LL changed me. What about you?

[Guest]

58 minutes ago, steelpanther24 said:

 

Thank you for sharing that, as well as to others.    I wish I knew what made LL a superior site to others, other than possibly one single rule "Don't be a dick".   

However, I wanted to ask if you have played Dragon Age Origins.    In terms of romance/relationships, I have not see its equal.   The mod maker Dahliailynn (https://www.nexusmods.com/dragonage/users/2073175 ) made a series of mods that seriously expanded the story telling and romance options.     Anyway, I do not know when you started gaming since that game came out in 2009 (not long ago to me, but...I am one of the older people here)  so you may have missed it if  you are a young gamer.

I did play the game. But its so awfully long time ago. I do not remember anything anymore from it.

Have to rebuy it because i played it on a console which i sold.

I will try it out.

 

I started gaming in the early 90s. But i am sure i missed some great games. Thanks

 

[TT.]

7 hours ago, steelpanther24 said:

Thank you for sharing that, as well as to others.    I wish I knew what made LL a superior site to others, other than possibly one single rule "Don't be a dick".  

i would say it's also the fact that it is waaaaay more open to everyone, since people can freely talk about sexual stuff too. and such open talks kinda reinforce the bonds, people are kinda just being naked to each others, metaphorically or physically for some. the more open you are to everyone and restraining them with that single rule only, the more they would open themselves to others and appreciate everyone for who they are, i think.

[Guest]

There is a point i did not mention but should be said as well.

 

I learned from my longer life, that words are as powerful as a sword.

So i have seen some discussions that went in the wrong direction.

People are people but i think sometimes people do not convey what they really mean but instead hurt others even though they do not mean it.

Though there are also cases where they do.

I found the mods reasonable in my distant view but there is of course little i know.

So even though most discussions are great and can give you the feel of a community, there are also awkward moments or sometimes not so nice comments.

I learned, through this website but not only, that i need to disengage sometimes. Because i know me. No one wants to retreat from their point of view and stand their ground.

Digital space is sometimes more fragile then the real world.

 

Even today, i have to think a lot of times before i respond to a comment just to avoid that the receive gets me and not think i am attacking. There is always a fine line and especially if emotions in it, its sometimes really hard to not be personal. I still struggle with that from time to time.

There are others that are much better than me in that regard. So this is also a plus that i took away from the site.

[steelpanther24]

11 hours ago, yester64 said:

There is a point i did not mention but should be said as well.

 

Even today, i have to think a lot of times before i respond to a comment just to avoid that the receive gets me and not think i am attacking. There is always a fine line and especially if emotions in it, its sometimes really hard to not be personal. I still struggle with that from time to time.

There are others that are much better than me in that regard. So this is also a plus that i took away from the site.

 

Cultural differences sometimes complicates matters as well.   I fall to my own biases often when I assume everyone on here was exposed to the same environment in spite of knowing that not to be the case.  @Evaloves4 has called me out a few times, though I am familiar with the history of her area, even spending a considerable amount of time in the Adriatic Sea.   

 

However,  being a safe environment, I trust that my missteps are judged against the entirety of my presence here, unlike some other SM sites that will take one crass comment out of context and make a person's entire being about that single post, regardless of their posting history.  

[Guest]

3 hours ago, steelpanther24 said:

 

... that will take one crass comment out of context and make a person's entire being about that single post, regardless of their posting history.  

> This happened to me several times.

[steelpanther24]

16 hours ago, Evaloves4 said:

> This happened to me several times.

Yes, and that was a sad turn, especially since some of  your long time friends left LL.    I hope that they will come back, when they feel comfortable and ready, if they aren't already back and just lurking.

[Guest]

4 hours ago, steelpanther24 said:

Yes, and that was a sad turn, especially since some of  your long time friends left LL.    I hope that they will come back, when they feel comfortable and ready, if they aren't already back and just lurking.

> You know, if someone likes you, he or she will always find positive and valid excuse for your (post) mistakes. Just like you said: people here knows English is not my first language and great majority understands why I make silly mistakes in wanting to say one thing that, unfortunately, was something else at the end. If I care about my virtual relationship with person who misunderstood me or I misunderstood him, I will try to clear up that misunderstanding just like I had it several times with my long time LL friends @Psalam(almost 69 ), @Tirloque , @dharvinia , @Jay-Omms and few others. All of us are from different countries, cultures and languages. No wonder, why we often had misunderstandings, but we clear them every time they happen.

 

> One more thing: I notice that LL members over 50 year old are much nicer, tolerable and cultural than many of us, younger. You guys have my respect. And I mean it.