guys come up to with bad pick up lines? yeah? thats good gurl thats reaal good i got the perfect solution for you, how about we do what you here for..." *wink wink* apparently it wasen't what i was thinking but i still got her number which is all good.
Redflyingmonkey Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 "Do you want to get out and puke together on a car outside" ? Me, to any girl I see in electro fests when the gf is not around.
Cynical Misanthrope Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 "May I entice the lady with a intercourse" - Said by a good friend of mine, after hitting on a lady for a few hours. "Hey, if you want to fuck me, go ahead, we can do it in the bathroom" - Said by a lady to me. I barely knew her, and she was drunk as fuck. I politely declined. "Hey you, have you seen a thing like this before?" - Said by me, while pulling my pants down, and tucked my cock between my legs, and tried to make it look a pussy. It did not end there, and she replied "well, have you seen a thing like this before" and pulled her pants down and showed me her pussy. "Lets go into the bedroom and see what happens shall we?" - Said by me when a I meet a girl from the Internet. Also. my best friend was also present, so we ended up having a threesome with her.
ТigегШооd Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 I'll be gentle, I promise. What can I say I'm very considerate.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Posted May 24, 2014 Author Posted May 24, 2014 "I can't wait to disappoint you sexually" ^ Don't ask me how, but it got me laid.
Cynical Misanthrope Posted May 24, 2014 Posted May 24, 2014 "I can't wait to disappoint you sexually" ^ Don't ask me how, but it got me laid. lol, good one! At least you were honest and that may have been the trigger
Molevalence Posted May 26, 2014 Posted May 26, 2014 Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a foot long. I'm not Fred Flintstone but I will definitely make your Bedrock. My name is Chance. Do I have one? Can you count? Can you count on spending the night? Beauty is only a light switch away. I never used these but I heard them over the years. Worth a few laughs at least.
Captain Cobra Posted May 26, 2014 Posted May 26, 2014 Are you an archaeologist? I've got a bone for you to inspect.
AgendaDysphoria Posted May 27, 2014 Posted May 27, 2014 Wanna give me an Australian kiss? It's like a French kiss but you're going down under.
Eternally_Dark Posted May 27, 2014 Posted May 27, 2014 One of my all time favorites is:"NIce shoes, Wanna fuck?"It's never gotten me anywhere, but I usually say it to get a laugh.
Emberheart Posted May 31, 2014 Posted May 31, 2014 "OMG you play videogames? That's so cool." It gets old fast hearing that in any conversation.
Redflyingmonkey Posted June 1, 2014 Posted June 1, 2014 "OMG you play videogames? That's so cool." It gets old fast hearing that in any conversation. Think about all the nerd dudes on this planet who'd orgasm instantly if this same line was said once in any conversation by any girl in an attempt to pick her up ! It'd go like : "I hit level 80 on my warlock yesterday, how about celebrating with me ? - OMG you play videogames? That's so cool. "
Guest Mogie56 Posted June 1, 2014 Posted June 1, 2014 Some funny, some corny and none would work LOL. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money? If I followed you home, would you keep me? Here is $30. Drink until I am really good looking, then come talk to me.I'm trying to rearrange the alphabet so that U and I are together.Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?If we had a garden, I'd put my tulips and your tulips together.Hey, I just noticed you looking at me across the room. I'll give you a minute to catch your breath!Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to walk by again?Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for Christmas.
Spectre_15 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 My friend at work told me someone said this to her at a bar: "I want to stick my penis in your face." They've been together for 6 months now. Guess it worked?
Chaos63 Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 You like magic? Wanna see me pull something out of my pants?
Queen Bee Posted June 6, 2014 Posted June 6, 2014 Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes? If we had a garden, I'd put my tulips and your tulips together. That first one makes me lol. The second one sounds like a pickup line for lesbians, ifyouknowwhatImean ^_~
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