The limerick thread

[Hitman69]

 

I decided to start up a game,

Something to get me some fame,

So my chosen gimmick,

Is a thread full of lim'ricks,

So please reply with one and the same.

 

 

 

 

Please note, though,

The previous, it is just for show,

'twas not by me,

and as you can see,

't came from the fora of xkcd

 

 

(http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=14&t=4622)

[Sparlimb]

Yes! A challenging and creative endeavor

filled with nonsense and jokes, sometimes clever.

If you've got the time

and can make it all rhyme

this thread could go on forever!

[Sparlimb]

I just noticed the thread start date,

sorry to have jumped in so late.

If others won't do

the voodoo we do,

I'm proud to step up to the plate!

[Sparlimb]

Some very cool mods have been done

allowing for all sortsa new fun.

But when these women came to me

swelling from Tomago, you see,

all I could think of was RUN!

 

I stayed and awaited my fate,

wondering how I was gonna placate,

when through the front door

came in three more!

No way could I escape this date.

 

Lucky for me, the danger had passed

when they saw the gold I'd amassed.

Now my retirement's delayed

my treasure waylaid,

but man, did I have a blast!

[Guest Loogie]

Loogie thought the thread lacked a classic

Brought an antique, durable like plastic

If you read down below

There's a rhyme you should know

'Bout a man who can stretch like elastic

 

There once was a man from Nantucket

Whose dick was so long he could suck it

He said with a grin

As he wiped off his chin

"If my ear were a pussy, I'd fuck it."

[Mailamea]

Loogie u god darn genious that made me rofl so hard.

[Sparlimb]

The "Man from Nantucket", greatest of all!

A genuine classic, never to fall.

My memory is hazy

or brain is just lazy,

with others I try to recall.

 

[Hitman69]

I have a rhyme 'bout neutrinos in flight

that, much to scientist's spite,

seem to have a special aspect,

which renders Relativity imperfect

It seems they go faster than light...

 

EDIT (following two, not the third/fourth):

 

The diff'rence in speed is minute,

but the errors do not refute,

I want to explain it, in rhyme

but it took me some time,

findin the words, to explain this dispute

 

 

Now, we take the value of "v",

And we take its modulo "c"

Multiply by ten to the sixth

and what we've just fixed,

is five with a sigma of zero-point-three

 

 

While we're on the subject of relativity, here's another one for you (not mine, mind you. This one comes from xkcd).

 

There once was a fencer from Fisk,

whose thrust was quite brisk.

So quick was his action,

that Lorentz-contraction

Turned his rapier into a disk