Dragonborn funny Dailouge

[Guest Lady Luck]

Episode 1a " oblivion wher?!"

" Written by Adam  "

This is a quest dailouge he made when hes bored was supposed to be in dark hearts dlc but the idea was cancel for you enjoyment he let me copy and paste his script and let you guys read it

 

Scene 1

" player walks to helgen , Mission objective Kill skooma dragon"

 

Dovahkiin

" ahhh another day another mead, hello my hard rocking axe friend how are you today"

 

Wood elf

" runn ..  the town is overun by SKOOOMAA"

 

Dovahkiin

" by the eight  , wait i know this .. seriously it's look familiar..."

 

wood elf

" run .. don't look back skooma is attacking"
 

dovahkiin

" oh yeah kvatch scene, now i remember!, that's like phew 200 years ago "

 

[ player talks to the panic wood elf]

 

dovahkiin

"  what's wrong my friend"

 

wood elf

" Skooma oh it burn!"

 

dovahkiin

" dude i seriously think this elf has brain problem"

 

Lydia

" totally"

 

Wood elf

" You..must kill it .. i mean it!"

 

dovahkiin

" WTF?"

 

Quest journal activated

" Bring down skooma"

 

dovahkiin

" Hey i don't even ask the mission objective yet damn you bethesda"

 

[ player walks into ruined tower , find skooma ghost]

 

skomma ghost

" Yess!!..YESS!! YESSS!!! " [m.bison reference]

 

dovahkiin

" shhh.. i think i heard something"

 

skomma ghost

" wait whos there?!"

 

dovahkiin

* makes a cat sound *

 

skomma ghost

"  nobody gets my skooma you get it , it's mine! i brew it specially for me!"

 

dovahkiin

" Lydia a plan you creep on the corner take this bow and shoot him"

 

lydia

" where?"

 

dovahkiin

" to the knee"

 

lydia

" are u that dumb ghosts dont even had bones"

 

dovahkiin

"excuseme , it's skyrim everything is killable here even ghost now go"

 

lydia

" if i got raped by that bastard,  you owe me a mead alot of them"

 

dovahkiin

" fine i treat you the whole inn if i had too  , now go !"

 

skooma ghost

" Sweet ,sexy bottle oh if i- i ... was alive and well i would marry you "

 

lydia

" yuck this ghost is disgusting , he is obsessed with that thing.."

 

skooma ghost

" i know i heard something !,  die mortal "

 

lydia

" arrow ...kneee ARRGHH"

 

dovahkiin

" now its my chance Steal the SKOOMA!"

 

skomma ghost

" Wait no you fool!,  you have no idea what's in it

 

[player drinks enchanted skooma]

 

dovahkiin

" whoa it's awosome !"

 

skomma ghost

"  ouu wtf man?"

 

lydia

" whaddya know you can kill him after all "

 

dovahkiin

" sovngarddee... tittiess and ladies "

 

skomma ghost

" too late hes an addict

 

lydia

" god i hope farengar have  the cure"

 

lol...