I have never said anything about you being the only one having a problem with submit. For me, the seduction part of Submit works perfectly, and this is using Sexlab 1.59c. I do run into issues with PC submitting during the tie up phase (when I've actually used that functionality on the very few times I've played a female character) causing a crash. Same problem others have had. Because of this issue, I finally took the time to check out Defeat, and found I like it as much as Submit (once I got used to the control differences). Currently I use Defeat to initiate rape (PC on NPC) and Player submit, and use Submit's seduction functionality for non-aggressive sex (I like the way that Submit's seduction function can affect relationship ranking). I'm no "white knight" defending the mod saying it's the greatest thing since sliced bread. I have used it from near the beginning of it's inception and have provided help with issues, to both dk and to users. It definitely has issues (just like nearly every single fucking mod on this site), and I definitely agree that it needs to be updated. However, being demanding about it is not going to get the fixes in. I have no clue as to how long ago you sent any PM's to dk, but he hasn't been on line in over a 1 month, and he was missing for quite some time (I'm talking months, not days) before the last set updates he made to the mod (which I believe was when SL version 1.57 was released - not 100% on which version but pretty sure it was pre 1.58). Frankly we have no clue as to whether dk is still even modding or not. He may have decided to move on. So again, demanding fixes is not going to do any good. Frankly, I was more annoyed about the whiny, privileged, Nexus-user-like attitude coming from someone who has complained mightily and in great detail about Nexus and it's users. As Morferous mentioned above, there is a patch posted earlier which alleviates some issues (haven't tested it myself):
Submit submission event itself works well with patch posted above
And as I mentioned, Defeat handles the player rape (player instigated and player as victim) rather well and both mods can be used simultaneously. Yes there are problems, and a fix would be very welcome, but if you expect everyone to jump at your words and fix something just because you decide to shout about it, well you are going to be disappointed a lot.