5 in the morning, just outside Whiterun...

 

 

Ysolda: "Mai! This is crazy! Remind me again why we are awake and outside the city so early in the morning!"

 

 

Mai: "You KNOW why, Yssy. I'm gonna teach you how to hunt! If you're going to get into the merchants trade it will help to be able to get out and hunt your own supplies!"

 

 

Ysolda: "I usually prefer to let fool-hardy adventurous types do that work FOR me...."

 

 

Mai: "Well some of us fool-hardy adventurous types are getting a little sick of doing your dirty work! So quit complaining and pay attention!"

 

 

Mai: "First things first. THIS is a bow. It's not just a weapon, but also a friend out here in the wilds."

 

 

Ysolda: "Hmmm - that 'friend' of yours looks like it's seen better days. Is that really the best bow you have? I've seen adventurers in the city with beautiful Elven bows..."

 

 

Mai: "Don't under-estimate the simple wooden bow, Yssy. In the right hands, this bow can be extremely deadly!"

 

 

Mai: "Anyway - I have brought you out to one of my favourite hunting grounds. And sure enough, look! Out there, on the hill..."

 

 

Mai: "A pair of wolves! These guys will do perfect for our first lesson - plus, we'll be helping out local farmers at the same time!"

 

 

Mai: "Wolves are always picking off goats and some of the younger cows. And while they aren't a major threat to people..."

 

 

Mai: "...they do have extremely sharp jaws and can be dangerous in packs. We'll keep our distance."

 

 

Mai: "So...are you ready to get started?"

Ysolda: "I don't know. What happens if we miss?"

 

 

Mai: "Hehehe - I NEVER miss! So you'll be learning from the best!"

 

 

Mai: "Okay...it looks like they are preoccupied with each other at the moment- so it's a perfect time to strike."

 

 

Mai: "I'll go first. Watch my technique closely, and feel free to ask any questions..."

 

 

Mai: "Take a deep breath and pull back hard..."

Ysolda: "Are you sure about this? They're pretty far away."

 

 

Mai: "...I can adjust for the distance by aiming slightly above where I want the arrow the land..."

 

 

Mai: "...In this case, I'm aiming slightly above the left wolf's head..."

 

 

Mai: ".................and release!"

 

 

FWIP

 

 

Mai: "...he won't even see it coming!"

 

 

Rabbit: "......"

 

 

Wolf: "?????"

 

 

FWITTT

 

 

Ysolda: "Nice shot, hun. Is this gonna be on the test?"

Mai: "OH COME ON!!! Argggh - he moved his head at the last second!!!"

 

 

Ysolda: "So...what's going to happen to that arrow?"

 

 

Mai: "It'll just come to rest harmlessly at the other side of the hill, I guess..."

 

 

Mammoth: "FFFWURRRRRRRRR!!!"

 

 

Ysolda: "What was that noise?! It sounded like some kind of Daedra!"

 

 

Mai: "Y'know...I kinda wish it WAS a Daedra..."

Ysolda: "By the Divines - this is very bad, right?"

 

 

FWWWURRRRRRRRR!!!

Mai: "Yep..."

 

 

Smash. Smash. SMASH.

 

 

Mai: "So....um.....that concludes the lesson for this morning. Any questions?"

Ysolda: "Just one..."

 

 

Ysolda: "Why, exactly, are we friends?!"

 

The End!

Guard: "By the Divines, it must be my lucky day! Here she comes! Okay....remember: play it cool...."

 

 

Guard: "Good evening, m'lady. Um...haven't seen you around Dragonsreach in a while. Keeping safe, I hope."

 

 

Mai: "Oh......I'm so sorry! I almost walked past you without saying hello! Please pardon my lack of manners, I'm just sooooo tired!"

 

 

Guard: "Not at all, m'lady. Most people don't even look at us guards, let alone converse with us! What brings you here at this hour, if you don't mind my curiosity?"

 

 

Mai: "Oh, you know, just the usual: hoping to turn in a few bounties before heading back to the Companions for the night."

 

 

Mai: "Although I'm kinda worried that I may have screwed up my latest bounty..."

 

 

Guard: "I find it hard to believe that such a skilled archer such as yourself could screw something up. What happened, exactly?"

 

 

Mai: "Hmmm, I told myself I'd keep this a secret....but......okay, so I was supposed to kill a giant that was causing trouble for farmers just outside the city. I had snuck right up to the giant's camp, he had no idea I was there, and I pulled back on my bow knowing that I'd have one shot to bring him down..."

 

 

Mai: ".....but I kinda missed his head and instead hit one of his mammoths right on the butt! I swear, my arrows seems to be magnetically drawn to mammoth butts! Anyway, the mammoths ran away in shock, and the giant followed. So I DID get rid of him.....just not in the way I intended. I'm such a failure. If the Companions find out..."

 

 

Guard: "Ha! That's what you are worried about? Mai, that's the best possible way you could have completed that bounty! The giant is gone, you get paid, the farmers are safe, and no creature needed to die! It's perfect!"

 

 

Mai: "Hey......HEY! You're right! Wow - I feel so much better now. Thanks so much, hun!"

 

 

Guard: "My pleasure, m'lady. You know....I gotta be honest. Every time you come in here I always find myself thinking the exact same thing..."

 

 

Mai: "Oh really? What? What do you find yourself thinking?"

 

 

Guard: "I....well......that is......"

 

 

Guard: "..........."

 

 

Guard: ".............."

 

 

Guard: "........................."

 

 

Guard: "..........................................................."

 

 

Guard: "-ahem- I always find myself thinking: I wish there were more people as kind-hearted and friendly as you, Mai!"

 

 

Mai: "Awwwwwww - you great big sweetie! Thanks so much!"

 

 

Mai: "For a second there I was afraid you were gonna say something pervy! You wouldn't believe how many guys I meet who can only think about sex - just because I happen to be naked!"

 

 

Guard: "Wait, you're naked?! Wow....look at that.....I hadn't even noticed!"