Jump to content
KoolHndLuke

Toxic Masculinity and Men's Shame

Recommended Posts

9 hours ago, GimmeBACON said:

... and in the end, the children are the biggest victims in this rigged system.

VERY.  I'm reminded of a quote from Final Fantasy: Advent Children, "in times of strife, children are usually the first to suffer."  Its a sad statistic especially in terms ecological and political strife of principalities to ingrained in their own idealism to actually pay attention to the fact that they remain woefully ignorant of those who are affected the most.  Take this so-called, "woke," culture who have assumed they consider themselves the moral arbiters of society, wanting to go so far as to make fossil fuel use criminally illegal in large swaths of the world.  What they fail to understand (which says a lot of their naive forms of, "education," or lack there-of) is doing so would result in not just lack of transportation but innocent people dying by the millions each day.  We can't just go, "cold turkey," with a snap of the fingers.  The world at large needs to be weened off of petroleum slowly.  Reason why idiots like AoC and Thunberg, whom have almost NO education in economics, are in favor of the, "Green New Deal," KNOWING full well it would be disastrous in an economic scale because they've made the assumption ONLY THEY are the moral arbiters of society and everyone else is stupid sheep. 

 

"Assumption is the mother of all FUCK UPS," I believe that quote from the first Under Siege movie is most appropriate.  I am in favor of finding ALTERNATIVES to petroleum use, personally I think petrol use is VERY inefficient; its dangerous, volatile, expensive, hazardous to ones health and the environment so there really needs to be an alternative and fast.  Fusion power, maybe even nuclear powered vehicles IF they can be guaranteed to be safe but to suddenly go cold turkey would be a borderline Apocalyptical scale of death and destruction.

Link to post
11 hours ago, GimmeBACON said:

https://thefatherlessgeneration.wordpress.com/statistics/

 

Maybe if the individual can get past there "phase" they are better off... I don't know, but there's plenty of data that proves most don't all together.

 

Yep.

 

You wonder why America is the utter polarized wasteland of screeching it is, a large chunk of it comes from being unable to have a stable platform when developing.

Link to post

I used to watch Thunderf00t and Drunken Peasants/TheAmazingAtheist. I always enjoyed their takes on modern feminism, though I think it was more ridicule than informative. I just try not to pay attention to any of that shit or identity politics anymore.

Link to post

The greater problem is that one person gets an idea of THEIR utopia. They stand on a soap box and spout their utopia to anyone who might listen... and someone does, or someone with a similar "vision" says "ME TOO!" Next thing you know, they organize, create some formal group and it just continues from there. But, it's THEIR utopia, not mine, maybe not yours. They then make up "rules" as to what is and is not acceptable for society (other people) according to their idea of utopia.

 

Feminists tell me that I shouldn't wear a lace bra or stiletto heels... I'm not a "real" woman in their world of women construction workers with no make up and beer bellies. I'm somehow submissive and whatever other demeaning thing they can think to categorize me as. 

 

My husband is toxic by the standards of some who want men to be women. He should cry more, or whatever other rules and standards they have made up as utopian male.

 

When I think of utopian ideals that all should conform to, my mind goes to thoughts of the great ones who knew THEIR ideas were just perfect for everyone else... I think of names like Hitler, Mao, Engels/ Marx/ Lenin/ Stalin (all the same thing). Yes, conformity to the ideal utopia of those who are willing to impose their ideals on you is what I look for in my life. 

 

 

Link to post
On 2/22/2021 at 7:39 AM, KoolHndLuke said:

Where the hell is Dr. Ruth when you need her? Ninety one and the woman still has sex on the brain. :classic_biggrin:

 

 

A very interesting and elocuent woman. Very sharp for her age.

 

But she seems way out of touch with the modern sexual market. Is she aware of the epidemic of incels and simps? Is she aware of the 80/20 rule, which has already turned into the 90/10 rule? Is she aware that the sexual market is oversaturated with overweight and tattoed women and single mothers? How about all the modern rules and regulations that can get a man metooed in a snap without even any evidence? No wonder I have never come across any of her videos.

Link to post
4 hours ago, catchyorbit said:

Is she aware that the sexual market is oversaturated with overweight and tattoed women and single mothers? How about all the modern rules and regulations that can get a man metooed in a snap without even any evidence? No wonder I have never come across any of her videos.

 

You haven't caught her videos because you're exactly the kind of person expecting sex to randomly attack you in the middle of the night. Perfectly. Just like your excel spreadsheet predicts.

 

Good luck with that.

Link to post
On 2/25/2021 at 2:08 PM, catchyorbit said:

A very interesting and elocuent woman. Very sharp for her age.

 

But she seems way out of touch with the modern sexual market. Is she aware of the epidemic of incels and simps? Is she aware of the 80/20 rule, which has already turned into the 90/10 rule? Is she aware that the sexual market is oversaturated with overweight and tattoed women and single mothers? How about all the modern rules and regulations that can get a man metooed in a snap without even any evidence? No wonder I have never come across any of her videos.

I won't be as hard as 27X, but the 80/20 rule is not a rule but a theory and one that is hotly contested.    While I shouldn't opine on this matter (I have been married for 33 years, getting hitched at 19), I will concede your point that Dr. Ruth may be out of touch, as she was providing advice way back then as well.     Then again, you made some sweeping generalizations in the rest of your post.   Perhaps you mean the 80/20 rule that states that 80 percent of desirable women go for only 20% of desirable men.  The big difference, of course is that desirability is super subjective.   I do not like the mods or the "post your avatars" that feature women who suffer from severe back stress and would not be able to sit down in any chair built on this earth, but.......there are plenty who do.    As for getting "metooed", first it has long been established, since at least the 90s that sexual harassment is anything she says it is, so you should learn to navigate the environment or go full MGTOW and move somewhere where prostitution is legal. 

Link to post

You want my take?  Watch this video in its entirety.  It floors me that this video is this old, and yet all the points are not only still spot on, but the points have only gotten worse since then.  You want men like myself to even entertain the idea of coming back to be productive members of society, producing anything more than what it is that we, ourselves alone, actually need to survive?  Stop treating us as THE ENEMY, and start treating us as what we are: an essential half of the equation.  It's no wonder birthrates are falling off a cliff the way things are these days - and this is ONLY talking about the MEN'S side.  This video doesn't speak at all to the problems women bring to the romancing that used to (emphasis on 'used to') come before making children.  As the quote from the video states: 'It's not about actual toxic masculinity, but the fact that masculinity in and of itself is now considered toxic.'

Society tells us each and every day, many times a day, that it doesn't need us... and then wonders where all the "good men" are.  Okay. Define for me what a 'good man' is.  Oh, wait, it depends on all kinds of factors, and one of the factors that crosses most if not all racial boundaries is age.  Different traits define a "good man" at different ages.  Some of these traits are polar opposites.  And it's all driven by biology.

9:02-9:28 'Masculinity is deemed toxic.  Meanwhile, the feminisation of men is upheld, praised, and defended.  Gone are the days when men were valued and respected for their desires to protect and to lead, and for their societal contributions. As a replacement, our culture has turned them into a punching bag, choosing to focus solely on what men have done wrong, are doing wrong, will do wrong, and how they can "do better".'

She hits the nail on the head so far as I am concerned with how to fix some of the issues at the end of the video:  11:15-11:33 'Find a strong, stable, tight knit, real life community.  ...Escapism, and even the desire to isolate one's self can be extremely tempting now days....'

Figures that this woman's in Austria as per this video.  I would be extremely surprised to see such honesty out of a woman still steeped in the U.S. culture. 
 

 


...And now I know why she disappeared.  I've always liked her content, but lost track of her when she changed her name.

Link to post
On 2/26/2021 at 4:09 PM, steelpanther24 said:

I won't be as hard as 27X, but the 80/20 rule is not a rule but a theory and one that is hotly contested.


You never got into the internet dating scene, then.  Really, that's (the internet dating scene) more than enough proof, perhaps not of exactly 80/20, but it's got to be in the ballpark.  Pulling those statistics apart, it's quite clear that there IS no "trickle down" anymore.  Everyone, female and male, wants a top 10%er on the SMV scale.  They see them, they know they're out there.  And they expect to get them,

Check out the book Freakonomics: A Rouge Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything c. 2005 by Stephen Levitt and Stephen Dubner.  Chapter 2 deals with how online daters lie, and what they lie about, along with some statistics on the percentage of responses people get, and who responds to whom.  That doesn't come right out and show the 80/20 rule in black and white, but it sure does hint at it.  Oh, and the book's a damn good read while you're at it.  There's a sequel, as well.

Link to post
19 hours ago, AKM said:

Check out the book Freakonomics: A Rouge Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything c. 2005 by Stephen Levitt and Stephen Dubner.  Chapter 2 deals with how online daters lie, and what they lie about, along with some statistics on the percentage of responses people get, and who responds to whom.  That doesn't come right out and show the 80/20 rule in black and white, but it sure does hint at it.  Oh, and the book's a damn good read while you're at it.  There's a sequel, as well.

 

Know that book well and qouted it a few times at work regarding the economy of the war on terror.  I was not popular for a while.  

 

As for avoiding internet dating...you mean it has chanced since the following?

 

Spoiler

 

 

Link to post
2 hours ago, steelpanther24 said:

 

Know that book well and qouted it a few times at work regarding the economy of the war on terror.  I was not popular for a while.  

 

As for avoiding internet dating...you mean it has chanced since the following?

 

  Hide contents

 

 

Ah yes, these two.  Classic.  The best part about it all: The fact that what Jay is talking about in the second half is nothing other than Cancel Culture 101.  What's going on now in the real world, again?  This telling it like it is was one of the last gasps of sanity before the real world went off the proverbial cliff.  Welcome to Bonkers World, sir.  Stuff's messed up.  Won't see a meaningful correction in my lifetime, I'm sure.

Link to post

Re: Ruth has dealt with facts only for years, and while she's far more nuanced with global trends and dealing with the things around sex for years, I mean that was literally the whole point of her show, getting sex to normalize or "get better" based on the all behavioral shit around sex. Like fetishes.

 

The main difference now and when her show was in prime time is both sexes can just drop any pretense of civility or fairness, and so they have, and you'll find both sexes being "snobs" by all kinds of degrees. There's no question men are getting shit on by landslide, but the other side of that equation is many men are often trying to get in anywhere they can, with rather predictable results, and there is a also a giant swath of women particularly in social venues and circles (even this forum) that are in literal denial because they made their choice or got their choice made years ago and consider their circumstances the absolute norm along with "all my friends too", and the truth often being their mans ain't as great as portrayed and their circle of "all my" friends is like four other women they can actually stand to be around for more than a couple hours alone with in a free-to-talk setting, and meanwhile they live in Chicago. Great ratio.

 

All that said, the mopey maudlin ass waiting around for my waifu to materialize out of thin air crowd far out number the people putting in relational work, and the rather predictable results in those circles don't need a scientific study to bear out the obvious.

 

 

Link to post

The world just keeps getting better, regardless of what the feminists or other communities of busybodies have been doing lately.

 

People all over the world are getting dumber, which elevates my value as a professional on the labour market.

 

Women are growing more honest and showing more of their true nature on social media.

 

So much free information and content on the Internet for any taste. There's just not enough free time to peruse and relish all of it.

 

No more social norms and gender roles to hold people back.

 

Robotic love dolls keep improving. I can't wait to buy an android with the perfect body that could move like a real human being and hold discussions.

 

This is by far better than the flying cars that people were expecting a few decades ago.

Link to post
2 hours ago, catchyorbit said:

This is by far better than the flying cars that people were expecting a few decades ago.

 

Flying car was just a euphemism for sex robot. Basically feature rich town bike.

Link to post
2 hours ago, catchyorbit said:

Women are growing more honest and showing more of their true nature on social media.

 

So much free information and content on the Internet for any taste. There's just not enough free time to peruse and relish all of it.

 

Right here.  Social media, and the fact that people became okay with putting the actual truth out there, rather than upholding the old pretenses that tended to maintain the old system.

Social media also vastly increased the pool available options for everyone.  No longer is there any incentive for either sex to make any attempt at all to work through problems.  It's like the job market used to be: Don't like you're current situation?  Walk out the door and down the street; there's someone else perfectly willing to take you just a short stroll away, so no need to work through any problems.  And people wonder why, when jumping straight to sex, and baby making, while making the old serious questions of courtship seem "too serious", that we have so many guys just getting what they want and then walking, and women just getting what they want, and then wondering why they're suddenly raising a baby all alone.

Link to post

I've seen another fascinating take which is: Women are the gatekeepers to sex, this is known.  So why is it that so many women give sex so freely?  Is it because, in this age of the empowered woman, that they literally feel that sex is all they have to offer?  If not, and he walks, so what, he wasn't worth your time anyway, and a better option will present himself sooner or later.  But so many women get wrapped up in the 'I need to keep THIS man!' mentality, even to the point of baby trapping the guy.  Counting on the fact that most men don't have the fortitude to withhold on their sexual urges, and monetizing it.  If he doesn't have sex with her, he's a pathetic loser, but when he does, if SHE decides to get pregnant, it's 'He knew the consequences of his actions, man up and raise the kid!'.  Where's the term 'woman up'?  Oh wait, it doesn't exist.  So, if he didn't want the kid, and she gets pregnant and he leaves... again, he's a pathetic loser.

And then you get someone I've known personally for years who wanted a baby when I first met her, then whored around, then got a guy to marry her, got pregnant... and guess what?  Shortly after the baby was born, she decided that she 'didn't need that man in her life anymore'.  Single mother BY CHOICE.  But she's the victim.  When I asked her about it, the answer was, paraphrase: 'Oh, I want a man to be this kid's role model!'  But not have any of the fun, just all the responsibility now that fun time is over. Sure, whatever.

Oh, and while I'm at it, there are plenty of ways to fake pregnancy commercially available.  They even go so far as presenting fake information to hospitals, so that the hospital can't tell the difference and then the officials go to the guy with REAL documentation.  But when the female gets caught in this, IF she gets caught, there are rarely if ever consequences to the scale that the man would face.

Don't believe me?  Look at the "foodie call" explosion.  Women (strong, independent women) using the romantic system to cash in on men.  Going on "dates" getting free meals, with NO intention of ever seeing the man again.  Women do it day in and day out.  Men?  Remember that guy in the Western U.S. who did that?  The authorities were on him very quickly, and most of the places comped the meal for the woman - she had to pay NOTHING after being walked out on.  But were she a guy?  HA! Yeah.  Them's the breaks; pay up, dude!

Or how about the "strong independent" women who go on dates, and persuade men to do things for them that they would otherwise have to pay someone to do, like plumbing, or fixing a door, or whatever... and then never see the man again.  Free labour.

...But it's the MEN who have a monopoly on toxicity and should feel shame? 

Bullshit.

Men are slowly getting wise to such tactics.  But there's a big problem in the never ending stream of young, naive, and hopeful men coming of age, and the cycle just continues to spiral.  They don't know how bad it is because THIS is their reality.  THIS is what they know. 

 

Oh, and finally, with this whole virus crap going on, what business is exploding?  OnlyFans.  Online, no-touch, no-risk prostitution.  When things get bad, and shit gets real, an amazing portion of women are reverting, even electronically, to the world's oldest profession: prostitution.  And they don't even have to physically put out to sell their bodies.

Again: It's MEN who have a monopoly on toxicity and should feel shame?

Meh.

Link to post
20 hours ago, AKM said:

Where's the term 'woman up'?  Oh wait, it doesn't exist.  So, if he didn't want the kid, and she gets pregnant and he leaves... again, he's a pathetic loser.

 

I actually use that term and the effects are hilarious. Also, shaming tactics don't work on men in the 21st century. Men are yet to enjoy the fun of using women's own playbook against them.

 

20 hours ago, AKM said:

Oh, and while I'm at it, there are plenty of ways to fake pregnancy commercially available.  They even go so far as presenting fake information to hospitals, so that the hospital can't tell the difference and then the officials go to the guy with REAL documentation.  But when the female gets caught in this, IF she gets caught, there are rarely if ever consequences to the scale that the man would face.


Don't believe me?  Look at the "foodie call" explosion.  Women (strong, independent women) using the romantic system to cash in on men.  Going on "dates" getting free meals, with NO intention of ever seeing the man again.  Women do it day in and day out.  Men?  Remember that guy in the Western U.S. who did that?  The authorities were on him very quickly, and most of the places comped the meal for the woman - she had to pay NOTHING after being walked out on.  But were she a guy?  HA! Yeah.  Them's the breaks; pay up, dude!

 

The problem here is that men aren't filing complaints and charges and aren't organising mass protests, unlike women, which is why women are taken seriously and men are not. As for the dine-and-dash guy, he got 13 years of jail, if I'm not mistaken. He is a national hero and a martyr because he caused a precedent that men should take advantage of. Shower the police with similar charges. Let them drown in the deluge of paperwork, they will have no other choice than to do something about it.

 

In addition to that, blacklist those food joints or, better, don't use any food joint and only make your own food. You never know how many people with all kinds of infection used the utensils and tableware or what meal the waiter spat into.

 

The foodie call explosion is in decline in my area. Female forums are full of women's whining about men splitting the bill on dates.

 

20 hours ago, AKM said:

Or how about the "strong independent" women who go on dates, and persuade men to do things for them that they would otherwise have to pay someone to do, like plumbing, or fixing a door, or whatever... and then never see the man again.  Free labour.

 

Simps deserve to pay and suffer. The more, the better.

 

20 hours ago, AKM said:

Men are slowly getting wise to such tactics.  But there's a big problem in the never ending stream of young, naive, and hopeful men coming of age, and the cycle just continues to spiral.  They don't know how bad it is because THIS is their reality.  THIS is what they know.

 

Young folks are actually smarter than we expected. They are imbibing the knowledge and wisdom like sponges. You can find many comments on YouTube from folks as young as 14 who are already aware of the current dating scene. A lot of them are not interested in dating. Wise choice.

 

20 hours ago, AKM said:

Oh, and finally, with this whole virus crap going on, what business is exploding?  OnlyFans.  Online, no-touch, no-risk prostitution.

 

Actually, OnlyFans got oversaturated with content, which has caused a large drop in revenues. There were even some articles written about it. Some women who lost their jobs thought they would be swimming in cash, but the reality was a little predictable and they made laughable sums. And that's not to mention that the tax inspectors would like to have a word with the content creators on that website. Moreover, a lot of women got compromised by posting photos and ruined their reputation, derailing their chances to get a decent job in the future.

 

20 hours ago, AKM said:

When things get bad, and shit gets real, an amazing portion of women are reverting, even electronically, to the world's oldest profession: prostitution.  And they don't even have to physically put out to sell their bodies.

 

The thing is that they have never left prostitution. Prostitution is exchange of sex for personal gains, aka resources, services, status, etc. It means that when someone's wife says that she will have some bedroom fun with her husband only after he does the dishes, for instance, she has just prostituted herself. Now, try to find a woman who has not done something like this.

Link to post

Yeah, yeah.... I know what you're thinking- "Duh! Where the fuck have you been?!!". But, honestly I never gave it much thought as to how it might impact my life personally. So where is it officially okay to flirt now?

Link to post
8 hours ago, catchyorbit said:

 

I actually use that term and the effects are hilarious. Also, shaming tactics don't work on men in the 21st century. Men are yet to enjoy the fun of using women's own playbook against them.

 

 

The problem here is that men aren't filing complaints and charges and aren't organising mass protests, unlike women, which is why women are taken seriously and men are not. As for the dine-and-dash guy, he got 13 years of jail, if I'm not mistaken. He is a national hero and a martyr because he caused a precedent that men should take advantage of. Shower the police with similar charges. Let them drown in the deluge of paperwork, they will have no other choice than to do something about it.

 

In addition to that, blacklist those food joints or, better, don't use any food joint and only make your own food. You never know how many people with all kinds of infection used the utensils and tableware or what meal the waiter spat into.

 

The foodie call explosion is in decline in my area. Female forums are full of women's whining about men splitting the bill on dates.

 

 

Simps deserve to pay and suffer. The more, the better.

 

 

Young folks are actually smarter than we expected. They are imbibing the knowledge and wisdom like sponges. You can find many comments on YouTube from folks as young as 14 who are already aware of the current dating scene. A lot of them are not interested in dating. Wise choice.

 

 

Actually, OnlyFans got oversaturated with content, which has caused a large drop in revenues. There were even some articles written about it. Some women who lost their jobs thought they would be swimming in cash, but the reality was a little predictable and they made laughable sums. And that's not to mention that the tax inspectors would like to have a word with the content creators on that website. Moreover, a lot of women got compromised by posting photos and ruined their reputation, derailing their chances to get a decent job in the future.

 

 

The thing is that they have never left prostitution. Prostitution is exchange of sex for personal gains, aka resources, services, status, etc. It means that when someone's wife says that she will have some bedroom fun with her husband only after he does the dishes, for instance, she has just prostituted herself. Now, try to find a woman who has not done something like this.

 

That's fantastic.  I'd love to see the results of telling some female to woman up.  Might be something on the infamous Youtube.

A fair chunk of men don't have time to complain to anyone but themselves.  Too busy keeping the world running.  Literally.  As for letting the police drown in paperwork, the police are the enforcers of the laws, they can't actually change them.  It's the damn lawmakers we need to drown in paperwork... except that they don't even read the laws they sign!  Additionally, there are very few situations where individuals will willingly throw away their lives (or just the possibility thereof), either literally or figuratively for the common good.  Far too many people will let the status quo be, no matter how bad it treats them.

Absolutely with the food joints vs home cooking.  I can count on my hands how many times I've gone out to restaurants in a year, vs others.  It's ridiculous.

Maybe foodie calls are on the decline.  Maybe not.  Personally, I gave dating my shot, I got my results, and I said: 'Fuck it.  If this is what dating is, when what I really wanted to be involved with was courtship, then I'm just not interested enough, by a long shot.'  It got so bad that I accepted my last girlfriend despite the fact that she HAD had sex with someone already, despite the fact that it's one of my deal breakers (in theory).  Even had a colleague - who had, literally, come from Africa (Camaroon) less than a year before - tell me: 'This is what's available on the market today.'  Either he had some serious exposure to the U.S. market, or it really is that bad in Camaroon, too, in which case, I don't see how there's any hope for people who think old school like me much of anywhere in the world.

The problem with simps is that most of us were raised to think that way.  It's what we see in movies.  It's what we're told by our parents ('Why the hell should I give a woman I want to marry a highly compressed rock made of the most common substance in the universe?  That's ludicrous!'  'Well, see, son, that's just "What's Expected".'  'Okay, Dad.  YOU do whatever, I'M not spending that kind of money on diamond anything, unless it's a drill bit I need to drill through super tough metal or something.  Fuck that!'  Thing is, the men of my generation didn't have the well developed internet the youngsters of today do.  We were told one thing, while we watched another unfold in front of us.  For a lot of guys my age, it was a 'simp stage'.  I did it to - until recognized what was going on and swore off dating.  Now I'm invisible to them.  It's great, if a little sad.  Oh well.

Young folks have much easier access to information than we did.  A lot of 'smart' is not so much questing for knowledge, but knowing where to obtain that knowledge.  If you want the information, but don't know where to go, you're NOT getting that information, no matter how badly you want it.  Today, virtually any information you could possibly want is at your fingertips.  Makes it considerably easier.  In any case, with social media, people aren't hiding their true natures anymore, and you'd have to be beyond blind not to see the truth when it's posted everywhere, every day.

Yeah, I've seen those stats about OnlyFans.  Pretty hilarious, really, especially the end result of ruined possibilities down the line when one's nudes show up on a simple search that any potential employer will be doing. 

There's a difference between prostitution and a symbiotic relationship.  I'd be perfectly okay with 'These are the things that need doing that she does, and these are the things that need doing that I do.'.  You know, the whole 'sexually define roles'.  The roles that so many women seem to have tossed aside in their bid to be as like men as possible.  Still, even when things get really bad (country's falling apart at the seams, rampant inflation, etc.), women will sell their youth and (if they have it) beauty until they no longer can.  Then?  Well, I've heard more than one literal example of sharing the cat food with the cats.  Unfortunate, really.

Oh!  Just ran into another video: 'Successful women unhappy that they have to "date down"'.  Yeah.  And?  Ha!  Video's from November 2019.  The problem, according to the video: Men. Men don't make enough MONEY!!!   'There aren't enough financially eligible bachelors.'  Translation: There isn't enough gold in the mine.

But men have a monopoly on toxic, and should feel shame.
 

Spoiler

 

 

Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...