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1d12 roll for a gaping anus!

demongoat

By demongoat,
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demongoat

demongoat

Posted
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so i was just thinking, "self, i'm on a website dedicated to big boobs, vaginas, and rpg video games, you know what is missing? thats right! references to pen and paper rpgs!"

 

so i give you my friends, F.A.T.A.L: Fantasy Adventure To Adult Lechery

or From Another Time; Another Land depending on where you get it.

the only roleplaying game where you can roll for how big your vagina is, how deep it is, and the circumference.

 

hey did you ever want to roll how many fingers you can fit in your asshole? or how big your nipples are? did you ever miss the added realism of rolling to see if an ogre can fit a fist in your vag? now you can!

 

also included: pointless OCD charts of everything that no one in their right mind should give a shit about.

ignorance of medieval history

misogyny, and lots of it!

badly photocopied images of the tools who made it trying to act "badass" with swords!

and more proof that sniffing glue and listening to heavy metal music don't mix.

 

all in 900 glorious pages for your entertainment!

said to be one of the worst rpgs ever by rpgnet!

FATAL

 

also found is a link to the website from the wayback in all its mid 90's glory!

EPIC!

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demongoat

demongoat

Posted
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"FATAL is over-complex' date=' incoherent, racist, misogynist, and deviant... yay?

in a bad way" Awh. D:

 

*tries it anyways*

*PDF loaded*

*3 seconds later*

[img']http://www.brutoz.net/images/smilies/Yao%20Ming.gif[/img]

 

Though.. Shouldn't this be in the adult stuff thread, or the 'adult games'/'hentai games'?

 

i thought it was for video games, i guess if the mods feel it would be better there?

i posted this just because it made me laugh at how terrible it is, what can i say hehe. if it wasn't so full of ignorance the thought of rolling a dice to see what can fit in your asshole is pretty funny right?

 

 

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Sand_Dragon

Sand_Dragon

Posted
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Naw dude, it's a 900+ page book of horror. I mean, it's actually possible to roll for your anal circumference and get a negative value.

 

Or memorably, have a really smelly half devil guy who is also somehow super attractive? The entire thing is poorly conceived.

 

(also the rulebook's entire premise is flawed, but that's another story)

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Kuroshu

Kuroshu

Posted
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I said Interesting, Instead of "Horror" I see it as funny. I mean come on! Rolling for the size of your rectum is funny as hell!

 

What Premise? I though it was just more of a Life RP that had adult material. But then again I didn't read the entire thing.

 

Oh speaking of RP. I was just playing Bully on my ps2 and I just past a scne where the "nerds" were playing a RP. One of them said "You can't make the princess do that!" then the other guy goes, "Yes I can I have the diplomacy skill." What was he trying to make the princess do? It's up to your imagination.

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Sand_Dragon

Sand_Dragon

Posted
Posted

What Premise? I though it was just more of a Life RP that had adult material. But then again I didn't read the entire thing.

 

FATAL stands for From Another Time, Another Land. It used to stand for Fantasy Adventures to Adult Lechery.

 

The premise is basically that it's medieval europe with no Christianity, and only white people (for some reason). That alone is weird, that's like saying "an ocean without water".

 

The whole thing is supposed to be a more "adult" fantasy game, but they add so many checks that the whole thing gets ridiculous. It's been a while since I've read the whole thing, but if I remember correctly there was a stat for how far your urine stream could reach.

 

It could have been one of those "so bad it's good" RPGs like Synibarr (which is so bad it's funny) or Rifts (which is terrible mechanically, but has fantastic backstory and fluff), but instead it's just a huge unsexy kludge of rules that have results that AREN'T LOGICALLY POSSIBLE, which is from which the horror stems. Basically the ratio of "funny" to "terrible" is highly unfavorable.

 

Basically the longer the main rulebook, the more useless stuff you're gonna find in it. I mean, if you want the sexy stuff that could happen in any game you're playing as long as the DM/GM and other players are cool with it, regardless if it's Call of Cthulhu (elder god tentacle rape, or whatever) or Shadowrun (seriously, cyberpunk). If you're after the humor, what little humor exists in FATAL is unintentional and doesn't make up for the diseased package that is the whole.

 

Yeah, that's a whole tangent there, but the rules are a mess. I hate when the rules are a mess.

 

Also as to that one scene in Bully: he was totally trying to seduce the Princess. Given that it's definitely a D&D pastiche they're playing, "roll to seduce" is one of the things I've heard entirely too many times.

 

Although one time my housemates, who I DM for, started getting freaky at the game table. It was hilarious, because they were trying to be in character and everything. "UH YEAH, SO MY RANGER TOTALLY STRIPS YOUR HALF ELF WIZARD DOWN TO HER NETHERS"

 

Which is even funnier in an Italian accent. I had to call the whole thing off to avert another "sex vampire" incident.

 

*As a side note, to my knowledge no one has ever actually played a game of FATAL. Most (like me) don't even get past the hopelessly obtuse character creation system. I think the ones that do are sucked into some kind of eldritch rape dimension where the only things are tentacle monsters and shame.

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