I looked over my shoulder as Whiterun faded from view, a city that had once promised such possibilities and had been the site of my greatest triumph now represented a humiliation I could never live down. Even should my form revert the memory of this would haunt me forever. Defeated by a worm of a man, exposed and lessened to a crowd of gawking strangers, seen as nothing more than an object of lust and ridicule, I needed some time away from Whiterun even if it represented my best hope of information on Therin. I had decided to do the next best thing and made my way to Markarth, where I hoped some of the familiarity that Belgarth had indicated remained and that I might acquire some further knowledge of his whereabouts or insight into his mindset.
It was a tense journey, now seeming to be fraught with dangers. I jumped at every sound and every rustle of leaves. My usual watchfulness was replaced wipe eyed trepidation. The experience in Whiterun had humbled me in a way I had never thought possible. Whilst I still felt I could match an opponent with a weapon in hand I was no longer keen to put that to the test. <Still level 1>

Yet for all my worries the journey had passed largely without incident, I had killed a couple more wolves with the aid of Masha’s steel shod hooves and killed a bandit who made the mistake of jumping out at me on his own. The fight had proven instructive, as I had already realised I could no longer rely on overwhelming my opponents and instead opted for agility, dancing around them on light feet, making them miss and slowly wearing them down with small strikes. My dagger Dragonsting held a wicked edge and even small quick slashes had cut through the man’s hide armour into the flesh below. What I also took from this though was that multiple opponents would prove a much greater challenge than before, I would be far more difficult to wear down more than one attacker in this way. Still I felt a little better, this contest providing a little of the machismo I had sought in picking the ill thought out fist fight with Mikael.
I arrived in Markarth and hesitated between going to straight to the keep or trying the inn. In truth the inn was a better source of news, the patrons more likely to talk than the officials of the keep. Still I was torn after my recent experiences in taverns. After a moment’s more hesitation I made my way to the inn. Walking in I ordered an ale but sipped at slowly whilst taking in my surroundings.
Talking to the usual sources and drunkards I learned nothing except how to dodge the roaming hands of the inebriated. About to call it a day and rent a room I noticed two familiar figures walk in. Belgarth and Helena took a table and some food, I wrestled with the idea of approaching them and confessing all but judged it too great a risk casually I took the table near theirs an decided to listen to their conversation.
“- No Papa we can’t, he helped us!”
“It’s not use Helena.” Belgarth looked around quickly, shifty as ever. I feigned a strong interest in my drink and called upon my recent experience of insobriety to pass unnoticed. “Therin has tracked us down-“
“It’s just a letter Papa, he can’t find us, we should never have come back to Markarth”
“We still have silver here girl, silver we will need to start a new life. Maybe he knew we would come back, maybe he knows. His letter said he would leave us alone if we simply told him all we knew, there is not much we can tell him that he will not have already guessed anyway, we didn’t see him since we left Winterhold and-“
I had been to brazen in my eavesdropping, Belgarth had picked up on it, he ushered Helena to her feet and seemed about to move to another table when he looked at me again. He stared straight in my eyes and his own eyes seemed to widen in recognition. Suddenly he had taken Helena by the arm and was making for the door at speed. Could he really have recognised me when no when else had?! But then again, he knew that I would undergo changes, could he have guessed? I felt no choice but to follow him.
Getting out to the street I saw him make for the gate.
“Belgarth wait!”
Straight away, as soon as the words left my mouth I realised my mistake. My recognition would have all but confirmed his suspicions.
“So its true?! By the Gods!”
He turned to leave, as he reached out to grasp Helena instinct took over:
“Fuz!”
My Thu’un whilst not what it was caught him off balance and knocked him off his feet, drawing Dragonsting in one motion I rushed over but then catching sight of Helena just standing there I hesitated. I looked down at the man as he cowered on the ground. Taking a deep breath, I realised that I could not simply murder him.
“Belgarth I, I have been through a lot in a small space of time. I am not what I was, a price I am paying for helping you and your daughter.” The next words burned as they left my throat. “I’m begging you, please tell no one least of all Therin.”
“Dragonborn… Unn… I am sorry but… for the safety of my daughter, I must tell him all. For what you have done for us I will be honest with you. But should you try to stop me again I will call for the guards.”
Tears ran like traitors down my face, dimly I heard footsteps retreating into the distance and now knew that it was not only Belgarth that knew of my change. Rumours would spread, I just hoped that in people’s minds they remained rumours. As to Therin, I would no longer even have the element of surprise. Without another word, I turned from the pair that I had once rescued and walked back to the inn.
I sat by the fire trying to decide my next course of action. I had learned nothing from the inn but decided it might still be worth trying the keep. I ordered a room and slept till morning, from there I made my way to the keep.
Deciding against speaking to the Jarl and the usual courtiers I made my way toward the excavation site and the insane mage Calcelmo.
“Hail mage, I wondered if you knew anything about a High Elf named Therin?”
“That fake practitioner of petty parlour tricks? Yes, I know him…”
And so began a long and clearly long overdue rant on the failings and inadequacies of Therin and his magical prowess.
“…Swooping round here like he owned the place. Even those Thalmor lot kept a wary distance, not me though. He doesn’t scare me. Thinks being some high and might Thalmor lord entitles him here in Skyrim of all places! Ancient family my arse!”
In a way that explained a lot, even Thalmor agents would have to respect and cover up for ancient nobility.
“When did you see him last?”
“Not sure he seemed to come and go a lot. Last saw him in fancy new blue robes.”
“I was familiar with these and was about to leave before Calcelmo added:
“Waste of money, paying through the nose for Radiant Raiment gear. Nice normal robes are all you need, it all cloth. It’s the enchantment that counts anyway. Arrogant bastard!”
I had my clue, the Radiant Raiment, Skyrim’s premier clothing line located in Solitude. I had my course it seemed. Thanking Calcelmo I quickly made for the keep’s exit and dashed for the city gate suddenly keen to be underway.
Making my way to the stables I leapt atop Masha and kicked her into speed. It seemed that I galloped the whole way and yet could not get to my destination soon enough. I felt if only in a small way that I was making progress in my quest while at the same time was desperate to outrun any rumours that may be making their way out of Markarth.
I arrived at Solitude in the early afternoon, the Capital looked as grand as ever and I thought not for the first time how nice it would be to live here. I made my way into Radiant Raiment. This was a store I had never previously frequented, having little use for fancy clothes when I could spend my money on armour. I had heard of the aggressive nature of the proprietor though and realised I would need to seem an interested shopper to get anywhere with my questions. I had no sooner set foot in the store than a bored laconic voice pronounced:
“My, my look what the Sabrecat dragged in. My dear you look positively awful! I would ask how I can help you but I’m really not sure that I can.”
I didn’t quite know how to respond to this, as a man people where not aggressive in case they got their face smashed in but even as a woman I had faced little hostility, the looks of my new body enticing men and charming women.
“I, ah I need something appropriate for the Blue Palace.”
“AND how exactly is a wandering little vagrant like expecting to gain entry in the Blue Palace? Never mind, I will not waste my time, I assume you have money enough to buy my wares or else you can get out.”
Dumbly I held up my purse, heavy with septims.
“Very well, this way and be quick.
The afternoon passed in a blur of silk, satin and lace. Yet once where once I would have been bored by the clothes shopping and outfits now I was enthralled, finding myself eager to try on each new gown and outfit. Enjoying the feel of the fabric and seeing the effect they had flattering my already alluring figure. Even the shop keeper’s negativity was unable to dull my enthusiasm till I almost forgot what I had come in for in the first place. It was not until I was paying up, having selected 1 gown and three dresses one of which I remained wearing that I remembered why I was there.
“Oh, by the by have you by any chance had any dealings with a high elf named Therin?”
“Therin you say? Why yes, dashing elf by any measure I must say it was a pleasure to serve HIM. Sometime ago now, I believe he had business at the bard’s college.”
“Thank you.” I made my way to the door and from there quickly took my armour and new purchases to put with my other belongings in Masha’s saddle bags, leaving Dragonsting as well, not finding a way of adequately sheathing it above my new dress. A wonder of red lacey silk, sweeping down to my feet, firmly placed in high heel shoes that bizarrely I seemed to have no trouble walking in at all, I enjoyed being that but much taller even if some of my movement was compromised. I walked back to the city, blushing as I felt the fine, transparent red underwear pull further up my bum. The shopkeeper said it helped with the fit of the dress so I took her advice. I felt stronger in a different sort of way like I did the first time I donned armour. More than that I had taken a lesson from Mikael and Whiterun. Wearing armour had marked me out, presented me as someone pretending to be something. My new looks were not those of a warrior and people had resented me dressing as one, had been happy to see me put in my place. For travel and the wild I would need the armour but for the cities the dresses would a much better protection.
Entering the bard’s college, the head, an older but still handsome Altmer named Viarmo, greeted me, taking one of my hands in both his and gently placing a kiss on the back of it. In spite of myself a small giggle burst from between my lips.
“Ah but a beautiful lady straight from legend glides into our humble domain. Please be seated fair maiden, prithee explain how your unworthy subject may aid you?”
Taking a seat at a table near the entrance, Viarmo sat opposite me.
“I’m looking for a man by the name of Therin and believe he came here?”
Viarmo frowned.
“Indeed he did lady, loathsome man. Demanded copies of anything and everything we had on eternal life. He also demanded our only copy of ‘The Legend of Darlia, The Eternal Bride”
“What did he want with these texts?”
“He did not say, simply became very angry when I denied him. He told me he was of great import in the Aldmeri Dominion, I told him I had no wish to return there anyway. He then mentioned that he was the new court mage of Whiterun and so I informed him that this was solitude not Whiterun and that our patron was the future high queen herself.”
The news that he was a court wizard in Whiterun was both a revelation and a horror. He may well have been there the whole time while I made a fool of myself with Mikael. Before I left I thought I may have an opportunity to glean more information so asked about Viarmo about The Legend of Darlia, The Eternal Bride.
“It is an ancient play lady though we believe based on real events. Once long ago there was a powerful sorcerer named Prospero who sought eternal life but more than this he realised the danger of loneliness, watching all those he cared for age and die. He searched for his perfect partner, it was not enough for him to share eternal life for what if, over the passage of time she began to resent him or look another way. He sought a means to bind her to him, to make their marriage contract more than a formality. He needed a way to make her subservient to him for all eternity. He, through research learned that he needed a girl who had the means to hold more than one soul. How he discovered this is forever shrouded in mystery and indeed the testing of it is only vaguely hinted at in the play. In the end he found the woman Darlia, she was a summoner of some considerable power, perhaps even otherworldly power. Prospero found her, abducted her and took her to his castle. From there he began to seduce her for the magic would only work if she entered into the contract willingly.”
“Why would she do this? How could someone tie themselves to another for all eternity, not only that but in a lesser role? What as the nature of this subservience?”
“Hmmm, you know if you are keen to know more, the best way to become familiar with the tale is to act it out. Would you be interested? I believe you would make an excellent Darlia and I myself am a fair Prospero.”
Having found out where Therin was I wasn’t sure that I had time to waste acting out plays, what information I could get of use I probably already had. And yet it sounded kind of fun, the last few weeks had been a blur of misery and humiliation, I needed something positive.
“Ok, it sounds fun although I may be pushed for time, maybe we could just do the last scene or two?”
“No problem, follow me.”
Viarmo led me up some stairs to an area that looked almost like a chapel, we passed a couple of others on the way but thet offered me no more than a small look before going on the way. Viarmo disappeared for a minute to retrieve the text before appearing again. He handed me the text and showed me where to read from saying he had his own lines long remembered.
“Prithee Prospero what’s dost thou wish from me? To spend an eternity your slave when I could have a full life of mine own. That I might abandon those that I love and that love me to pursue this fool errand?”
Viarmo began to pace, seeming to build up momentum as he spoke. When I looked closely at him his face seemed to belong to another, gone was the charming old academic and replaced by the stern power of the sorcerer Prospero.
“Hear me Darlia, I offer thee salvation! Freedom and eternity can be thine if only thou would but agree to submit, to be mine. Tis the only way we can be together forever, mutual binding. By this gem of power I can forge us together, make us anew. Think what we may achieve? Think what we could offer the ages, the good we could do!”
“Yet you would have me the lesser, would have me lessen myself to make you the greater! What love in obedience? What tenderness in asking submission?”
“Dost thou not trust me, do you take me for a villain, a knave that would misuse you or this gift. This submission is your demonstration of devotion, nothing more. Submission, allowing me into you wholly is the only way the magic can work. Only through this magic can we truly work. I show you my character in this kiss, in this kiss I submit my being to you. I will offer you my soul to hold and examine. Destroy me if you find it wanting!”
Unexpectedly at this, Viarmo leant down and kissed me, gently at first but then with rising passion. Wrapping my arms around the back of his neck I pulled him close before I could question any further. Our kissing became more frantic as hands grasped and caressed. I found myself in his arms, being carried through the college and suddenly not caring if anyone should see. It had been too long since I had sex, right now I felt this to be right. To hell with over thinking the gender issues at play.
I found myself in his bedroom, still in character he threw me to the bed, in one swift motion he pulled my dress away, miraculously not tearing any buttons leaving me laid with exposed breasts and the transparent light red lace panties. These caused him to pause, and I noticed him come back to Viarmo.
“This I would like to enjoy as myself.”
He pulled off his own clothing revealing a large and very ready member that held my full attention. Gently climbing atop me he began to plant kisses on my face, my eyes, my mouth my cheeks then to my neck where he began to gently nuzzle. All the while his hands caressed me, one grasping my leg, the other working the nipple of my left breast. I began to release soft moans, involuntarily gyrating my hips, my eyes half closed in sheer bliss. His kisses continued down. Pausing at my right nipple, suddenly I felt a small explosion between my legs as I orgasmed, the red panties now sopping wet, my thighs wet and sticky. His kisses travelled again taking them down along my belly until he reached the fabric of my undergarmnets. At first he seemed content to kiss me through them, when without warning he pulled them down so that they remained hakf way down one leg with the other completely removed, my mound now utterly free, wet and ready. I moaned again as he probed with his tongue, working patiently all around the edges before darting toward my clitoris. Once again I climaxed and then again, awash in pleasure I felt a cutting disappointment as he moved his face away from my lower half only to realise a thrill of anticipation as he lined up his cock. He leant in for one more kiss, the taste of my love fresh upon his lips. Then he entered me, it was like nothing I had ever experienced before. There was a momentary pause as he reached my hymen, a smile formed on his lips before he thrust through it.
“It, it hurts…”
“Just for a moment my sweet, I promise the pain will turn to pleasure soon enough.”
He was right, I could already feel my desire rising again, his thrusts were gentle but insistent, my own body rose to meet each one, tingling going through my whole being.
“More… please… give me… more… ahhhhhhh”
He began to quicken his pace, his hands now grabbing me more firmly, he pulled one of my breasts into his mouth where he sucked greedily away. I found myself lost in ecstasy, another orgasm screamed out of my throat, my whole body trembling, demanding.
He had begun to become lost in his own pleasure, satisfied in my complete satisfaction he sped up further, small grunts now escaping his throat, his passion rose to a crescendo as he now pounded at me furiously. He burst out with a yell his cum shooting into me, filling me. The warm sensation brought me another climax of my own. He shuddered, thrusting a few more times. Hot semen continuing to flow into me. And then it was over, he gently rolled off me, instinctively I snuggled into the crook of his arm, one hand stoked my hair, the other my belly. After some time like this we fell asleep.
I awoke to night-time, he, already awake, looked down at me with a smile before handing me a damp towel. I stood up and quickly wiped myself over, the towel coming away red with my maiden blood as well as semen. I climbed back into the bed and his embrace, wanting to enjoy the moment.
After some time of comfortable silence I found my voice.
“So did Darlia accept Prospero’s contract and bind herself to him?”
“She did, knowing her ability to hold souls Propero handed her his own through their kiss, he put himself at her complete mercy and allowed her to judge the worth of his soul. She found him worthy and agreed to his marriage contract, he having submitted to her she now submitted to him.”
“And then?”
“Well, surely you can guess. The play is a tragedy after all, when Prospero handed her his soul he used his own power to hold a part of it back, the darker part. Subjugating her he combined their powers and wreaked havoc across Skyrim for decades until at last he was stopped by a man believed to ancestor to Tiber Septim.”
“And Darlia?”
“She was bound to Prospero, when he died, she died. Though some believe it was not magic that killed her but a broken heart. Whatever his deception, she still loved him.”
“I thought you were going to pick the last scene. Don’t suppose you picked that one for any reason at all?” I took any sting from my word with a sly smile.
He answered with a smile of his own, this then vanished and he took on an almost nervous expression.
“Perhaps, erm there are other scenes later. Representations if you will.”
His voice had become deeper and husky.
“Of course on stage we demonstrate such things through symbolism”
Feigning innocence I asked:
“Oh, what other scenes, what things? How would you represent a ‘binding love contract’?”
“Well I, that is, I have- no you will think me decadent!”
“You want to tie me up.”
He looked down seeming ashamed with himself. I had been too long under others control and power, to knowingly make myself helpless before seemed absurd and yet I felt a tingle of excitement.
I laid back with exaggerated care.
“Well, what are you waiting for? Go and get your rope.”
At that he practically leaped to his feet, crossing to a side cupboard he emerged holding some rope, but also a blindfold, a leather device with a ball and fastenings and a short leather switch. Trepidation filled me for a moment once more outweighed by excitement as I felt a dampness begin again at my legs and found there were certain things I enjoyed about being a woman. I allowed him to blindfold me, he then attached the ball device to my mouth, it acted as a kind of gag before binding me to the bed so that I could only move my hips and just to say wiggle my arms and legs.
Viarmo took on the voice of Prospero and I knew that he was now in character,
“Now dearest Darlia, you are mine, mine for eternity. Yet your hesitation wounded me, you must be punished.”
A thrill of anticipation shot through and a now familiar dampness between my legs. Helpless, I stared into the dark of the blindfold and waited. He teased me with the switch, running it gently along my body, rubbing my breasts before using its head to massage between my legs. I let out a soft groan through the gag. Out of nowhere a sharp pain lanced across my legs, then another on my arm, then the other arm. I tried to gasp but could only gag and choke before the next blow struck by right breast, then the left. The blows rained down faster and faster. I could only writhe against my bonds, my muffled screams drowned by the sound of the switch. A blow landed between my legs, then another and another. I came, just as the fourth blow landed and then they stopped. I lay panting raggedly, slick, sore and satisfied.
“You bore that well my dear and now… your reward.”
He entered me again, but in contrasts to the switch and indeed even the desperate passion of our first lovemaking, here he was gentle throughout. Small, almost timid thrusts drew me steadily to new levels of pleasure. All too soon it was over, both of us utterly spent. Tenderly he unbound me and once more we slept in one another’s arms.
The next morning, he walked me to the door, handing me the small stylish pack I had taken to carrying around.
“I can see that you are set on this path but be weary of that snake Therin. I know little of the man or your history but he does not strike me as a man to cross lightly. Keep yourself safe, know this, for one untrained you made an excellent Darlia. If ever the open road grows tiresome know that you will have a place at the bard’s college.”
“Thank you Viarmo, who knows what the future holds? Thank you for everything, the information you gave me is of great help but our night together, that has remade me.”
We had one last, lingering kiss before I made my way out of the college and out of Solitude. I quickly changed into my armour behind the stables. Opening my pack to make sure I had everything I found a small, familiar ancient looking text with a letter attached:
‘To my darling Darlia,
To a man who has spent a lifetime peddling grand pronouncements, who has orated moving speeches, given life to poetry I am horrified to confess that I cannot put into words what our evening meant to me. That a darling rose as you, in the early bloom of life should honour me with loves first kiss has moved me beyond all reason. I may never be adequately able to thank you but I hope this humble gift may prove some small measure of my esteem.
Yours eternally,
Your Prospero.’

With tears in my eyes I quickly flipped through the copy of Darlia, the Eternal Bride. Wrapping it in a watertight cover I replaced it in the small pack. I climbed atop Masha, ready to be off before I lost my nerve and stayed here forever. I had not been long on the road when I encountered a Khajit caravan. Hailing them it seemed that they too were heading toward Whiterun. Judging there to be safety in numbers I joined them. We made good time, the Khajit had a wealth of wonderful stories, all filled with the most outrageous lies. It was me that spotted the tell-tale signs of ambush, from the perfect setting of overlooking bushes to the eerie too quiet of the road.
“Ambush!”
The Khajit scrambled to position, an arrow striking where the leaders head had been a second ago. The bandits rushed out, equal to our number. They were ill equipped and with the advantage of surprise gone they should have abandoned the attack but still they rushed out. I faced off against a bandit thug with a rusty looking greatsword. I waited for his attack, once he committed I took a step back, his attack fell short but his added momentum brought him close to my range, dashing forward I landed two clean slashes with Dragonsting before whirling away to his side. Instinctively he tried to bring the greatsword around for another attack which is what I had been waiting for. I kept turning to the right and again his attack missed leaving him unbalanced. I hamstrung him with one attack before slashing across his throat with the other <level 1> panting I looked around at my companions. Whilst I had certainly fought well this was the kind of opponent once completely below my notice and it seemed now that even success in battle brought me no great strides forward as it once had. Even before becoming the Dragonborn successful battle had seemed to physically and mentally unlock something within me. Now I just felt tired. I would have to either get my old form back or learn to rein in my ambitions and accept my new place in life.
These thoughts weighed heavily on my mind as I walked into Whiterun. I had changed again, this time favouring a simpler light blue dress as the sensibilities of Whiterun were less ostentatious than those of Solitude, a simple white thong lay underneath. My mind still troubling me I decided to be honest with myself and accept that even if I could find Therin his power and ability to cosy up to those in authority may make it impossible for me to force him to undo the damage that had been done. I wiped away a tear at the first true realisation that I could be stuck this way.
With this in mind I knew I would have to build bridges with people, I owned a home here in Whiterun and with changing fortunes may never earn enough to buy another home elsewhere. Resolved, I walked toward the Bannered Mare, curious looks followed me as I was recognised. Walking into the common room I noticed Mikael just finishing a song:
“For the age of aggression is just about done.”
I walked straight toward him, out of the corner of my eye I noticed a man nudge and wink at his drinking partner.
“Why look who it is, the girl who wanted to play at being an adventurer until she took a dive in the mood and was stripped before the whole city! I see you are now in a dress, it seems I showed you your place, or are you here for a rematch?”
Despite his words there was a slight nervous tremble to his free hand as if expecting a fist to flash across his jaw. Instead of this I offered him a meek bow, my hands clasped submissively below my waist. It burned me to do this but I needed a resolution with Mikael if I would make a life here, the only other way would be to win a fist fight which after last time I would not risk again. A second loss would ruin me. Still in my bow, my face pointed at the floor I spoke:
“I… I, haaah… I am here to apologise.” I noticed the trembling in his hand stop.
“I lashed out at you, misjudged you and your intentions. I was foolish and out of line. You taught me a valuable lesson and in truth I am grateful to you. Truly I beg your pardon, please?”
I was aware of him staring down at me, also suddenly aware that the top of my bosom was straining against the dress. My face flushed. The whole tavern had gone deathly quiet and the silence seemed to last an age.
“Hmm your words seem sincere and yet…”
My heart sank.
“… And yet your posture needs work. You beg you say? That doesn’t look like begging to me.”
Making myself a further source of ridicule had not been my plan, if I were to walk away now people would probably sympathise with me. I had after all come here on good faith but then I judged the mood in the room. Whatever the rights and wrongs I sensed that they wanted more, the entertainment had just begun, if I were to walk away I would ruin that. Any spreading word of me would not be flattering. Just one more indignity might yet yield another route for me should I need it. Pausing only a moment longer I sank to me knees, and looked up at Mikael to wait his cue.
“Well, did you have something you wanted to say to me?” Light laughter echoed in the silence. Just over Mikael’s shoulder I noticed Uthgerd looking on in disgust. With a stab of guilt, I continued.
“Please, I wronged you I beg of you to forgive me.” I stared into his cruel, petty eyes. My self-loathing outweighing any anger I felt toward him. I was only dimly aware of the tears streaming down my face.
“Kiss my feet and we shall call it even.” He laughed.
Once more I decided I would yield, yet as I reached toward his foot he backed away and walked a few steps away from me.
“Crawl.”
The laughter was louder now, taken up by more throats. And so I crawled. I had hoped that the new form would shield me, that I could pretend in my mind that it was not me. It was not me crawling, it was not my choice but that of somebody else. Yet, placing a kiss on his feet, I knew that this in some way represented a small part of myself that had been locked away. Overwhelmed by machismo and warrior machinations this passive side of myself had never had chance to grow. But the warrior in me was now cursed and the suppressed submissive part had grown. No sooner had I placed the kiss than I jumped to my feet and ran to the exit. Desperate to get away, I ran all the way to Breezehome yet could not outrun the shame that followed me. I did nothing for the rest of the day. I slept a fitful night before leaving on the morning, heading to the market. Yet it seemed my foolish gambit had paid off. Sure, there were mocking smiles and snide chuckles, these were outdone by looks of sympathy. I had, in a hard way earned a place for myself in Whiterun should I need it. A part of me still hoped I would not need it and I focused on what I had come here to do. Find Therin and persuade him somehow to change me back.
I made my way to Dragonsreach and sought out the court mage Farengar.
“Excuse me, have you by any chance seen the mage Therin?”
“Therin? Why do people always ask for Therin? I have been the court wizard here for ten years now and suddenly this stranger swans in and the Jarl ups and decides I need help. That I am distracted by my ‘obsession’ with dragons. Obsession?! When they are swooping in left and right, people sucking their souls out. That’s not an obsession that is current events. He’s sneaky mark me, seems to spend a lot of the Jarl’s gold. All on magic protection for the city he says, will cut a dragon right out of the air. HA! I know his-“
I realised I would need to cut him off or be there all day
“Ye,s but have you seen him recently?”
“Sure, he’s where he always at, up top on the balcony. Says his Sky defence research works better there. Say, what’s your interest in him anyway?”
“My interest is my own, I’ll be going now.”
I sensed that I had not dissuaded him from prying further, no sooner had I turned away from him than I heard him move quickly away toward the Jarl’s throne room. Moving quickly myself I reached the balcony and walked forward to see a figure in blue robes. I had brought Dragonsting with me. Seeing him look busy I picked up a nearby tray and made believe I may be a serving girl and walked toward him. As I got within ten feet however I stopped. My body suddenly unable to move, a paralyzing spell had me held tight.
“Ah Dragonborn, you have arrived. You were… taller when last we spoke? Hahaha” I couldn’t tell what annoyed me more. My sudden paralysis or his laughing at his own jokes. The spell began to wear away but I knew that the paralysis had simply been a display of power not a genuine need for caution.
“If you would be so kind as to throw your dagger over here” Again this was a mere power play but I complied having no other recourse.
“I must confess I was shocked when I received Belgarth’s letter, don’t judge him he is after all just looking after his daughter. That the mighty Dragonborn had been transformed such. I knew my former apprentice was incompetent but I could not have guessed that he would do this to you?”
“So you set this all up?! How, why?”
“I’m just supposed to tell you my plan? Very well, it’s so rare I get chance to be honest with people. Since I was a boy I have been obsessed with eternal life. Living forever as the Altmer of ages past did. So I began to research using my family’s wealth and power to accumulate resources and papers that I may have needed. Eventually I was led to the legend of Prospero, the Nordic sorcerer who had achieved eternal life. This brought me to Skyrim. Through my research at Belgarth’s manor I realised I needed the essence of a hero and so allowed Belgarth to escape knowing he would track down the lands most renown warrior. He had often talked of you with his daughter Helena in excitement as they heard the latest bard songs and tales of your exploits. What I had not planned was for you to best me, luckily, I always have a contingency; the curse. Knowing your only solution would be to go to the mage college and seek out my errant apprentice the only thing he could do would be to extract your essence into a soul gem. I had believed the process would kill you but here you are.”
“Please, change me back. I’ll do anything. I-“
He was shaking with laughter.
“Change you back? Priceless. Once I learned of your survival I had thought you might seek me out with such a hope, though in truth I did not expect such a lovely transformation.”
“Are you saying you won’t or can’t”
“Both. The essence needed to change you back I have every intention of using to secure my own immortality. It has taken me years to research and find the missing pieces, only this remains. That is the won’t. But my dear, you do not realise how lucky you were to survive the process the first time around. Even cursed your body, mind spirit and soul were still strong. Any attempt to undo what has now been done, in your current form, would kill you. You no longer have the vitality to survive being stripped back so far.”
I was not aware at what point during this revelation. Utter defeat washed over me, to be stuck this way for my remaining days. My grand destiny gone, so much of purpose defeated. To be a permanent object of lust. I was crushed by the impending fate, of having to choose to simper or be put down. Vaguely I became aware of him speaking again.
“- I will ask you again where is it? Where is the soul- hmm could it be that you were stupid enough to bring it with you?”
He reached for my little pack, I did not even try to stop him opening it up he lifted out the soul gem and cried in triumph.
“THIS IS IT? AFTER ALL MY YEARS OF SEARCHING! AND- wait, what have we here?”
He rummaged further and pulled free the book given to me by Visarmo and began to read the note
“My, my, my Dragonborn perhaps you should be thanking me for your change hmm? It seems you have derived some pleasure from it, and what gift has he give- this is it?”
He pulled it open, the page naturally falling on the last read scene.
“You know, there was a second part of my plan, for what is eternity without someone to share it with. I knew that within this play lead the secret to finding a woman suitable. Helena, beautiful as she was resisted any spell of control. Yet this makes perfect sense, someone that can hold more than one soul? Why you would simply need to place a dominant piece of your own within the bride and- now who do I know that can hold more than one soul. Oh Dragonborn, it seems my interest in you has just begun, and you have handed it right to me. To think how much of the fool Jarl’s resources I wasted to try and exert pressure to get this text to me without success and then you bring it right along. Why its as if-“
“STOP RIGHT THERE THERIN!”
I turned to see the Jarl of Whiterun and his bodyguard along with Farengar and a whole cadre of Whiteurn guards standing at the entrance of the entrance to the balcony.
Not wasting time Therin ran to the balcony, just before leaping off he shouted back
“We will meet again Dragonborn, find me in Windhelm.”
With that he leaped into the open sky yet I knew that through some trick of magic he would survive.
The Jarl walked toward me, staring long and hard.
“Dragonborn? So for once the rumours are actually true, the lands greatest warrior has been turned into a little girl.
My whole world feel for what seemed the hundredth time. There would be no stopping this getting out, where rumours had existed from a single eye witness now many guards would talk. I was known in this form around Whiterun, my description would spread. People far and wide would- oh gods, Whiterun! The site where I had been stripped, and humiliated by a bard no less. No doubt he would soon be singing a new song in my honour.
“Y,y,yes Jarl, it’s true.” So in a shaking voice I explained all, the guards listening in intently. When I was done the jarl spoke.
“It was a noble thing you did but foolish, the land needed a hero not a little girl, two little girls I suppose counting you and this Helena. I cannot track Therin down in Windhelm without declaring my city for a side in the war. That I will not do. If there is anything left of what you once were you must be the one to find him and end this madness you have started.”
With that he walked away, I left Dragonsreach and retuned home. Seeing my Houscarl Lydia on route I tried to catch her eye but she spat in disgust, shame in her eyes.