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Hey, it's me Destana. I just wanted to have an aside for a minute. This is one of the worst parts of my journey. I was abused, I was downtrodden. Generally a bad time. Skyrim will chew you up and spit you out if you let it. I think this contributed to me being as hard as I am now. Probably contributed to me being an amoral asshole absolute killer too. To continue my story... Day 0: The Evening in Jail The guards all took turns beating me with whips and fucking me. What is it about Skyrim guards that makes them all devoid of human sympathy? Only a few scars this time. I collapsed on the pile of hay in the corner. Day 1: The Pillory The next morning the jailer dragged me to the city, naked. I had to stand all day in the square, butt hanging out in the stocks. Surprisingly, nobody took advantage of me, hanging out like that. I just had to be out in the sun. All day. At the end of the day the jailer took me back to my cell and had his way with me again and whipped me. I didn't have the will to fight back anymore. Day 2: X in the square The next day I was again brought into the square, chained to a big wooden X and made to wait all day. A few people came by and groped me. But that was it. That night the jailer had his way with me again and whipped me, but none of the guards joined in this time. Already old news, I guess. Day 3: The Blue Palace "The Jarl requests your presence," the jailer said, waking me up. He slapped me in my irons again. The next thing I knew, I was thrown in a cell in the Jarl's palace and the jailer went off to do some business in the palace. There was a mirror, a wash basin, plants... food and drink that hadn't been carelessly thrown on the floor. As I laid on the green bed I realized that for the first time I was comfortable. As I looked at myself in the mirror I realized just how out-of-body I'd been the last few days. I was covered in red stripes. I touched a few, still burning from all the whippings and realized I'd have a roadmap of scars that would never heal. I slept again, and nobody bothered me for at least a couple hours. My first visitor came by a couple hours into my sleep. Dressed in sleek-looking steel armor and no helm with a dirty face, it was the housecarl Bolgeir Bearclaw. The jailer didn't come with him but I imagine the conversation went something like this: "Hey Bolgeir, want to see the new treat I brought for the Jarl and her men?" The Jailer smirked. Bolgeir stoically grabbed the Jailer by the collar. He thought for a second, then said, "Give me the key and don't bother me, you freak. I'll lock up when I'm done." He wasn't rough like most the other men. He wasn't loving by any means. It was a facefuck. But when I started to choke he slowed down. Then when he was done, having said nothing, he left and locked the door. The second visitor was a no-name guard a few hours later. The Jailer watched him and when he was done, he said he'd had better and they left after dropping food and water on the floor. Third visitor was a woman named Una. It was super quick, her not even bothering to take her clothes off. She told me to lay down, hiked up her skirt and got on top of me and I realized.... this woman had a dick! Maybe that's why she'd been so secretive... a rare sight in Skyrim. Though... she wasn't really much of a looker. As I laid there and took another dick for the hundredth time against my will I robotically thought about my cycle. Thank the gods I wasn't near ovulation. IF I ever got out of here I thought might need to take a few Potions of Damage Fertility. And with that, the day was over. The Jailer left me in the Jarl's palace. I overheard him talking to someone. Apparently the Jarl had been very busy planning her husband's funeral and hadn't had time for her or her inner circle to take part in their new playtoy (me). Of course, he had to fuck me one more time before he left. I remember him choking me this time. Day 4: Jarl's Palace Part 2 Just when I was getting used to the comfort of sheets and an actual bed, I was dragged out of my slumber early in the morning. "Shh!" The dunmer shushed me. It was a thief, burgling the palace. I scanned the room, realizing he'd picked the lock to my cell and let himself in. So it must be unlocked now. For the first time in days I saw a glimmer of hope. "You with the guild?" I whispered. "You kiddin me, lass? I'm startin' me own outfit! Shut up while I get mine and I might just leave the door open for ye," the thief grinned. He pushed me on my back in the bed and started, but he only got about halfway through before the guards rushed in, having been alerted. They fought and killed him right there in the cell and relocked the door. Damn. Later that day, my fifth visitor was a housecarl named Erikur. I think he held his arms behind my back and took me from behind. Barely memorable. And then the sixth visitor: Another random guard. He didn't even bother to take his helmet off, which was probably good for him. I wonder if he could see the murder in my eyes. However, he did decide to do an anal jackhammer. With that, the day was over. The jailer threw food on me again, not even bothering to fuck me. Gods, I can't believe I just said it like that. Day 5: Jarl's Palace Again. Orgy Day. My seventh visitor came pretty early in the morning. And to this day I can't remember his name. Redguard with the traditional 'redguard garb,' which to me sounds like a racist statement by the Nords who labeled the clothing, but whatever. Perhaps sensing a kindred spirit in this harsh land he wasn't rough. He gently had me suck him and then he went doggystyle. "Thanks," he said when he was done. "You don't have to thank her you fool, she's basically meat," the jailer said to him. My eighth visitor was a little different. A little older, but still pretty good looking, I believe it was Olfina Grey-Mane the barmaid. That's not the interesting part though. Apparently she'd requested a threesome with me and the jailer. For once, this actually felt pretty good. Only five days and I was starting to sympathize with my captors. I had already taken an interest in the Jarl's problems. Speaking of which, it seemed the court had let up in busy-ness that night, because our threesome drew a crowd. When we changed positions from being fucked while Olfina sat on my face, I noticed the Jarl was sitting on the bed in the onlooking room. Erikur, Bolgeir and her steward Falk Firebeard were standing around her, cheering for us. I remember Falk calling me a whore (which... you try being a prisoner!!). The court wizard Sybille was there too. Watching us inspired them to start grouping up and fucking. First, Sybille with Erikur. The jailor and Olfina finished and left and I was stuck there, watching. I remember thinking Elisif must be lonely from her husband passing as she took got DP'ed by Falk and Bolgeir. (Dammit, I'm doing it again)! It's easy to look back on these times with nostalgia and not be despondent about it. As they say, there is a sickness in this land that needed to be cut out. A mission that I have still not yet accomplished. Day 6: Parade In the morning the jailer came and got me in the morning and took me outside. I wasn't sure if we were going back to the actual prison, or the pillory or whatever. But he just told me to walk. When I hesitated for a second, he whipped me mercilessly. Gritting my teeth, I took off. But he had some form of invisible leash, and he pulled me off my feet. At this point, a crowd had started to gather and they heckled me. Just what I needed. After a few hours of walking in circles and being beaten, I was put in an outside cell. It was a good 40 feet off the ground. I considered escaping, but I was worn out. I slept on the pile of hay on the iron grate under me, my naked burning skin exposed to the elements. I woke up shivering several times, thinking I was going to freeze to death. Day 7: The Wheel In the morning the Jailer yanked me down from my perch, a group of guards catching me. This, like the pillory, was ultimately more boring than anything. Nobody bothered me, but it was very uncomfortable. We sat there until midnight. (Seriously, does this guy not have any other prisoners to torment?) Day 8: The Inn At midnight, the jailer said, "The local drunks need entertainment, and you're going to provide it." He pulled my invisible leash until we were at the Winking Skeever. He locked me in a room by myself and threw some old bread and a ... mana potion on the ground while he went to find would-be rapists. I drank it. It was fluid. Fuck it. He came back in two minutes with two men. I don't even think I ever knew their names, but one fucked me from behind while the other facefucked me. When they were done the jailer force-fed me an 'Archmage,' a drug that worked kind of like a potion, but started the user spiraling down the road to addiction. Moments like these... I had to wonder if I was going to make it out of this experience alive. This was a dull fear. Not like the Thalmor attempted rape, which was me hanging off a cliff. This was a slippery slope to a pit of spikes that I was clawing at to stay alive. And losing. The men dumped me on the inn floor and I remember weeping as I lay there. A small child approached my naked and broken form and said something child-like, but my entire consciousness was getting hazy from lack of food and water. Tears staining my cheeks, I decided I was going to do whatever I could now. I was an animal backed into a corner. The jailer had walked off, making the error of leaving the child in the room with me. Obviously the kid of a barmaid or some such. "Call... for your mother," I whispered, "I'm a dangerous prisoner." The child seemed to immediately realize she was in a deadly situation because she called for her mother to unlock the inn room door. "I think she's in here. Oh thank goodness!" The mother shouted as she embraced her daughter. Perfect. There was a dagger on her hip. Thank Talos. Using all the strength I could muster, I stealthed and shut the door behind her. I checked the woman's goods and lifted the Steel Dagger from her person. Then I waited. The door slid open again. The Jailer stood there as the mother and child filed out. I'm a monster, but I'm not that much of a monster. Yet. I jumped forward onto the jailer's back and stabbed at his throat. He turned and laughed. (His health bar barely moved!) He knocked me to the ground, clapping me one more time and I fell unconscious. Day 9: As I woke up back in the original prison, the jailor smiled through the bars. He opened the door and pulled me out, like he had so many times. As I dragged my feet along, he led me outside. Another parade? Gods, I was so tired. Suddenly he turned to me and said, "Have you thought about how bad it is to break the law?" And of course, I had a gag in my mouth, as I often did while we were travelling. Realizing his mistake, he smirked, and said, "Don't answer that." "I was originally going to free you on day 10, which is coming up." "The reason the hold trusts me so much is because I can rehabilitate prisoners in two weeks or less. That is my guarantee. You know how I have a 100% track record?" He paused, but, again I couldn't answer. "Because the ones that I don't rehabilitate in that time I sell to the Riften Slave Auction," he smirked before he blasted me with a green-tinted spell. I dropped to the ground, paralyzed, "Can't be clubbing you over the head. Don't want to damage the merchandise. After that stunt you pulled yesterday you're lucky I didn't skewer you." And then everything faded to black.