First of:
Second Picture.. If anyone would stare at me like that, I would either shit my pants or punch them in the face.. Terrifying glares both of them look like they were going to literately eat him ?

Small critic to your pacing: It sometimes is way to fast and confusing to follow, specially from spoiler 2 to 5, afterwards it gets better until shortly before they meet the necro, then it gets confusingly fast again. Maybe take a little bit more time their travels and venturing, or make the transitions a little bit smoother. ?

Next small critic would be that you try to shove a lot of things in one entry, fixing Dantes Face and revealing the scars to be a curse feel.. Out of place and not earning any symphathy because of them being in a dangerous situation all around. (Well kinda, nothing is dangerous when Wulfy is around )

Maybe that part could've gotten his own little story later.

So, now to the more fun part for me:

Most of your shoots were amazing and super focused, the mushroom is a tiny little horny shit and I love her for that ?

Wuulfniir being Wuulfniir, he can't do any wrong in my book, so anything with him in it gets 5 stars immediately 

Loria needs to learn common sense.. And restraint..? I know a guy who could teach her a bit discipline..

And Lifa is scary as heck the past few chapters...   R.I.P anybody stupid enough to try to fight her in the future. ?

All in all, a sometimes confusing but very informative Entry ? 

1 hour ago, Gukahn said:

Small critic to your pacing: It sometimes is way to fast and confusing to follow, specially from spoiler 2 to 5, afterwards it gets better until shortly before they meet the necro, then it gets confusingly fast again. Maybe take a little bit more time their travels and venturing, or make the transitions a little bit smoother. ?

1 hour ago, Gukahn said:

Next small critic would be that you try to shove a lot of things in one entry, fixing Dantes Face and revealing the scars to be a curse feel.. Out of place and not earning any symphathy because of them being in a dangerous situation all around. (Well kinda, nothing is dangerous when Wulfy is around )

Maybe that part could've gotten his own little story later.

yeah fair critiques, lots of things got cut in this entry to make it fit, and I still went over 200 screens and about 4000 words, really should have probably made this two entries to give more room to smooth things out like i had planned for a bit. X.x

as far as Dante's face is concerned... I didn't want it to be some big deal, more like, the healers are dipshits that cant tell the difference between a scar and a lingering curse in their own fantasy world. easy to fix as soon as someone can tell that difference. I do see your point though.

hopefully these wont be a problem in the future entries. They(those entries) matter a lot more than this one will(really this one  only matters for the last two scenes.) So I'll be doing much more focused entries for those. 

2 hours ago, Gukahn said:

Wuulfniir being Wuulfniir, he can't do any wrong in my book, so anything with him in it gets 5 stars immediately 

really the rest of the group doesn't deserve him. 

1 hour ago, Gukahn said:

Most of your shoots were amazing and super focused, the mushroom is a tiny little horny shit and I love her for that ?

thanks, and I hope i succeeded in making an expressionless mushroom interesting enough? i learned a lot in blender for that thing my brain may never recover?

2 hours ago, Gukahn said:

Loria needs to learn common sense.. And restraint..? I know a guy who could teach her a bit discipline..

Aye she will learn, maybe... her past would make her very used to living dangerously, so she might just go on a shoplifting spree instead. as far as discipline goes, I do want to get them some rope and chains to play with.?

2 hours ago, Gukahn said:

And Lifa is scary as heck the past few chapters...   R.I.P anybody stupid enough to try to fight her in the future. ?

I told you she develops a cruel side?  but as far as her fighting skills go, she has yet to fight anything really powerful. 

2 hours ago, yorpers said:

yeah fair critiques, lots of things got cut in this entry to make it fit, and I still went over 200 screens and about 4000 words, really should have probably made this two entries to give more room to smooth things out like i had planned for a bit. X.x

Yeah, I remember you saying that cutting stuff out x,x

But I also understand you wanting to get this out of the way asap. I have those moments too, something that you just do cause you need to x,X

2 hours ago, yorpers said:

really the rest of the group doesn't deserve him. 

Nope, not one of them deserves him ? They should thank the gods for him all day long and serve him the finest food they can find!

2 hours ago, yorpers said:

Aye she will learn, maybe... her past would make her very used to living dangerously, so she might just go on a shoplifting spree instead. as far as discipline goes, I do want to get them some rope and chains to play with.?

Well I remember a certain someone put a mod out with a veeeery furnished Chamber she could be dragged into EH I mean.. visit someday

2 hours ago, yorpers said:

I told you she develops a cruel side?  but as far as her fighting skills go, she has yet to fight anything really powerful. 

Well if she gets random things in dungeons shoved in more often, she will be fighting chlamydia at one point ?

25 minutes ago, Gukahn said:

Well if she gets random things in dungeons shoved in more often, she will be fighting chlamydia at one point ?

yeah praise talos for fantasy style medicine, just sip a potion and all is cured

26 minutes ago, Gukahn said:

Well I remember a certain someone put a mod out with a veeeery furnished Chamber she could be dragged into EH I mean.. visit someday

not sure when I'll end up using that place. might need a kidnapping/rescue thing at some point.

29 minutes ago, Gukahn said:

Yeah, I remember you saying that cutting stuff out x,x

But I also understand you wanting to get this out of the way asap. I have those moments too, something that you just do cause you need to x,X

yeah it was one that i kind of wanted out of the way. this will set up the path back to a very different solitude though?