Random complaint generator

[gvman3670]

Here, try this. It's fun. And can even add some spice to your forum experience.

 

For example, I'd like to complain about ol' Dark0ne over at Nexus. So I slip his name in there and I got this at random.....

 

My complaint about Dark0ne

 

In all my letters, I try harder than anything else to make myself clear. I try to state things as simply and unambiguously as I can because I find that that's the best way to convince my readers that Dark0ne expresses hostile odium toward anyone who intends to cast a gimlet eye on his vaporings. In the text that follows, when I quote from him, I will use the word “excrement” in place of another word which is now apparently permitted in general circulation publications and which I have edited out. I know more about incendiarism than most people. You might even say that I'm an expert on the subject. I can therefore state with confidence that Dark0ne's monographs have created a yellow-bellied, two-faced universe devoid of logic and evidence. Only within this universe does it make sense to say that Dark0ne is a refined gentleman with the soundest education and morals you can imagine. Only within this universe does it make sense to provide financial support to backwards banana republics and their temulent dictators. And, only if we improve the lot of humankind can we destroy this loathsome universe of his and put an end to his evildoing.

 

Although I can find only circumstantial evidence of misconduct and rule violations, if I didn't sincerely believe that Dark0ne's peevish smear tactics bring to mind the maxim that Dark0ne needs to internalize the external truth that he is trying to fill our children's minds with raving and debasing superstitions just to prove he can, then I wouldn't be writing this letter. His opinion is that his vices are the only true virtues. Of course, opinions are like sphincters: we all have them. So let me tell you my opinion. My opinion is that Dark0ne's faculty for deception is so far above anyone else's, it really must be considered different in kind as well as in degree.

 

Dark0ne is like the man behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz. Pull back the curtain of cronyism and you'll see an uncouth shirker hiding behind it, furiously pulling the levers of conspiracism in an unregenerate attempt to peddle the snake oil of insurrectionism-oriented ruffianism. That sort of discovery should make any sane person realize that many of us are too naïve and trusting. It takes a lot of convincing to get us to see a person as inherently jealous or inherently overbearing. Alas, Dark0ne is doing all he can to provide us with unmistakable proof that he is inherently both. For instance, Dark0ne exhibits an air of superiority. You realize, of course, that that's really just a defense mechanism to cover up his obvious inferiority. Help me help people see Dark0ne's philopolemical apothegms for what they are. Join your hands with mine in this, the greatest cause of our time.

[gvman3670]

http://www.pakin.org/complaint

 

Try it out. Use it. Have fun with it.

[gregathit]

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