or people who simply feel both dominant and submissive,

It is almost as stupid to tell a switch "you simply cant decide what you like more so you stick with both" as telling that to a bi-sexuell person.

To face it, Fetishs and Kinks are a very complex thing going on in the Mind and for someone to understand it is very hard, basicly impossible.

So the next time your stumbeling across a Fetish you didnt know yet, dont try to argue with the Person having it that its stupid or weird.

Try to respect their interests, as they will respect yours.

Aslong as everything is consentual, its not your decission what someone else likes in bed...

It is okay to have such fantasys, aslong as they stay fantasys or are practiced consentual.

There are many people in the BDSM community who have interest in fake rape, even my Submissive loves that (i dont do them regulary tho and not that hard as im still a bit uncomftorble with even played unconsentuality.)

What exacly is fake rape tho?

Fakerape is a kind of Sex where Partners trust another and know another enougth to see limits and boundaries, when their partner is happy and when not.

Once that is the case and both agree on it, they can fresh up their play by one side randomly (if the situation allows it) grab their Partner and do whatever they want with them, while "whatever they want" means "do what they know their partner likes"

There are atleast as many people into beeing used however their Partner wants to, as there are people who want todo everything with their partner without having to ask.

It is ofcourse a mental question how you stand to this topic, in my case i feel uncomftorble with just taking my girl, even tho she wants to,  as it just feels unnatural to me to have sex with a person without atleast knowing what they want that day, as interest and mood changes quickly, beeing able to talk during the game and so on. 

The important point on this topic is: Rape fantasys are okay, aslong as they are lived out consentualy or not atall

and it turned out a guy which i was friends with from the local BDSM community was a furry aswell, we had some fun time teaching people about BDSM while he walked around with a tail on his Butt, his and my girlfriend poked me with it dozend of times xD

after a while his Friends showed up, in fullbody furrie suits.

Honestly i never really understud what people liked about furrys so much, to that point...

We all ended up Groupcuddeling, basicly rubbing myself against that fur while beeing petted with paws was so cozy its unbelievable.

Like many Kinky communitys it turned out that the Furry community was a very open and nice one where everyone tried to have a fun time.

The best way to get an opinion on a group of people or fetish is to make contact with those people :3

I have met several people who tried Bondage without knowing stuff about it and they seriously hurt theirself, i will talk more about that on another lesson.

Have you ever had a string or something around your finger for a longer time? just to notice how it gets a bit numb?

Thats because the blood is unable to flow when its cut off, also the nerves get a bit affected.

(I apologize if some of this is medicaly wrong as im not a medical student but just someone into bdsm)

The Human body has some Pressure points and areas that shouldnt be used during bondage. Unless you reverse the tention this is a nogo zone, and if you dont know how to reverse rope tention, then dont try using rope there.

All these above marked areas should never be used for rope, fifty shades ofcourse doesnt care about that, as there isnt even real bondage except some "tied to bedpost" things.

In the spoiler you see a image that should be rather popular or familair under fifty shades viewers.

Not only that the knot on the bedpost is basicly nonexistent, you see how she still has her hand on the rope, normaly this is done for "just having something to hold onto" reasons, here i belive she does it to make sure the rope isnt firm around her arm, which is basicly already seeable that the rope is just layed around the arm and not really restricting it.

i saw people, as this picture is so prominant, trying to copy exacly this. Theyve put tention on it, played for maybe 5-10 minutes and afterwards the tied up person  had serious nerve damage on that hand.

The Second thing id like to adress is Impact play, which is basicly and play that includes some sort of "pain"

such as Spankings, whippings, floggings, cannings and so on

Impact play can leave serious damage if done wrong, there are certain areas that simply arent suppost to be used for such play.

https://qph.ec.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-4d3c72a3213abde667d2e8d6510a11f1-c

its actually written down below the picture but here ill list it again for anyone who might be unable to read it or something

Green = okay to play here

Yellow = Be Cautious

Orange (should actually be red) = Important bones, nerves and organs. Only light slaps, nothing more.

Pink = Not atall!

already saw people seriously hurt theirself with this.

I hope everyone takes this lesson seriously.

Dont get me wrong, i understand the thrill some may have at this "domination + rape" fantasys.

I just want to make Clear here, that BDSM is Consentual play, like every Sex should be and not a form of Rape as some media may show.

BDSM is build on multiple systems, the most commen used is S.S.C:

Safe

Sane

Consentual

safe: attempts should be made to identify and prevent risks to health

sane: activities should be undertaken in a sane and sensible frame of mind

consensual: all activities should involve the full consent of all parties involved.

Its a thrill to think about having total control of someone, specially if they cant defend theirself. Thats why its such a whidely spread fantasy. There are also many members of my local BDSM community who show interest in "Fake Rape" where Partners that know another since a very long time (and know what their partner likes, dislikes, where their limits are) just randomly grab them and do whatever they want with them.

This is still done with Safewords tho.

(for everyone who doesnt know what Safewords are, in the spoiler below i will try to explain it)

So i can totaly understand anyone having Rape fantasys, there is nothing wrong about them. Its just important to seperate those fantasys from real life BDSM, otherwise misconseptions will be created and already exist, 50 shades for example, which  already caused bodily and mental harm to multiple people i know and to myself.

I hope this thread explained some things for people new to BDSM