So here it is, the new story ! And I like how you retained the graphical, drawing-like identity of your previous works, but while refining it with a seemingly different (clearer, IMO) compromise. Technically speaking, the english skills also look quite decent, with no major mistake noticed at first glance. The story is immersive, with a believable scenario so far, and a protagonist a lot of readers could relate to. And the length feels alright. The only thing is that by displaying your boards/pages right next to each other (as in a book) instead of below each other (as in a webtoon), you might confuse some readers about the reading order, and basically spoil them about the next page each time they scroll. I'm not sure that's the best choice for a web publication.

Anyway, nice work overall !

Malicia : « It's very nice, yes. And Linda looks very pretty, and very intelligent too.

               She should be careful though, otherwise she's gonna end up doing paid honey-honey.  »

8 minutes ago, Tirloque said:

The only thing is that by displaying your boards/pages right next to each other (as in a book) instead of below each other (as in a webtoon), you might confuse some readers about the reading order, and basically spoil them about the next page each time they scroll. I'm not sure that's the best choice for a web publication.

Is it better now ? That's my bad, for me it was display one page at a time, not two (and the story is design like that so...). Maybe depend on people. but now it should be fix.

Thank you for your feedback. I was afraid it would be hard to read because I change the font and the size of dialogue, I'm happy it is not a problem. My main focus on this one are on the characters (make more unique and "realistic" character) and on the translation. And for the visual, I just wanted to have something cleaner and to make a difference.

3 hours ago, RDA said:

Is it better now ? That's my bad, for me it was display one page at a time, not two (and the story is design like that so...). Maybe depend on people. but now it should be fix.

In fact it depends on your browser's windows size : if I went fullscreen, it fitted two boards wides, if I didn't only one.

You can make sure it'll be displayed alright by pasting only one image/page per line (which you just did) and aligning them on the center (the lines buttons on the typing box menu, right next to the Preview button).

Aside of the centering it's fixed now. ?

3 hours ago, RDA said:

Thank you for your feedback. I was afraid it would be hard to read because I change the font and the size of dialogue, I'm happy it is not a problem. My main focus on this one are on the characters (make more unique and "realistic" character) and on the translation. And for the visual, I just wanted to have something cleaner and to make a difference.

I find it clearer personally, even more with the less aggressive filtering of your visuals. You made good uses of the bubbles btw, the lettering was good and the bubbles placement took advantage of the whole board.

3 hours ago, RDA said:

Thank you for your feedback.

Malicia : « You're very welcome, yes.  »